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Original poster

how to respond to a rude email?

99 replies

JenniferAlisonPhilipaSue · 24/03/2022 20:58

How would you respond to a rude email from a colleague?

Said colleague has basically implied I'm thick, and haven't tried everything I actually have tried to solve the problem arising.

It just got my back up. There was no need for his tone.

I thought about replying "Thank you for your input" but not sure if that adequately conveys I think he's a cunt. I could ignore his email but that also lets him know that he can speak to me like that.

I'm just pissed off. What can I say or do?

OP posts:
MayMorris · 24/03/2022 21:52

@stonebrambleboy

I wouldn't email him. I'd go round to his office and speak to him.
This. Set up a meeting with him in a private room. Then tell him how his email made you feel. State in terms of “I” not “you”. Tell your story, then ask him how you can improve the communication between you so that it doesn’t happen again. Confront him, basically, with his behaviour and how it makes people feel
Nextlevelnonsense · 24/03/2022 21:55

I actually blasted someone via email for a pretty incompetent situation.
I wasn't rude, but had to be rather direct.
The response was:
'You're Welcome!'

Didn't resolve a thing, but made me laugh for a long time.

TheRealistBub · 24/03/2022 21:56

[ delete button ]

gamerchick · 24/03/2022 21:57

@JenniferAlisonPhilipaSue

snippet of his email:

"if you had asked your manager [name], he would have told you....'

Said manager, and numerous other people said to ask rude guy.

Manager now on leave though.

Fwd it to your manager and those other people, copy him in to your fwd message to those people?
wildseas · 24/03/2022 21:59

Dear shittycollegue,

Thank you for your reply.

I should have mentioned in my previous email that I had already asked boss and he suggested contacting you as it came within your remit.

Please can you (copy and paste of original email using exact same words)

Tone is so difficult to read in emails isn't it.

Best wishes,
...

AlisonDonut · 24/03/2022 22:01

Aah so you reply 'manager thought you would be able to help so pointed me in your direction. Thanks for the info, I'll let manager know. Cheers.'

FlamingoDust · 24/03/2022 22:02

Noted

Natty13 · 24/03/2022 22:02

"Dear Dick,

I find the tone of your unnecessarily rude. Please have a little more professional courtesy in your future communications to me.

Per my previous emails I have asked (manager) and they told me to ask you. If you are not willing or not able to advise me then I will wait until (manager) is back from leave and seek an alternative.

Thank you

OP"

Tbh, people don't do this shit to me because i absolutely do not take it. Don't apologise, don't pretend to be confused, or pretend you think he is confused. When peolle do that in my work they lose all respect even when they were the victims in the first place.

wildseas · 24/03/2022 22:02

Or, forward his email to his boss, with him cc'd in, with a covering note that says something along the lines of

"Dear shittycolleguemanager

Neither shittycollegue nor I are sure how to fix x,y,z. Please would you be able to give us some support?

Please see email trail below for what we have tried.

Best wishes
..."

Boxowine · 24/03/2022 22:05

Don’t put anything in an email. I would and have run around the office and told my co-workers how much of an a hole so and so is but never in writing.

WhenDovesFly · 24/03/2022 22:06

Colleague
To clarify, I've tried all of those actions already but they haven't stopped the problem arising. [Manager] suggested contacting you as you may have some fresh ideas, but that does not seem to be the case. Thank you anyway.

Mitsouko67 · 24/03/2022 22:06

I would employ the response of no response.

I always ignore rude emails.

Thumpkin · 24/03/2022 22:08

‘In fact, I was directed by the manager to raise this with you. X and Y also advised the same, so I’m a rather surprised by your response. Perhaps you could speak to me on the phone if you have concerns?
Regards.’

NameChChChChanges1 · 24/03/2022 22:11

My favourite is "I'll take that under advisement"

Duchess379 · 24/03/2022 22:17

"Thank you, Captain Obvious, for your condescending email implying I don't know how to do my job. I have, in fact, tried XY& Z & the problem still isn't resolved"

Your welcome 😃😉

London2Lisbon · 24/03/2022 22:17

www.tiktok.com/@tegaalexander/video/6919211725417942274?lang=en

I’ll just leave this here!

Cocomarine · 24/03/2022 22:20

@JenniferAlisonPhilipaSue

snippet of his email:

"if you had asked your manager [name], he would have told you....'

Said manager, and numerous other people said to ask rude guy.

Manager now on leave though.

So just be factual. “Actually John, it was Manager who suggested I speak to you. Can let me know if you’re able to do ”
SwelegantParty · 24/03/2022 22:24

Tell him that your manager suggested contacting him, but since he's obviously unable to assist, you'll let your manager know....

ChiefWiggumsBoy · 24/03/2022 22:31

I once got an absolutely blistering email from someone who had completely misinterpreted what I had said and come back, copying in my manager and his manager.

I wrote a blistering email back, deleted it, and then sent back something short and sweet, something like "I agree it would probably be best if we got on a call to discuss this". I had invited him to about 8 meetings, had repeatedly asked for sign off on a number of issues and had already raised this as an issue that I was getting no response. I am still proud I emailed back so calmly!

I like @WhenDovesFly response:

Colleague
To clarify, I've tried all of those actions already but they haven't stopped the problem arising. [Manager] suggested contacting you as you may have some fresh ideas, but that does not seem to be the case. Thank you anyway.

Aaaabbbcccc · 24/03/2022 22:31

Haha MN gives the worst advice on work place politics. Do not respond to him under any circumstances. If you do, you engage, and even if you correct him, at least to some degree you accept the premise of what he says. If you don’t, it is just his opinion.

Ignore.

viques · 24/03/2022 22:32

@JenniferAlisonPhilipaSue

snippet of his email:

"if you had asked your manager [name], he would have told you....'

Said manager, and numerous other people said to ask rude guy.

Manager now on leave though.

Kill with kindness and a knife in the gut.

Many apologies! I had already spoken to XXX who assured me that you would be the best person to ask. Sorry this wasn’t the case, I will advise XXX that zzzz is not your forte after all.

Regards..

Aaaabbbcccc · 24/03/2022 22:32

Haha lots of these suggested emails will actually make you look dim. Don’t do it!

Aaaabbbcccc · 24/03/2022 22:33

If you absolutely have to say ‘dear X, I was told to ask you. Thanks’

Phlewf · 24/03/2022 22:36

I like “there seems to be some confusion … I have done XYZ/am working on instructions from Joe Bloggs/I am full control of the situation”
Main thing is to avoid a line about if they have any further questions. I sometimes even write it and delete it. So you’ve stated your case, and ended the conversation.

LemonTT · 24/03/2022 22:36

@Aaaabbbcccc

Haha MN gives the worst advice on work place politics. Do not respond to him under any circumstances. If you do, you engage, and even if you correct him, at least to some degree you accept the premise of what he says. If you don’t, it is just his opinion. Ignore.
This.