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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My word should have been enough

341 replies

EthelsAuntie · 07/04/2022 09:37

A couple of weeks ago, I was admitted to hospital. I had severe abdominal pain, no appetite, being violently sick, couldnt even keep water down. I hadn't been to the toilet for a wee or a poo for at least 24hrs.
The dr wanted to send me for an x-ray of my tummy but wouldn't send me until I got a confirmed negative on a pregnancy test.
I repeatedly told them that I wasn't pregnant. I knew that I wasn't pregnant. However because I'm married they said they needed to do the test. This seriously held up proceedings. They had to put me on a drip. They probably would have done that anyway. But they had to wait for hours until I was able to go for a wee. Then they did a test on it and only then did they request the X-ray because lo behold I was not pregnant.
It turned out to be extremely serious and I needed emergency surgery that took 5 hours.
AIBU to have felt very strongly that they should have taken my word for it. Make me sign something to say that I wasn't pregnant. Fine. Don't just dismiss me because I'm of childbearing age.
I also wonder what would have happened had I been pregnant. Neither I nor a fetus would have survived what the actual problem was had it been left untreated.
It was an awful time and I have to say the constant asking and not taking my word for it did not help. I was feeling like shit. I am a strong, intelligent woman in my 40s but I felt I didn't have a voice to be listened to.

OP posts:
BoristalkedaboutBruno22 · 07/04/2022 10:37

The doctors were doing their job. Let it go and be grateful you had the treatment you needed.

BatshitCrazyWoman · 07/04/2022 10:38

@steff13

It's standard when you're having an x-ray to do a pregnancy test. If it took hours for you to be able to go, I'm surprised they didn't offer to catheterize you.
I've just got back from the hospital after having an x-ray. I did not have a pregnancy test before it! There are signs up in the radiology department that say if you are female and could be pregnant to tell the radiographer, but no forcing you to pee on a stick.
MrsPetty · 07/04/2022 10:41

@SolasAnla Pregnant while Christian and sexually abstinent? How?

RedskyThisNight · 07/04/2022 10:42

They did stop short of an actual pregnant test, but 15 year old DD (who has never had sex) was absolutely cross examined about could she be pregnant, when was her last period, was it normal for her periods to be irregular etc. I remember thinking at the time that they should have just accepted her "no" to the "could you be pregnant" question and that the follow up questions were very obtrusive. I guess it's one of those situations where medical professionals are damned if they do and damned if they don't.

SolasAnla · 07/04/2022 10:42

@Brefugee

I think they need to do their check, I’m sorry, sadly women saying they are absolutely not pregnant when they are is not uncommon and they would be negligent not to check.

how about believing women. Why don't they instead ask when the last time they had PIV sex was? or any other way of getting pregnant rather than assuming that all married women have sex?

Do they ask single women? to they guess how old you are or ask if you have had the menopause? The only really good question is: is there a chance at all that you could be pregnant? Then you sign consent forms.

One of the reason that all patients are asked to give a medical history multiple times is that they dont see the medical reason to disclose something.

Asking a woman on birth control if there is a chance she may be pregnant and she says no has minimum medical diagnostic value when there is an test which can be produced as evidence in a Court.

Original poster
EthelsAuntie · 07/04/2022 10:43

I kept telling them about my hysterectomy. Told them to look in my notes. It would have all been there. Still the procedure is that women of child bearing age need a negative result.

I understand that people could be mistaken, that contraception could fail etc. But it still seems to me that a blanket rule is unnecessary.

I will accept that I am being unreasonable but I will move on and focus on getting better now.

OP posts:
Pyewhacket · 07/04/2022 10:43

I have helped deliver a baby to a woman who swore blind she wasn't pregnant. And she was quite agressive about it.

It's also Trust Policy to prevent being sued.

ikeepseeingit · 07/04/2022 10:44

If OP was unable to wee for five hours why were they not catheterising her? Or doing a blood test? It makes no sense to me why they waited so long for something life threatening. Get well soon OP x

SolasAnla · 07/04/2022 10:44

[quote MrsPetty]@SolasAnla Pregnant while Christian and sexually abstinent? How?[/quote]
@MrsPetty

Mary was a single mother.
Jesus had a stepdad.

Slushynana · 07/04/2022 10:44

I have a much loved 6 year old grandson because my sons partner had a pregnancy test before a gynae op. She was 40, was told she would never have children, he is our miracle.

WeAreTheHeroes · 07/04/2022 10:47

@SolasAnla - are you being sarcastic? Let's face it, before the OP had posted she'd had a hysterectomy, how do you know whether she is actually sexually active?

justfiveminutes · 07/04/2022 10:48

It's national guidance so they did the right thing.

I know you are affronted about it but I guess they'd rather test everyone than make judgment calls about whether someone looks like a liar, or looks too thick to know whether they're pregnant or not, in a sensitive, medical situation.

MojoJojo71 · 07/04/2022 10:49

It’s not standard procedure to do a pregnancy test before an X ray. I’ve had multiple x rays without tests and work in a radiology dept (sonographer not radiographer). It is standard to ask the question but if the answer is ‘there is no chance I could be pregnant’ then that should be enough.

longtompot · 07/04/2022 10:50

You've had a hysterectomy and they still wanted you to do a test! Yanbu in that case.

The amount of times my dd was asked if she might be pregnant before various ops and procedures. She was so embarrassed the first time as I think she was only 14 or thereabouts. Plus at was in the room

Soubriquet · 07/04/2022 10:50

Did someone seriously say about Mary in this day and age?

Ridiculous

Phobiaphobic · 07/04/2022 10:51

Given that men can give birth now, are they going to insist any man with abdominal pain has to do a pregnancy test too? Or will they take his word for it because he's a man.

SolasAnla · 07/04/2022 10:51

@EthelsAuntie

A couple of weeks ago, I was admitted to hospital. I had severe abdominal pain, no appetite, being violently sick, couldnt even keep water down. I hadn't been to the toilet for a wee or a poo for at least 24hrs. The dr wanted to send me for an x-ray of my tummy but wouldn't send me until I got a confirmed negative on a pregnancy test. I repeatedly told them that I wasn't pregnant. I knew that I wasn't pregnant. However because I'm married they said they needed to do the test. This seriously held up proceedings. They had to put me on a drip. They probably would have done that anyway. But they had to wait for hours until I was able to go for a wee. Then they did a test on it and only then did they request the X-ray because lo behold I was not pregnant. It turned out to be extremely serious and I needed emergency surgery that took 5 hours. AIBU to have felt very strongly that they should have taken my word for it. Make me sign something to say that I wasn't pregnant. Fine. Don't just dismiss me because I'm of childbearing age. I also wonder what would have happened had I been pregnant. Neither I nor a fetus would have survived what the actual problem was had it been left untreated. It was an awful time and I have to say the constant asking and not taking my word for it did not help. I was feeling like shit. I am a strong, intelligent woman in my 40s but I felt I didn't have a voice to be listened to.
So by your second post you realised that you had forgotten about disclosing your prior medical history.

See ⬆️ is proof positive that doctors have to make medical judgements to do clinical tests rather than relying on the patient self-diagnosis

justfiveminutes · 07/04/2022 10:52

@MojoJojo71

It’s not standard procedure to do a pregnancy test before an X ray. I’ve had multiple x rays without tests and work in a radiology dept (sonographer not radiographer). It is standard to ask the question but if the answer is ‘there is no chance I could be pregnant’ then that should be enough.
National guidance is to test anyone 12-55. But it is just guidance. I guess individual hospitals or trusts will interpret and implement it differently.
MrsPetty · 07/04/2022 10:53

@SolasAnla 😂 wow! I never even considered immaculate conceptions! The doctor was dead right to hold out for the test 😂

Kennykenkencat · 07/04/2022 10:54

The more I hear about hospitals and healthcare the more I wonder about the medical education doctors and nurses get to qualify as someone who is supposed to know about basic biology.

Given the seriousness of the operation whether op was pregnant or not that pregnancy wasn’t going to survive the operation and without the operation op wasn’t going to survive.

It does seem a complete waste of time and money insisting on a pregnancy test.

But there again it is the NHS and they are really good at wasting time and money.

Original poster
EthelsAuntie · 07/04/2022 10:55

@SolasAnla no, I told the doctor. I didn't tell a public forum on the internet.

OP posts:
Indicatrice · 07/04/2022 10:56

YANBU, it’s another case of a foetus being prioritised over a woman.

Please complain.

Original poster
EthelsAuntie · 07/04/2022 10:56

@Phobiaphobic

Given that men can give birth now, are they going to insist any man with abdominal pain has to do a pregnancy test too? Or will they take his word for it because he's a man.
Exactly.
OP posts:
Kennykenkencat · 07/04/2022 10:57

@Phobiaphobic

Given that men can give birth now, are they going to insist any man with abdominal pain has to do a pregnancy test too? Or will they take his word for it because he's a man.
Apparently I read somewhere that one hospital does ask men if they are pregnant

Also men cannot get pregnant. It is biologically impossible.

dworky · 07/04/2022 10:58

Because you're married? Grin
Single women never have sex!

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