My child has been ill for a year and no one will help

[SickySickSick]

Name change because I’ve talked this through with friends/family

I have a three year old. For the last year, she has been ill with multiple chest infections, conjunctivitis, tonsillitis, ear infections and now a skin infection. She’s had antibiotics 10 times over the last 12 months, sometimes several courses to clear the issue. In between the infections, she regularly gets viral tonsillitis and viruses meaning she coughs until she throws up every few weeks. We’ve not had more than two weeks without her being ill since last summer. I’ve started taking her to see a doctor even when it is viral (only difference I can tell is no temperature) because I want it logged by them that she’s ill. Again. The problem is that we see a different doctor every time, and even though I say she’s been ill a lot recently, they seem to just nod and ignore it.

So am I overreacting? Is this just normal three year old at nursery sickness, or should I start trying to push for more investigations into why she is getting so many infections so frequently?

YABU- it’s normal, calm down and leave the doctors alone
YANBU- listen to your instincts and push the doctor for more help

OP I’m so sorry!!

I am no expert but from people I know:

• one had a child who was constantly ill. Child turned out to be anemic. So maybe try iron supplements?!

• one had a child who had tonsillitis every couple of months. The NHS guidelines didn’t recommend tonsil removal, but when they had this done privately the child’s overall health dramatically improved and the NHS doctor said they were so happy it was done and that they wished the NHS guidelines weren’t all about budget 😭 so maybe consider that. Push for answers about a tonsillectomy and consider going privately if the NHS won’t help.

That is a LOT of antibiotics which will have damaged the child’s gut flora which in turn can weaken the immune system. Try giving age-appropriate probiotic supplements like actimel.

Keep your own summary record of dates and illnesses and when you visit the GP take a copy with you and say “I am concerned, this is not normal, is there a paediatrician you can refer me to?”

There is a load of really alarmist and inaccurate advice on this thread. The average child has 10-12 upper respiratory tract infections (colds/sore throats/coughs) during the first year they are in a group setting - daycare, Reception etc. So, in terms of the number of infections, this all sounds totally normal.
I disagree. I have two boys and one of them was constantly ill to where it had a terrible impact on him. Completely different from the usual colds, etc. that DS2 got.

@MissLucyEyelesbarrow
Have they changed the guidelines from 7 documented cases of tonsillitis in 1 year or 5 a year for 2 years or 3 a year for 3 years?

DS2 met all 3 criteria by the time his tonsils came out aged 3.

Children do have lots of infections are your child's age. I just wanted to say that viruses do cause high temperatures, I don't know why you thought otherwise. Think about it, a cold is a virus but you get hot and cold. A virus goes without medication apart from anti-pyretics and pain killers when needed; a bacterial infection will persist and become worse.

@SickySickSick

Thanks everyone, I’ll push for an ENT referral and google adenoids!

I think we’ve been given so many antibiotics because we’ve seen so many different doctors! Some have even prescribed them without seeing her, I describe her symptoms over the phone and they write one out. I even had a doctor write one out recently because it was a Friday and she said I could put the prescription in over the weekend ‘if I needed it’ luckily she got better so I didn’t need it!

For those suggesting it, her bed is permanently lifted with books so she can’t slouch down. We have the calpol plug in and I bathe her with olbus oil in her bath at bedtime. She has vicks on her chest, back and feet. This is just at the moment because she has the cough again and has already thrown up twice.

@watingroom2 we actually spend tons of time outside because we live rurally and have lots of animals to deal with so I’d be shocked if she was

Does she always seem to have a cold? Runny nose, chesty cough, snoring?

Just really does sound like silent reflux alongside her tonsils. When DD is ill it makes her reflux worse which in turn irritates all her sinuses so she gets a runny nose, ear infection, conjunctivitis, tonsillitis and throws up all because her reflux is poorly managed.

I don't even bother to ask anymore, we phone 111 or the GP and a prescription is waiting at boots for us the next day. I mentioned antibiotic resistance concerns to the ENT specialist and he said don't worry not as big a thing as everyone makes out 🙄

I can’t believe you’ve given her antiobiitocs 10 times. You’ve killed here gut bacteria no wonder she has been sick. Every time you give her those you make her weaker because you’re killing her gut bacteria and breading harmful ones and making her immune system weaker.

Haven't read the thread but I'm sure you've gotten good advice/ideas. On the off chance that your child has the same condition as mine, thought I'd mention that we went throught this with DD for years. Turns out it was celiac disease. She did not have any of the 'usual' symptoms of celiac, she was just a very ill child all the time. She finally had a blood test that showed she was gluten intolerant (TTG, I believe it was called) and then the biopsy that showed she had celiac.

Once she cut out gluten all the many illnesses stopped. However, don't stop feeding gluten unless you have had a gluten intolerance test for two reasons. First, you must be eating gluten for the test to show its results. Second, there is dispute in the medical community that withholding gluten without cause may not be entirely healthy. (Third, it's a PITA to deal with if you don't need to).

Good luck OP and don't give up. It took us years for the Drs to sort our DD's health. We had to deal with each illness each time, and they wouldn't look for a bigger cause for a long time. But once we got there it was worth the fight. I hope you get some answers soon

My DS was like that up to 5 years of age then his immunity kinda matured and was hardly ill after that. We were admitted in hospital a lot between 2 and 4. He just had low immunity.

I pushed for referral with 4yo and consultant took one look at tonsils, said nope and whipped them out along with adenoids and put in grommets. Never looked back. You have to push for everything now. The NHS is in a right two and eight.

Hello OP,
My daughter had bronchitis, ear infections, and a sticky eye. The ENT doctor found that she had enlarged polyps, which affected fluids draining away. After they were removed, when she was 2 or 3 she was okay.
Hope it goes well at the doctors.

Kids are sick a lot when young especially when going to nursery but that sounds excessive

Push for blood tests to rule anything more serious out.

Also dettol spray at home each night. I know it sounds crazy but when my DS started nursery we were horribly sick off and on for about 6 months! It was awful, I honestly thought I was going to be sacked because of how much time I had to take off! I got the dettol can spray and used it on the way up to bed, sofas, doors, handles, stair rails, toilet flush/seat and I honestly think it made a difference.

Good luck,I hope its sorted soon x

The average child has 10-12 upper respiratory tract infections (colds/sore throats/coughs) during the first year they are in a group setting - daycare, Reception etc. So, in terms of the number of infections, this all sounds totally normal.

The average child has this number of colds and coughs and minor things, yes, perhaps.

But 10 infections necessitating antibiotics a year?!

Come on, THAT’S not normal.

Oh my gosh, I think I am you, except my dd is 2.5.

Where are you based? I ask because I was so worried I went through all the private channels suggested. Private ENT-nothing no adenoids, glue ear though, private gastro- nothing. She’s had 3 blood tests and all normal.
I’m not sure if I should push more or for what. We’re going to do private allergy testing just in case.

My daughter fell down into faltering growth because of it. We spoke to a dietitian and she did say it’s becoming quite common post covid, due to lockdown and everyones immune system going down and then nursery in general.

But definitely get a FBC test just to be sure.

Both of mine have caught bronchilloitis in the early months of life and apparently that renders certain children more susceptible to chest infections.

Hugs to you OP, it’s so hard, we’re on week 3 of diarrhoea and no GP will even see us

Sounds normal 2 me. My DC1 aged 3 has had 2 x croup. 2 chest infections, conjunctivitis, covid and a few viruses.age is getting something every other week. This is just this year.

This could describe my DC. Constant chest infections. Tons of antibiotics. Later turned into glue ear. Wish to god that I’d pushed harder for ENT. Was told that the NHS approach was ‘watchful waiting’. Eventually a hearing test confirmed she was missing certain lower timbre sounds impacting on phonics of course. There’s a body of research that indicates this is of more concern that is often acknowledged by GPs. Read the studies by Karen Bonuck.

pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21731137/

One cure would be living in the countryside and not seeing people and being outside a lot with lots of vit D in summer. Most of what you describe are things she catches from other people.

Washed down with lashings of ginger beer?

I lived in the countryside my whole childhood. Had tonsillitis twice a year, every year for about 5 years.

I'd test for allergies too. She could be a allergic to the animals that you work with

Push for her to be checked for immune system disorders.

You need to be specific with doctors. Don't just say "she's been I'll a lot lately", all kids get ill a lot. You need to say "she's had 10 lots of antibiotics in x months". "She's had x infection, then x then x then x". List them with months and dates if you can. Ideally provide the information in writing when you go in so it's clearly laid out. They get 10 mins so holding have time to read through everyone's notes. You need to clearly and concisely bring your concerns to their attention.

Ask for further tests and or a referral. If the first set of tests don't yield anything go back again and ask what else can he checked or for a referral. If you get fobbed off, see a different GP.

You need to keep badgering and advocating for adequate healthcare in this country.

Our neighbour's son had a very similar couple of years - he was basically on repeated courses of antibiotics that never solved the underlying issues. They eventually paid for a private paediatric consultation and got his tonsils out, which solved the problem.

Hope your DC feels better soon and you get to the bottom of it!

@AdultingInTheCountryside

I can’t believe you’ve given her antiobiitocs 10 times. You’ve killed here gut bacteria no wonder she has been sick. Every time you give her those you make her weaker because you’re killing her gut bacteria and breading harmful ones and making her immune system weaker.

antibiotics are prescription-only medication, so a doctor has prescribed them. i don't think OP should be criticised for following doctors' orders in caring for her child. there are concerns, which is why she is asking on here, and going to press the matter further with GP. you make it sound as if she has just grabbed some antbx from a store cupboard and been feeding them to her child gratuitously.

@Newyearnewme2022

No asthma in our family either, my daughter was diagnosed at around 3 and grew out of it, my son diagnosed at 5 and still suffers at 16. It would be good to rule it out so maybe ask to see your surgeries asthma nurse. My daughter was diagnosed from a constant dry nighttime cough, my son for coughing fits that caused him to vomit, neither had actual asthma attacks. If I were you I would be asking for a referral to ENT, in my experience GP’s will happily dole out antibiotics every 6 weeks and not refer without prompting.

Same here. No asthma in family yet my brother had childhood asthma (that seems to be making a come back post covid decades later) and I have asthma. Diagnosed at 9 after constant infections and antibiotics.

Once on inhalers I improved but I do have a tenancy to alway get a chest infection with a simple cold. So increasing high dose steroid+ laba inhalers, Salbutamol plus antibiotics and oral steroids.

DP and his brother both have asthma. Their parents do not either.

So don't rule it out

TooManyPJs Mon 04-Apr-22 01:40:23

OP, do this.

There was no asthma in my family either until my dc were diagnosed and then I realised what the endless coughs of my childhood and the one bout of wheezing aged 10 were. Even now I get a cough after a rare cold. Have still never been diagnosed though.

Thanks for all the advice. I’ll ask the doctor about celiacs when I ask for the referral and I’ll try and get some child friendly bacteria for her to eat

If it is reflux, what works to stop it? Thanks!

@AdultingInTheCountryside

I can’t believe you’ve given her antiobiitocs 10 times. You’ve killed here gut bacteria no wonder she has been sick. Every time you give her those you make her weaker because you’re killing her gut bacteria and breading harmful ones and making her immune system weaker.

Oh what nonsense.

So you'd leave the infections untreated to rampage through her body? THAT would make her weaker.