Or is this not how anyone does washing?!

[Sofiegiraffe]

Who is BU here, me or DP?

When I put a wash load in the machine, I pick up each item individually and sort of make a mental note of it so I have a rough idea of what is going into the machine (in case anyone asks where an item of their clothing is, or in case I'm wondering "where's that pair of black trousers of mine?", for example).

DP claims to just "pick up a load of stuff and shove it in". He doesn't put them in one by one. So if it's a darks wash that he's put on, and I ask "are my black trousers in that wash?" or "is DD's pink dress in that colours wash by any chance?", he won't know. All he knows is that he shoved a load of dark or coloured stuff in.

He thinks that's a perfectly reasonable way to do the washing. I think surely no one else does this? Surely most people look at what they're putting in so they at least have a rough idea of what's going in?!

Who is BU? Please settle this once and for all!

Hence why "looking in the washing basket" is a bigger task than people realise, I think. It involves going outside and down to the basement (not ideal with a baby especially as I have to duck as it's not even head height in places down there 😂). We also have several baskets - one upstairs, one downstairs, one in basement. So it's not as straightforward a task as just looking in one basket. We need to move house ... but that's a whole other story! 🙈

YANBU I also know what's in the washing machine at any given time, and generally what stage of washing/ drying most items are

@AllThatFancyPaintsAsFair - how does the 3hr eco wash actually work? Eg if I put a short 1 hour ‘speed perfect’ 40 degrees cycle on then surely I’m only using a third of the electricity I would do if I was using the 3 hour ‘eco perfect’ 40 degrees cycle? I’ve looked at the instructions for an explanation but they’re not really clear.

Yabvu, who has the time to faff around with that. If someone is looking for something, the answer should be if it's not in the cupboard, then it's in the wash. Job done. Why make such a chore of something?

I don't give any thought. Just bung it in

I'm a "pick up an armful and shove it in" type girl!

It's going to be in the machine, what? An hour and a half? Not a big deal.

I don't think I ever really check what I'm putting in.

Our laundry basket separates whites and darks.

We grab an armful of one or the other and put them in the washing machine. It'll be a mix of mine and dh's clothes, and when home from university also DD's will be in. Not everyone is an adult I also don't check pickets etc, nor do we check if stuff is suitable for a general wash - everyone knows to put delicates/wool etc separate.

Most additional sorting we might do is sort towels to wash separate to other stuff as they tend to go in a longer wash. Bedding is also done separately but that never gets out in the laundry basket anyway.

@DrFoxtrot

YANBU I also know what's in the washing machine at any given time, and generally what stage of washing/ drying most items are

Welcome, friend.

@Sofiegiraffe

Also our wash loads take 3 hours, not 1. Should this not be the case?!

A general 40 degree wash with fast spin takes just over 1 hour in our machine (about 7 years old.) A 60 degree hygiene wash takes just over 3 hours. A quick load at 30 degrees takes 20 minutes.

I don't have any cycles on my machine that takes 3 hours.

@Whatsmyname100

Yabvu, who has the time to faff around with that. If someone is looking for something, the answer should be if it's not in the cupboard, then it's in the wash. Job done. Why make such a chore of something?

Again. It doesn't take any extra time, it's an automatic process for me, and I find it eases my mental load and stress to know roughly where items are, and I don't need to go down to the basement to search in the basket... therefore it becomes less of a chore in the longer run for me.

No I don't think looking in the wash basket is that big of a task unless you make it one. We have several - there's a wash basket in each bedroom, one in each bathroom, one on the upstairs landing. Unless people are just flinging clothes everywhere there's only a couple of places to look for each person. For clean washing everyone has a pile. They take it upstairs and put it away - job done.

Keeping track of everyone's clothes is not my responsibility and I refuse to make it so.
If they need something specific they can look for themselves - as for when the kids were younger and unable to look, if I didn't know where something specific was I just dressed them in something else. I didn't think it had to be that difficult?

I quickly look at each item in order to sort it into colours, whites or darks, check for any obvious stains that might need treating and to make sure that my children have not left tissues or any obvious items in the pockets of items. I.also check the labels of certain clothes to make sure I wash them at the correct temperature. In doing do, I know what is in the wash, but it would not be my main reason for looking at the clothes.

There's only me so easier but I count everything in and out to make sure I do not miss socks etc. I have a set rota for washing so know exactly how many items are due for each wash.

In long term reduces number of washes and how many items of clothing I need.

No I don't think looking in the wash basket is that big of a task unless you make it one.

I assume your washing machine, washing basket / utility room etc are in the main body of your house, perhaps close to your kitchen, and not outside and under the house? For me, rather than just opening a utility room door and peering inside while baby is playing on the floor. I have to leave the back door and go completely out of sight. This means I either take her with me (nightmare if it's raining), or leave her in the house while I go down (which makes me uncomfortable). The ceiling is also low in places down there, meaning I have to duck (I'm quite tall), which is not the most convenient with a baby in arms.

So whilst you're correct that it's not akin to climbing Everest to check the basket, it's also not as simple as it could be if the set up of our house was different and more convenient (ie. a utility room accessible via the kitchen).

@Kurtanforpm

I think the assumption when people say they shove stuff into the machine is that these are previously sorted loads. Anything requiring special attention / whites etc have already been dealt with

Nope, not here. All just gets put in together. Darks/whites - never, ever separated them and all good. I don’t think I have ever looked at washing instructions on anything, it all just goes in on the one hour setting - I couldn’t even tell you what temperature that is.

Life’s too short to be sorting though washing or giving it too much thought.

That said, all our clothes are just cheap crap from supermarkets or or primark so nothing special.

And what do you do if you only have a couple of white things? Wait weeks for more white clothes or just wash two bits together?

If you only have a few white things, like my grandson's white school shirts, you give it to your mum (me!) and she washes them with her white load!

My grandson's polo shirts and proper shirts used to be chucked in with everything and used to go grey very quickly, and eventually my daughter got fed up with having to get new shirts, as they looked dreadful. Good old grandma!

@Sofiegiraffe

No I don't think looking in the wash basket is that big of a task unless you make it one.

I assume your washing machine, washing basket / utility room etc are in the main body of your house, perhaps close to your kitchen, and not outside and under the house? For me, rather than just opening a utility room door and peering inside while baby is playing on the floor. I have to leave the back door and go completely out of sight. This means I either take her with me (nightmare if it's raining), or leave her in the house while I go down (which makes me uncomfortable). The ceiling is also low in places down there, meaning I have to duck (I'm quite tall), which is not the most convenient with a baby in arms.

So whilst you're correct that it's not akin to climbing Everest to check the basket, it's also not as simple as it could be if the set up of our house was different and more convenient (ie. a utility room accessible via the kitchen).

You very much assume wrongly then.

As I said why is it automatically your responsibility to hunt for things and I don't get why you're hung up on knowing where specific items are. In a house with finite space they will turn up eventually.

For specific uniforms that are needed on specific days - both kids and DH know to put in the wash basket on the landing - their responsibility. If they don't then it's not down to me to track them down. People's clothes are their responsibility to track down. Other than uniformd if someone can't find something the response is "find it then or wear something else"

@Fandangofran

Ok you're not really understanding my point so we will just leave it there.

It's not knowing the whereabouts of my own items and the baby's that causes me the most stress, not anyone else's. If DP or eldest DD ask, I don't feel it's my responsibility to know. If I don't know then I don't know.

But if I don't know where my stuff and the baby's is, no one else will care. So that's my problem and mine alone.

Modern machines are made to have long eco programmes, it's normal not something wrong with the machine smile

My eco programme takes even longer than that but also has programmes that take a shorter time. It's not fancy enough to weigh the washing but like a dishwasher you can choose a longer wash to save water and electricty

I'm sure you must have heard the analogy of driving 100 miles in 3rd gear at 90 mph versus a steady fuel efficient 5th gear mid speed. Both get you to the same place but the latter takes much less petrol

@AllThatFancyPaintsAsFair I can't quote you sorry.
Yes that was my point. Everyone upthread has been saying to OP "how come your washing takes 3 hours" and she's been surprised there's a quicker option, which sounds like it would really help given the amount of laundry the family is doing (6 work trousers a week for DH wow!) So they're either uunintentionally running the machine in eco mode or overloading the machine on a normal wash for it to take so long.
Given how many laundry loads they seem to need to do a week, cutting the time in half could really help (even if it would use more electricity). At least she can be aware of her options then - faster, more expensive, or slower, cheaper.

Perhaps I should have included in my OP that out washing machine and basket are in the basement only accessible by leaving the house. Might have made it easier to understand why things end up "lost" down there 😂

@Cavagirl

Yes we seem to end up with a LOT of washing. DP is in an job where uniform needs washing after every shift for hygiene reasons, hence he ends up with so many pairs of trousers needing washed per week. Baby obviously generates a lot of washing with things getting dirty regularly. So it does feel like a bloody never ending pile.

It's not knowing the whereabouts of my own items and the baby's that causes me the most stress, not anyone else's.

Our system is that a load of washing gets put on as soon as there is enough for a load (sorted by lights and darks). So if the washing machine is on with a dark load, then, if your dark item of clothing was previously placed in the washing basket, it's now in the washing machine. If your light item of washing was placed in the washing basket, it will still be there (until there is enough enough for a lights load and then it will get washed).

Sorry, I’m not trying to give you a hard time but I think you will have to explain having a washing basket in the basement.

@ManyATime

Sorry, I’m not trying to give you a hard time but I think you will have to explain having a washing basket in the basement.

Yes, I should have explained this! It might have saved pages and pages of "what's the problem, just look in the basket". 🙈

@RedskyThisNight

It's not knowing the whereabouts of my own items and the baby's that causes me the most stress, not anyone else's.

Our system is that a load of washing gets put on as soon as there is enough for a load (sorted by lights and darks). So if the washing machine is on with a dark load, then, if your dark item of clothing was previously placed in the washing basket, it's now in the washing machine. If your light item of washing was placed in the washing basket, it will still be there (until there is enough enough for a lights load and then it will get washed).

Yes. Our system is the same.

But when I'm not the one to load the machine, my question to the person who did is "was x item in that load?" (as opposed to still in the basket waiting to be washed). This is information that would help me to decide my next steps, which are to either 1) forget about it, it's in hand and just needs taking out and drying in a few hours, or 2) add it to my mental to do list to put that in the wash in a few hours, otherwise it won't get washed.

I need to know if it's 1 or 2. That's my point.

And yes. I could absolutely just not bother asking DP, and go down to the basement myself (putting baby in her pen or taking her with me), and rifle through the basket for the item I'm wondering about to check its whereabouts. But given the logistics of this, it would help me immensely if DP knew if he'd added it to the wash or not. Hence my asking him.