Prom dress shopping fiasco

[Cheshirecatwoman]

Yes IABU but want to vent after prom dress shopping nightmare with dd.

Yes I should have done research before booking and realised the (ridiculous) prices. They weren’t included on the website though.

Maybe we should have left when I realised that the price I had in mind was £115 pounds less than the cheapest dress.

Yes I should have stood firm instead of being cajoled and coerced by an overzealous saleswoman. (Even though I’d have looked like a horrible parent).

It’s not that we can’t afford it, more that it seems in particularly bad taste, especially in the current climate, to spend so much on one dress. Especially when it doesn’t tick all the boxes and needs altering. The whole thing feels a bit crude.

Dd is very easily led and loves being complimented. She is eager to please and not seem rude. She would look lovely in anything though. I feel that the sales pitch was directly at her, and my queries and misgivings were glossed over. An easy day for the sales assistant……

Basically I should have been an adult but I failed.

Oh dear. DD1 had a prom but she went for a midi length lace dress from Chi chi London. It was lovely, young and only £60!!!! DD2 had hers cancelled due to Covid. Some girls had fancy gowns but DD’s was fab and appropriate for a 16 year old.
You can always sell it next year and recoup some of the money.

www.chichiclothing.com/collections/prom-dresses

Proms are a ridiculous American import. YABU for propagating it.

I was stung for £520 for a dress that needed £80 of alterations. Hideous.

Oh @Lunalicious that’s unfair. It’s a school thing not a parent invention. Call it an end of term party if you like.

DD's is hanging in her wardrobe, since prom was cancelled 2 years ago. Thank goodness it was never altered, and was less than £100 in the sales.

Can you return/cancel it?

DD2 has hers in the wardrobe too and is trying to sell on Vinted.

@Lunalicious

Proms are a ridiculous American import. YABU for propagating it.

Yes definitely guilty.

Should have done more research beforehand.

Foolishly booked an appointment where some of her friends went to have a look at styles and colours.

Was swept up in a wave of overzealous selling and being told how lovely she looked. She did look lovely but would look lovely in one half the price too.

@FleeceNavidadfromtheSheep

DD's is hanging in her wardrobe, since prom was cancelled 2 years ago. Thank goodness it was never altered, and was less than £100 in the sales.

Can you return/cancel it?

Nope, as I handed over credit card , dying inside, they said it was non refundable or exchangeable…

She is eager to please and not seem rude.
I'm sorry but your reasoning for getting sucked in seem to be caused by the same thing.

@Malteser71

I was stung for £520 for a dress that needed £80 of alterations. Hideous.

Yes hideous is how I’d describe it too.

I like the dress but it would fit a 7ft person. There are nicer ones for half of the money.

They stood her on a 2 foot box so it was hard to visualise it properly.

Feeling slightly weak now every time I think about it.

Wish I’d insisted on being more involved and thinking about it/shopping around but was pressurised and fell for it.

So cross with myself

@Justmuddlingalong

She is eager to please and not seem rude. I'm sorry but your reasoning for getting sucked in seem to be caused by the same thing.

Yes I have realised that too, sadly too late.

We are obviously similar.

Should have taken dh

How much was it OP? DD had two prom dresses and I am now very glad that I bought them online for not much money. The 6th form one was from ASOS and looked lovely. Thing is tho, they get worn once and then never again IME. She even needed a different (non prom but still never worn again) dress for Leavers' Day. Oh for boys - DS2 wore his prom suit (which cost more than DD's dress tbf) to leavers' day, prom, and then sixth form for two years. He has since worn it a few times at uni as well. Bargain.

Anyway I guess it is about learning and not doing it next time. Can you post a pic so we can all gasp over how lovely it is?

Yet another US bloody import. I feel sorry for you being sucked into it all. Grateful I have boys who couldn't care less.

Cut your losses and tell her she'll not have a fake tan/manicure/hairdresser/make up artist.

And put the dress on eBay soon as she's worn it.

Coolest girl in my school turned up in jeans and a silk shirt she could wear forever. And arrived on foot.

Can you sell it on now before it's been altered and worn. Then get a much cheaper one.

Ah...that's prom dress shopping for you!

I had a maximum budget of £150 in mind.

Dd fell in love with onto hire at our local shop but they'd mistakenly let her try it on as it turned out to already be booked.

So off we went to a huge Prom dress place and hour or so away where she tried on about a dozen dresses and fell in love with one for £355!

Tbf she's a tricky shape and she had two part time jobs at the time so we went halves on it.

It is bonkers but if you can afford it and she's happy, just let it go.

@Lunalicious and @Mojoj - you two sound fun! The word "prom" might be American, the rest of it hardly is. Even when I was young we had socials, and now they are called balls - it's all the same thing.

OP - you really don't need to spend a fortune on a dress, don't be sucked in by it all.

“How much was it OP? “

Around £400

Horrific.

I have the money. I love my dd and want her to feel fantastic.

I just have a nagging feeling it’s the wrong way to make someone feel fantastic. And I feel more aligned to people who spend less or use secondhand to make their own statement.

Had you not discussed budget with your DD? Or was it an open ended present?

Maybe suggest she starts earning a bit of money herself to pay for the inevitable accessories, beauty treatments and transport etc.

“ OP - you really don't need to spend a fortune on a dress, don't be sucked in by it all.”

Wish I’d read this last night 😩

No way.
Wouldn't she consider a second hand dress?

@Lunalicious

Proms are a ridiculous American import. YABU for propagating it.

We had a school formal with fancy dresses and boys in tux in 1985

It’s been part of my school from it was founded in the 1800s.

🤷🏼‍♀️

The dress is not the problem - your parenting and DD's expectations are ...

So how you going to fix that?