Friend says I’m just in the honeymoon period AIBU

[Salmabub]

DP and I are in our late 30s and have been together for around a year and a half. We moved in together just before our 1 year ‘anniversary’. Prior to meeting one another we’d both had numerous long term relationships and had both been married, so by the time we met we both knew exactly what we did and didn’t want from a partner/relationship.

We both feel that the relationship is genuinely like a breath of fresh air and completely different to any relationship either of us have been in before. We don’t argue, but calmly talk through any rare disagreement we have and appreciate and understand each others point of view. Everything house work related is shared evenly with no complaints or nagging, we respect and support each other with everything and most importantly we just love each other’s company and being around one another.

Caught up with a friend for a coffee the other day and she had asked about the relationship, so I’d essentially told her the above. Father than be happy for me, my friend claimed that all relationships are this easy at the start and I’m just in the honeymoon period, soon it’ll be boring and stagnant and the arguments will begin. In my experience, I’ve always started to see the negative traits in partners by at least 6-12 months and various red flags, so I feel any major issues would have already presented themselves by now. Friend says I’m deluded! AIBU?! Would be interested to know how long your “honeymoon period” lasted, or did it never finish?!

You and your partner just share the same values - sounds like she is projecting her problems.

Of course she's jealous! And she should be reminded of the 'things you think but do not say' because everyone should be left to enjoy when things are going well and not be told theyll change (when my kids were babies I had a few experiences of women telling me when they grew up there wouldn't be all the smiles etc'!! Of course it's the honeymoon period OP (our first arguments didn't come up until we were together about ten years and were health and money related) and may it last for the rest of your lives!!! (Also hopefully your friend is ok and nothing is up with her)

She's measuring your relationship on her experience which is not necessarily how life is.
Our relationship is identical to yours, 16 years together and 10 years married.
Keep enjoying and appreciating each other.

She sounds jealous. Your relationship sounds great, and way beyond the honeymoon period.
However, for it to truly pass the test of time, you'll have to see how things go when dealing with serious crisis, like ill health, unemployment, etc. These big traumatic life events are the real test.
But enjoy your smooth sailing healthy relationship in the mean time ☺

Honestly, I think she's projecting. She may be jealous or maybe is/was going through her own shite so she tries to 'warn' you but sounds like a pure projecting and nothing else. We are still in our 'honeymoon phase' with flowers and cheesy Sartshow 3d romantic videos for anniversaries 7 years later which I know is not a lot but still says something. There will be ups and downs but I don't think staying interested and romentic to each other is such an uncommon thing to claim it's going to end soon and just you wait and etc.

I'd also revise this friendship tbh.

Miserable woman. Have coffee with someone else.

Your friend sounds jealous. I've been with my DH for ten years, married for nearly six, and still talk calmly through issues share the load and have the most amazing sex.- and we've had to battle through losing our baby son, the death of my young sibling and nearly becoming homeless - just because times get tough doesn't mean you can't work on it and nurture your relationship. To this day I'm still thankful to wake up with him every morning.
Maybe she's settled and she's unhappy, but it absolutely doesn't mean this is what lies ahead for you both!

18 months is still the honeymoon period IMO. You’re still getting to know each other and probably haven’t seen each other at their worst/most stressed/going through trauma etc.

Give it 5 years and you’ll know each other far better, it doesn’t mean you won’t get on or love each other just that until you go through certain experiences together it’s easy to think you always get on.

Having kids is a big change and adjustment, maybe that’s what she means, that until you have a baby or live together a few years you don’t know each other as deeply?