Being called "Debs"

[ValerieCupcake]

We have had a new director appointed. She is I assume named Deborah, but calls herself Debs.

AIBU to feel I would be taken less seriously by using this as my name in a high level professional role? I think it is too "Twee And Cutesy"!

@SimpleShootingWeekend

I have a Debs at work! She’s ace and quite high up but our actual boss is Babs, occasionally known as Bee. We also have a Lizzy, Abbie/Abs, Katie, Tommy (male) and a Jilly whose real name is not Jilly but that’s what she is called. I have a friend called Mags who is one of those shit hot head teachers they make documentaries about.

@SimpleShootingWeekend I have a friend called Mags who is one of those shit hot head teachers they make documentaries about.

But does she address herself as 'Mags' in the school prospectus or in the newsletters?

I should imagine most people use the shortened version of their name OP, no matter who they are or what job they do.

I think if she changed her name to Poppet or Bunny that might be twee or cutesy. But if she was professional and good at her job, people would soon change their mind.

That's interesting Poxy, I have always been taught envious is wanting what someone else has, being resentful of that. Jealous being jealously guarding what you have so nobody takes it away.

Who are these people that have always been teaching you the incorrect meaning of jealousy?

I bet Debs knows what jealousy means.

@ValerieCupcake

I was christened Deborah. My name has always been pronounced the way Jarvis sings it - but it never suited me!!

Known as Debs since the 1980’s and I can promise you it hasn’t affected my career etc. I’m pretty sure you’d agree I’m neither twee nor cutesy if you met me. However, like most here, I absolutely do not judge by name.

Good luck with your new director - I suspect she won’t suffer fools gladly.

But does she address herself as 'Mags' in the school prospectus or in the newsletters?

I would imagine Dr LastName because teachers tend not to use their first name at work, at least not at my kids school, but her colleagues call her Mags, she calls herself Mags (like the OPs boss “calls herself Debs”) and her email address is MagsLastname@terribleaccadamytrust or similar.

There's a bloke I know called Alexander. He has an important job but prefers to be known as Boris cos its cuter and makes him sound jovial and approachable and funny.

@sherbertdib

There's a bloke I know called Alexander. He has an important job but prefers to be known as Boris cos its cuter and makes him sound jovial and approachable and funny.

I am willing to bet Debs in the OP would do a better job than him!

I know a Debs who is absolutely terrifying. I never considered it a cutesy name before I met her either.

sherbertdib

Maggie only to close friends and elements wanting to put down a woman.

I thought I'd heard that Margaret Thatcher was not called Maggie by her friends and family, only by journalists (because it's shorter and fits better in headlines) and later by people who didn't like her. I certainly find it very hard to imagine her inviting short forms of her name, she seemed a bit too imperious for that. I always found it a bit surprising that journalists didn't really hit on a consistent short form for Theresa May, but it could have been because May itself was very short and worked even better in headlines. I think Boris Johnson is the only male PM I can remember who is usually referred to by his first (well, second in this case) name in headlines. Maybe Tony Blair to some extent but not as much.

Debs can call herself whatever she likes as far as I'm concerned, and people should respect that.

As for the pronunciation of Deborah, I've known Deborahs who liked it both ways. I have another one of those names where some people give it an extra syllable in the middle and some don't. My parents were keen on the full 3 syllables so I always introduced myself that way when I was younger, but I think that pronunciation is getting less and less common, and I usually use a short form now, partly because I'm convinced the 3-syllable version of the longer name makes me sound fussy and stand-offish, but I can't quite bring myself to use the 2-syllable version because the parents in my head would tell me off.

Other people can call themselves what they like.

What I am firm about is that you only ever call someone what they introduce themselves as. So if someone tells you their name is Nicola you call her Nicola. If she prefers Nick, Nic or Nicky that's fine too and you should go with that, but don't take it on yourself to decide what she should be called especially if it's knickers