To think that not many people live an average life anymore?

[Meandbee22]

I turned 25 last week and am currently 15 weeks pregnant with my first child- I’m worrying how we’re going to afford life when the baby’s here. I live in quite an average area (covid made the house prices rise quite a lot though) but have noticed that so many people seem to live extravagant lifestyles now- it’s almost like you’re either very well off or struggling quite a lot with money. Whenever a house gets sold within days there’s builders in ripping the place apart and having the place completely redone- no one seems to just move in anymore. Most people seem to drive mercs or BMW’s- no one really has an average car anymore. Lots of people take their kids out to eat at the Ivy a lot around here- no one seems to take their kids to McDonald’s anymore! I grew up in an average family and I grew up in the 2000s so I’m not feeling nostalgic over the simplicity of the 90s (was only born in 97 so don’t have any memories of the 90s). My dad worked full time and my mum worked part time but we had a nice average life- we had a PlayStation and went on a uk caravan holiday every other year and went to McDonald’s on our birthdays and just did normal things like that- we didn’t buy much, but today the Amazon delivery driver more or less lives on my street he’s here so often! I am worried that I can’t afford much for my child and they will see other children with all these exciting things. I was just wondering if anyone else had felt similar

We were COMPLETELY skint at 25! Slightly better at 35, a lot better by 45.

We live in a very wealthy neighbourhood but no one splashes the cash! Victorian terraces / villas of up to £1.2 million but in general it’s camping in France and old cars! Lots of second hand Boden and Isla bikes in the local FB groups though!

Leasing has taken a bit of a hit the past couple of years due to covid...New cars were being produced at a hugely reduced rate. So I had to order back in November for an April delivery date. And @ReadyToMoveIt is totally right, I now have no fear when a scary light comes on the dash or something goes wrong. It'll be picked up from my home, fixed at no extra cost to me, courtesy car provided and my vehicle delivered back, all fixed.
The peace of mind is priceless. My monthly payment is fixed, no worries when things (inevitably) go wrong.

I think you could safely say that the finance is coming from banks for the mortgage, car finance and credit cards to fund holidays and lifestyle.
A friend of mine lives a very perfect lifestyle on the outside but is aways waiting for his pay to drop into his account as he's skint at the end of every month.
He nearly died when we were due to go onto 80% pay during furlough.
External portrayed wealth does not equate to actual wealth.

You can't live in an average area. I live somewhere where a 2bed flat is 650k and most people have second hand cars & wait to do renovations

Family money makes far more difference than earning a good salary though & some people are millionaires simply because of when they bought.

Protect yourselves by limiting the number of dc, and your outlook will much improved.

Have you seen birth rates? younger people just aren't having dc, which creates other economic issues.

The gap between rich and poor is getting wider - with less people in the middle so i suppose an average life is going to either be poor or rich with less in the middle

Doesn't sound like my area at all.
One thing that is similar is the Amazon (and other) deliveries but that's due to online shopping - often Essentials and household items, not exciting toys and gadgets - taking over from the high street and retail parks.

Much like MN- two camps, those that live hand to mouth and those that can save thousands of pounds a month. Where are the people who can save a few hundred, have 1 holiday abroad a year, have a mortgage but wont pay it off before retirement.....

We fit in the middle & yes there doesn't seem to be many of us on MNs! We have a ok/good income (I think) but have a massive mortgage & won't be paying it off early. It's common on Mns for someone to earn 100k but be mortgage free or have a £440 mortgage which doesn't reflect any reality I know.

We have a lot of nice things but a large majority of it is second hand but good quality second hand stuff! My children wear lovely clothes but they are 95% preloved.
Get yourself on vinted, Facebook marketplace, Depop, shpok, eBay etc.

I know what you mean about all the renovations! So many here all the time!

I must say about cars you never notice anyone driving old bangers anymore. Car parks are full of nice cars, well nice to me as I would not know one from another apart from they look shiny and smart. Where have all the old bangers gone?

I don't recognise the picture you paint.

The queue at McDonalds is often blocking the road near here.
None of the people I know who have bought a house recently have the money to then do work on it straightaway, or expensive work they are paying people for (many will decorate when they move in).

Cars are very much down to what people want. Nothing to do with their income. a lot to do with their priorities.

Also remember we have had years of low interest rates which makes borrowing money for renovations etc very attractive

@crimsonlake

I must say about cars you never notice anyone driving old bangers anymore. Car parks are full of nice cars, well nice to me as I would not know one from another apart from they look shiny and smart. Where have all the old bangers gone?

Look at the number plates. Some of those 'nice shiny cars' are 10 to 15 years old.

DP has just swapped a 13 YO car for a slightly bigger 11 YO one with lower mileage.

Neither car looks anything like an 'old banger'. Both look quite new and smart until you look at the plates.

I was fortunate enough to buy my first house at 25 with my then partner (since divorced) and am now mortgage free at 51. Daughter at 28, son at 34. Same dad.
My daughter is 23 and has a good job. I drive an ancient Mini and she's just bought a 2 yr old Mercedes 180 but she can afford it, living with her dad and paying no rent. She has also saved enough since working from 18 to buy a flat next year (London).
She has just got back from a 5 day trip to Paris with her boyfriend - they went to Disney, game at PSG etc. I'm obviously pleased for her and she works hard. As does her boyfriend. They're off to South Africa on safari in November.
She doesn't want to have kids until she's bought her own place and travelled more. Same as me at that age.
My son is 17 and gets 80 a month pocket money - he and his girlfriend do go to Groucho for dinner! Makes me laugh as i never did that as a teenager.
It was the local kebab house for us!

Oh and my kids dad owns a house outright plus a flat that he owns outright that he rents out (he inherited). My partner and I own a house which we live in - but we moved out of London so 1000s less and two flats we rent out (one each). Bought a house and two flats for the price of a central London flat!

@EvenLess07 - lovely post 😊

Totally agree about the Tomy squeaky eggs. My DS loved his as a toddler. Hours of fun. And one of my favourite photos of all time (he's now 9!) was when he carefully posted the entire boxful down the front of his (tucked in) top and gleefully paraded around the kitchen showing off his new, rotund, bumpy, tummy!

And all my clothes, bags etc are second hand. The only things I buy from shop new, are for my son.

we come in at about 25th centile of populationin terms of income but we have no mortgage as own home outright, our DD is too old to need childcare live in a relatively cheap but nice area ( out in the sticks) we do more than average miles in car ( due to being a bit remote ) we are self employed part time and have more than enough
it really depends what your money has to pay for

@FairyPolkadot

If there’s an Ivy nearby then you live in a wealthy area. I lived in that kind of town for a few years and a lot of people were doing the things you describe - but many weren’t. I think you just notice those who are doing those things because, well, they’re out and about at in the Ivy and we tend to notice fancy cars etc..

I didn’t like living in that town because so many people were so into money. But actually, many were living a quiet, low key life. You just didn’t notice them for that reason. They were too busy gardening and living a more low key life.

The mock Ivys are quite cheap though. They are a Carluccios level- similar to Wagamamas. That because the food is mass produced chill and cook (microwave meals)

The not so average people are just more visible trust me!
Also in my opinion people with luxury lifestyles are doing their kids no favours anyway. Giving them a completely warped view of what being happy is and what it should look like that will only lead to dissapointment and/or a life of constant pressure trying to maintain.

We occasionally take our kids to posh restaurants but they eat at McDonalds first and will only have an ice cream and tap water in the restaurant - works out cheaper than a babysitter! Not sure where that places us on the average lifestyle scale!

It sounds like the area you live in is pretty affluent. I live on a housing estate in the south east. 1970s built terraced houses, mix of owner occupiers and privately rented. I would say myself and most of my neighbours are very average. We drive second hand, mid range cars, shop at Asda. My kids (when they were younger) would go to McDonalds, now they're older it's Nando's or Wagamama's. I've not been abroad for a while, but I know my neighbours go to places like Spain, Crete or Gran Canaria, next door went to a caravan site in Weymouth last week with their kids.

Please don't worry about trying to keep up or your kids missing out. Kids value the silliest things. If you ask my DS (23) his best childhood memory, he'll tell you it's when our car broke down and we had to walk home in the snow!

The mock Ivys are quite cheap though. They are a Carluccios level- similar to Wagamamas.

I would say the Ivy cafes are about 1/3 more expensive than Wagamama, I don't think they are that cheap. The shepherds pie is about £15.

Yeah the Ivy Brasseries are more expensive than Wagamamas. Around £15-£18 for a main course.