When men say "I prefer women without make-up"...

[ThingThatIBring]

AIBU to think that when men say "I prefer women without make-up" that they don't usually know what they're talking about (and don't usually have a clue that women ARE wearing it)?

The reality of this statement is usually:

• I don't like it when women wear really obvious MAKE-UP make-up (loads of lippy and false eyelashes etc) or when it's badly applied (making it obvious);
• I like really good-looking fresh-faced young women whose complexions, etc., look smooth without it;
• I like to think of myself as very wholesome (and maybe a bit of a feminist).

What they DON'T mean (but don't realise they don't mean) is:

• I prefer the look of the average woman of my own age without any make-up on.

I know so many men who say this, and it always mildly irritates me as it's said like it's a kind of virtue.

As a post-mating-phase human, it's not like it really affects my life. But it always makes me feel for all the women who are still in a position where they're affected by this nonsense...

Sleep is the best makeup

@PaterPower

DP very rarely wears makeup (to the point it’s almost jarring when she does) so I know exactly what “no makeup” looks like - at least on her. TBH, on most work mornings she won’t even bother with a hairbrush.

It’s never worried me (I genuinely prefer her natural look) which is just as well, as she’d tell me to fuck off three different ways to Sunday if I so much as hinted that she’d look better with some on (she wouldn’t).

Unless they end up living with someone channelling Dolly Parton, I don’t think many men would “never” have seen their partner bare-faced at some point in their relationship.

Do not diss Dolly. She’s awesome.

Yes it's a lot of nonsense. Most men (and some women) have no idea about (relatively subtle) make up. I find it annoying and i couldn't give a rat's arse what men think about the way I (or other women) look.

@JulieBeds you absolute legend

Every man in the planet has said this to me and yes it's really irritating. My husband doesn't say it any more . I think he's worked out this is in fact not what he prefers

DH loathes lipstick and face makeup but really likes a bit of mascara and eyeliner. I expect a lot of men feel that way.

Saw a beautiful teen (family friend) yesterday that I hadn’t seen for a while. She used to look stunning. Now she has fake eyelashes on, mascara in her eyebrows (wtf) and thick fake tan. She looked awful. ☹️ I think men mean please don’t do that!!

Some men are thick when it comes to make up or the 'lack of' look.
But we all have our preferences---I can't stand the TOWIE/Made in Chelsea look.
Guy with uber-waxed eyebrows and skinny jeans makes me want to vom!

My response is, "why are you telling me this?"

Going through the thread backwards and just encountered this remark: absolutely brilliantly withering, and I am storing it up for future use.

Tbh if theyre anything like my other half they wouldn't bloody notice.

I don't wear make up often but last time I did I came out the bathroom fully made up but not dressed and he asked why I hadn't started getting ready yet 😂😂😂

Yes i agree. They mean they want a naturally beautiful woman without obvious make up such as heavy eye and lip colour.

My partner does say this - I usually go make up free most of the time now, only wear it when I fancy and I know he means it as a "you are beautiful without makeup" type compliment but equally, he doesn't understand filters or when women are wearing subtle makeup so he would probably say that about a celeb who had just done a "natural job"

Do not diss Dolly. She’s awesome.

You’ll get no argument from me there! Her drive, her music, her charity work - she’s an inspiration. But I still find it a bit… unusual… that she has NEVER let her husband see her without full makeup and a wig. She wears it all to bed.

Im not very good at spotting natural look make up because I dont wear it myself. So I am surprised sometimes when i see friends un made up. My big thing being i forget not everyone has dark eyelashes.i cant imagine most men are better than me..

I'm 52 and don't wear any face make up to smooth out my (apparantly!) elderly unglowy skin, always bare faced, except for mascara and lip gloss. Men have said this to me, and I've assumed they were sincere, given they were correct. Very presumptious of them, given I have no interest in where I am on their preference scale, but sincere nonetheless.

The only appropriate response to this statement is “Who the fuck asked you
Agree, I've been known to say "I dont think she (whatever woman is being talked about) cares what you think. So stfu.

I remember reading this some years ago (also referencing the brilliant Amy Schumer sketch....)
www.salihughesbeauty.com/features/girl-dont-need-makeup/

I think men don't like the trickery either.

It's makeup, not an investment scam.

I see it as a red flag when men talk like this.

I have worked with a man who always said this. I was in a phase in my life where I lived in metallic eyeliner and varying dramatic lipstick shades. One day I had had enough of his "I love women without makeup, why do you bother, you're hot, you women don't need it!" I snapped "Right, so you think I should change the way I prefer to look in order to satisfy the preferences you have for my own face?" He looked as if I'd smacked him straight in the chops. Absolute shock and outrage. Countered with "it doesn't matter what your face looks like if you're a bitch, Kyiv."
🙄

I mean… I’m not very interested in what kind of woman any man likes (unless it’s my husband and sometimes not then! ). If someone were to tell me what they find attractive in women I’d treat it as a non sequitur at best, creepy at worst. Unless we were already discussing it, unlikely.

Just to add, men may be a lot of things, but it's a bit of a stretch to suggest they can't tell when a woman has make up on. They don't have to be clever or 'understand' make up to see it with their own eyes. No matter how well applied, foundation is always visible, mascara can be seen on the lashes and eye make up is clearly, well...there. If a man gets close enough even the stupidest of them will know whether you're wearing it or not.

If a man gets close enough even the stupidest of them will know whether you're wearing it or not.

You would be surprised.

I tHibk some men say this meaning if someone has heavy make up on badly applied
I rarely wear make up unless going out out as I have always been this way
Late 40's so prob should now though but dh never comments one way or other

My first bf said that to me, then he didn’t like me in jeans, then only dresses but not too short. He pulled a face when I had my hair cut short.
Even at 19 I thought “naaaah”

@JulieBeds. Top rant and pretty spot on (the male related bits anyway).

I'm mixed about YouTube to be honest. I hated the unethical way it lured my daughter into buying shit tonnes of uber expensive makeup, but she learnt some unbelievable skills.

Personally I prefer less makeup but purely for financial reasons as it seems just another thing to prise large sums of money from people.

@Terfydactyl

The only appropriate response to this statement is “Who the fuck asked you Agree, I've been known to say "I dont think she (whatever woman is being talked about) cares what you think. So stfu.

Or the MN "Thank you for your opinion, random man".