Page 2 | What age is it ok to have kids at home when WFH

Burnt0utMum · 2022-04-15T06:15:15+00:00

What age would you say it's ok to have kids at home whilst you're working from home? Or does it vary based on the child? Should it be ok as long as it's not affecting your work or should there be some sort of ban?

Bagelsandbrie · 15/04/2022 08:13

I think secondary age is a minimum. Younger than that and I think it’s a bit sad as well really. They need parental company and input and it’s a bit lonely for them to have to amuse themselves for long periods of time.

TokyoSushi · 15/04/2022 08:15

Mine are almost 9 & 11 and are absolutely fine. I try not to do it very often though as it's a pretty boring day for them.

Fashionesta · 15/04/2022 08:17

DD is 9 and can do the odd day although it would involve a lot of screen time. If I'm in a meeting I shut my door and tell her she must not come in and usually it works.

I definitely get less work done when she is home so not a sustainable long term solution but absolutely fine the odd day as my job is fairly flexible.

Sorry but people who say they can work from home with a three year old, what work do you do? It only takes DD calling out to me to make me lose the thread of what I'm doing eg numbers or spreadsheets.

notanothertakeaway · 15/04/2022 08:20

@Username917778

Depends on the job and child surely. I can work with my 3 year old at home with me.

This would suggest to me that either (1) work or (2) child isn't getting full attention

fairylightsandwaxmelts · 15/04/2022 08:23

That depends entirely on the job (not all jobs involve phones, meetings and other people, or urgent deadlines) and the child.

Not everyone who WFH has an office job that involves being present all the time - lots of people can work around their children and finish work up in the evenings or early mornings without it being any kind of issue.

The home-based part of my business could easily be done with children around - I can do it whenever I fancy each day so if DC were being disruptive I could just stop and finish it when they were in bed. Doing so would have no impact on the quality of the work or my clients so it would be fine.

MarriedThreeChildren · 15/04/2022 08:24

I depends on the child tbh.

Some are very self sufficient and will play in their own/get a snack etc… from an earlier age than other. Mines were ok from around Y4 (Y5 definitively)

I think having one child makes it easier. With my dcs thé issue would have been them falling out rather than not being able to entertain themselves.

HaveringWavering · 15/04/2022 08:26

@Username917778

Depends on the job and child surely. I can work with my 3 year old at home with me.

I’d be really surprised if your employer agreed with that statement.

Clymene · 15/04/2022 08:28

@fairylightsandwaxmelts

That depends entirely on the job (not all jobs involve phones, meetings and other people, or urgent deadlines) and the child.

Not everyone who WFH has an office job that involves being present all the time - lots of people can work around their children and finish work up in the evenings or early mornings without it being any kind of issue.

The home-based part of my business could easily be done with children around - I can do it whenever I fancy each day so if DC were being disruptive I could just stop and finish it when they were in bed. Doing so would have no impact on the quality of the work or my clients so it would be fine.

Then you're not working are you? You're working when you're not looking after your children. That isn't what the OP is asking

Jules912 · 15/04/2022 08:29

I can with my 9 year old but he'd spend a lot of time on screens so generally only do when his ill. It is impossible to work with my 6 year old at home unless someone else is looking after her or she's ill enough to be mostly sleeping.

MarriedThreeChildren · 15/04/2022 08:30

Secondary age children ought to be able to go back home on their own. They are supposed ot be able to spend all day at home on their own during the school holiday.

So yes a Y7 child should be able to look after themselves at the end of the day whilst their parent works. It seems obvious to me.

Y6 children are expected to start making their own way back home and wait at home on their own as a preparation to secondary school. Seeing that the child will not be on their own, id say a Y6 child should have no issue with that.

Earlier on and yes it will depend on the child but for me. If you are talking about 1h30 on their ‘own’ having a snack and watching TV, I can’t see it being an issue with a Y4 child really

Dinoteeth · 15/04/2022 08:31

I'd say 8+ but it also depends.

My older child is capable of walking to friends and playing out. So really just needs someone in the house to keep an eye on him. And understands not to interrupt.

LO is only 5, so still too small to play out unsupervised, doesn't get that he can't just interrupt meetings and stuff. Had chicken pox a few weeks ago resulting in him having to be home with us. I was glad to see him back in school.

There is definitely a period of time when they are fine and will entertain themselves need minimum supervision but still need someone around.

Timeforabiscuit · 15/04/2022 08:32

This is why working for a family friendly employer is so important, you can be comfortable having an open discussion with your employer about what's workable.

Let's face it, costs are astronomical at the moment, and good workers are in demand - so voting with my feet if its not working is in the employees corner at the moment - god knows it will change back to the employer soon enough.

Figgygal · 15/04/2022 08:36

My 5 yo and 10 yo come home after school while i wfh once a week they watch a film with snacks 3.30-5 works fine but dont want to do it more than that
The go to holiday clubs in holidays or grandparents when we not on leave otherwise i feel im neglecting them as they go square eyed in front of tv and i can't fully focus on work

Whatafustercluck · 15/04/2022 08:37

11yo ds was at home with me yesterday wfh and I barely knew he was here. He's been pretty self sufficient since the pandemic, for obvious reasons as dh and I were often on back to back calls. So probably since 9, although he needed our intervention on his school work when we were able to. Comfortably from 10yo. But he's a pretty mature, sensible boy.

Lndnmummy · 15/04/2022 08:38

Ds1 is 10 and I can work with him at home but it is boring for him and he'd spend the entire day on screens. On school holidays etc he prefers clubs as he enjoys them. My little one is nearly 4 and I can't work with him at home. I'd never even contemplate it.

thesparkthatbled · 15/04/2022 08:40

Totally depends on the child. I could work much better at home with my youngest (8) as she will play happily in her room for hours, whereas my eldest (10) is wont to mincing around declaring that there's nothing to do...

SnowingInApril · 15/04/2022 08:59

@Username917778

Depends on the job and child surely. I can work with my 3 year old at home with me.

Doesn’t a 3yr old need constant supervision? Mine have. No way I could have worked with mine at home. Even if they had been perfectly behaved the entire time, they still need stimulating activities and engagement.

Flickflak · 15/04/2022 09:00

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Fifipop185 · 15/04/2022 09:00

Very much depends on the child and your employer.

My DS has SEN and is 14 and is always home in school holidays and for 2 hours after school. He can entertain himself for a while but usually puts in an appearance to most of my video calls with my team and managers. They are all kind to him and once he has been acknowledged he leaves my office.

My employer is very flexible and supportive and I have worked for them for 5 years now, the last 2 have been from home, and our contracts have been redrawn so we are forever wfh. I couldn't work for someone who didn't understand DS's needs and my situation.

I think my employer would be happy with the same set up if DS was younger, maybe 7/8, but I don't think they would be so accommodating if he was much younger than that.

JamSandwich89 · 15/04/2022 09:09

Just to say, since COVID restrictions started being relaxed for my work if any of us want to WFH for even part of the week we have to sign contract updates that included a part about how we will have no caring responsibilities during work hours. This is the same for any of my other normally office job friends who are part/totally WFH now. Just letting you know in case you're doing some sort of forward planning but not checked this with your work yet

fairylightsandwaxmelts · 15/04/2022 09:13

@Clymene you missed part of my post.

Which is that my job can easily be done with children around and I could sit and work with them playing in the same room - but my job isn't time-sensitive so if they needed me, it wouldn't matter if I had to stop work for a while to sort them out.

Whereas other jobs require you to be "on" all the time and therefore you couldn't stop for even five minutes to help one make a snack or something.

So yes, I could work with children around and have done so when looking after my niece. My point is that not everyone works a time sensitive office job so many people can "work" a 9-5 day with DC and if they don't get it all done by 5pm, it doesn't matter if they do a bit more work in the evening to finish off.

They're still working with DC around even if their entire working day isn't spent working!

maddening · 15/04/2022 09:13

My ds was 9 at start of lockdown and has been fine while wfh, but we only have 1 dc so I can imagine that it is harder when you have more than 1 and they can rile each other up. But ds has been fine to entertain himself when we are wfh.

TheKeatingFive · 15/04/2022 09:16

From a managers POV, I'd make secondary school a cut off. Too much variation in circumstances before that and some parents will always push the boundaries.

You simply can't work with 3/5 year olds at home, it isn't fair to anyone.

SarahAndQuack · 15/04/2022 09:17

Depends entirely on the child and the job.

I've worked from home with DD at any age from pretty much newborn, but what I was doing was one of those jobs where I'm paid to get it done properly, not for how long it takes, so it was my business if I did it slowly with interruptions.

DP currently works at home with DD aged 5, not every day but a few whole days during school holidays, or a couple of hours after school 2/3 days in a normal week. It works fine, but, again, her work knows DD is there and the onus is on her to finish the task on time.

DD is pretty good at knowing when we're working and not interrupting. But neither of us do jobs that couldn't be interrupted.

MajorCarolDanvers · 15/04/2022 09:17

When they are old enough to entertain themselves / go out to play.

Primary school age