AIBU to want to be a discreet pooper? (lighthearted)

[Lovemypeaceandquiet]

NC for this, but I couldn’t help myself to ask if I’m the only one.

I don’t like people to know when I’m popping.

As in, I don’t like to make it obvious - let’s say I can’t just get up and go for a longer toilet break and then come back to the room full of people knowing they know I’ve just been for a number 2.

So I time my toilet time for when no one is around.

For example I’ve got guests staying over this weekend, so I woke up before everyone else to use the downstairs toilet.

Alternatively, I wait for everyone to wake up and go downstairs, so I can use the upstairs bathroom before taking a shower, so the lengthy stay in there is justified by something else than taking a 💩

Even when it’s just me & my husband in the house, I choose the furthers bathroom away from him!

I know it’s a natural thing and everyone does number 2, but it makes me uncomfortable to think that someone knows exactly when I do it 😬

I honestly don't think people care that you're pooping. Are you literally holding it in or forcing it out just so others don't know?

I couldn't care less about it, it's a natural human function. My sister in law is like you though.

YANBU I'm similar to you op, I do not want others knowing my business. I also will never go in a public toilet.

No, I just choose times (v early or very late usually) so no one can witness me going to the loo for a number 2😂

I'm exactly the same as you OP

Are you stubborn, perfectionistic, tidy and seek order?

Have other people witnessed this to you? I mean have others commented?

I’m stubborn but I’m certainly not tidy or a perfectionist 😁

I'm exactly the same
however since being with my partner I've relaxed more about it which has helped me not find pooing so stressful!

How can you time it? When I need to go, I need to go!

@dudsville no actually, I can’t recall anyone making a fuss about my going to the toilet. In fact when I was a child, I’d take my sweet time in the loo - bringing books with me to keep me occupied 😂

I actually envy people who don’t stress about who might know, hear or smell them having a 💩

I'm similar to you as in I will use the furthest loo/combine with a shower. But I will use a public loo if needed, I'm just select with which looks/cubicle/timings.
Written down it sounds mad but with IBS I really don't want to subject anyone else to my noxious whiffs or noises!!

Yup... I do this.

And public pooping is just off limits.

💩

@WhoopItUp well I know it’s usually within an hour after I wake up, so if I know I won’t have the opportunity to poop in peace due to guests staying over for example, I just wake up earlier.

Im also able to restrain myself, especially if I’m staying over at someone’s place! If I can’t relax, my body just shuts down! I can literally be constipated for a day or two if I haven’t got the perfect conditions 😆

I’m the same. I’m actually a billion times better than I was (it was part of my ocd) but public toilets are off limits for me and if staying with others I only go when I’m going to shower afterwards. I’ve no issues with my kids coming in the bathroom when I’m going though which is massive progress for me. It’s a never for DH though!

Freudian theory would say you have some kind of unresolved potty training issue and a more anal-retentive personality.
I think you're probably just trying to be polite, maybe a bit of an over thinker and a bit self conscious about going to the toilet in close proximity to people, which is totally normal. I can't even poop properly with my kids in the house. Probably TMI but after a school Holliday when they go back to school I usually find I'm pretty constipated and it is relieved easily the moment I can have a totally solo experience 😂 When I used to flat share I was the same, I would wait until everyone else was out. I also can't go properly in public toilets or at other people's houses, and struggle to go on holiday

I went on a girls holiday years ago and one of the girls didn’t do a no. 2 the whole week as she was embarrassed.
My kids on the other hand used to want to go when we were out for the day and public toilets aren’t the best. I bought a travel seat that fitted over the actual toilet seat and keep saying don’t touch ANYTHING!70

It’s not good to hold it in. You should go whenever you need to.

And me! I know many other women with the same issues but none of the men I know seem at all bothered.

Yaay, there’s more of us! 😉

@AngelaRayner4PM omg, a flat share would be the end of me. Sharing bathroom with other people that I know bothers me the most. Strangers, not so much - so I’m actually ok with public toilets but it’s very rare (like when I’m at the airport and know it’s either that or the airplane🙅🏻‍♀️).

Speaking of airplanes. My husband is the total opposite of me, he’s a shameless popper, doesn’t care one bit who might know he’s just gone for a 💩. I never forget when we flew together for the first time, and he went to the loo (which in a budget airline is pretty obvious) and was there for ages. He came back to the seat and told me “you don’t want to go in there😷”. I was mortified haha

She is Sheldon Cooper reincarnated 😊

My worst pooping experience was at my MIL’s, she had a separate loo and shower, and the toilet was right next to her bedroom. I went to all sorts of lengths when staying over at hers to cover up my #2 time 😅

Oh yes my kids love pooping in public loos too @pinkstripeycat they prefer to do whilst telling me All about it, ideally with the door open for extra publicity. Like they are on a real throne and everything they do needs an audience. They love doing the same thing at their grandparents, but maybe that's because for some reason they have been given them chocolate buttons for successful poos since potty training, whereas I never have.

I've always been like that and for over 50 years never even used a public lol for pooping but now have developed Graves' Disease which means the overwhelming urge can happen anytime. I make sure to always have VIPoo handy now (I'm not particularly smelly but it helps on the confidence side) and, due to necessity, have had to get over this issue.

I'm noticing how much thinking about other people is a part of your toileting, whereas for me this doesn't factor at all. It's not that I don't care about other people knowing I'm on the toilet, it's literally that I'm not thinking of other people when I'm on the toilet.