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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be disappointed with the school re trip

311 replies

pisspants · 17/03/2022 08:14

I understand schools and teachers are busy and that it is great they have tried to organise a trip. I am upset on behalf of my dc though. There's an upcoming trip, details of which went out in one email over a month ago, with no further mentions or reminders about it. This week a follow up email went out regarding more details about what to wear for the trip etc which was the first I knew of the trip. I checked the online payment system and was no sign of it on there so called the school and they say the deadline has passed as the bus needed to know numbers etc a while back so my dc will have to miss the trip. I appreciate I missed one email which was sent in the middle of the day whilst I was working so didnt see it. It then got buried amongst all the crappy emails I get every day from everywhere I've ever bought anything from. Because of that my DC now misses the educational trip that almost the whole year is going on? I know I dropped a ball by not seeing the email but I would have expected a follow up email as a reminder of a payment deadline or something at the least?

OP posts:
implantreplace · 18/03/2022 10:44

Everyone going on about reminders

They didn’t need to send a reminder

They filled ALL the places

Hence…. The waiting list

Whoopsies · 18/03/2022 10:47

I know lots of people hate class WhatsApp groups, but this is what mine is great for. If there is a payment deadline/own clothes day/form that needs sending back etc then someone always reminds the group!

Belladonna12 · 18/03/2022 10:56

@implantreplace

Everyone going on about reminders

They didn’t need to send a reminder

They filled ALL the places

Hence…. The waiting list

OP said that it was an educational trip for the whole year so they would originally have had enough spaces for the whole year or they should have done.
HSHorror · 18/03/2022 11:15

Yabu

But yes our school do only tell you once about paying for trips.

Bear in mind too there have been a lot less trips last 2yrs. My y1 kid has only been to somewhere very local in all 18m.

CMZ2018 · 18/03/2022 11:58

Unfortunately in this situation the child misses out due to parent incompetence

HSHorror · 18/03/2022 12:16

Our school payment system can send an alert t if there is something added parentpay

implantreplace · 18/03/2022 12:31

@Belladonna12

No necessarily
Our school had an “educational trip” as all trip during school hours are deemed to be.
However only 70% availability so first come first served
And 30% remaining continued with the school timetable on the day other on their trip.

implantreplace · 18/03/2022 12:32

@CMZ2018

Unfortunately in this situation the child misses out due to parent incompetence
That’s the truth of it

We’ve all done it. It’s frustrating. But I’ve been frustrated with MYSELF and no one else

Sherrystrull · 18/03/2022 13:02

@TheYearOfSmallThings

What jobs other people do are largely irrelevant.

No, I don't think it is irrelevant. The post I was responding to gave a long list of things that teachers do (as part of their job) and then said "all" parents have to do is keep track of a few emails. Which is an invalid comparison, because it ignores the fact that the parents have an equally long list of things to do each day in their job.

That's not what they meant. Of course that's not all parents have to think about.

Jobs are irrelevant. As a parent you need to keep track of correspondence from school whether you work full time, part time, don't work etc. I remember talking to my mum on the phone about a dress up day for my older child when I was in hospital having a baby. That's life.

cherryonthecakes · 18/03/2022 13:13

Everyone has had a fuck up or two. I've not missed a trip but once I thought it was an INSET day when it wasn't and I didn't take my kids to school 🤦🏻‍♀️

Maybe you should get an email address solely for school stuff so it's not lost in your mailbox? I have an iPhone and I can see mail in multiple accounts.

budgiegirl · 18/03/2022 13:14

I think it's quite mean everybody sticking the boot in. It sounds like OP is usually quite organised and just missed this one email. Easy to do

I don't think it's really a case of sticking the boot in. Just pointing out that if a parent misses an email, it's not the school's fault. We've all been there, I'm sure. I know I have. But I didn't blame the school, I was annoyed with myself.

TheYearOfSmallThings · 18/03/2022 13:23

That's not what they meant.

Neither of us know what they meant, but I know what they said, and I think it stands correcting.

budgiegirl · 18/03/2022 13:31

Jobs are irrelevant. As a parent you need to keep track of correspondence from school whether you work full time, part time, don't work etc. I remember talking to my mum on the phone about a dress up day for my older child when I was in hospital having a baby. That's life

I agree. It is difficult sometimes juggling work and children, but that's just how it is if you're a working parent. Don't forget, many teachers will also be juggling work and parenthood, so why should they have to do extra work because a parent doesn't respond to an email? Yes, it would be nice to get a reminder, but if you don't, it doesn't mean that it's the schools fault that you forgot.

Brainfogmcfogface · 18/03/2022 14:15

I’ve set my school up as a VIP on my iPhone so any emails come through like a text on my screen.
Not much use now I know, but for future reference may be useful.

Sherrystrull · 18/03/2022 15:02

@TheYearOfSmallThings

That's not what they meant.

Neither of us know what they meant, but I know what they said, and I think it stands correcting.

If you honestly think they meant dealing with school emails is the only thing parents have to do then clearly we will have to agree with disagree.
NinaDefoe · 18/03/2022 16:05

I think it's quite mean everybody sticking the boot in. It sounds like OP is usually quite organised and just missed this one email. Easy to do

If the OP had said ‘I’m kicking myself because I didn’t chase this up/ read my emails properly/ notice that payment was due’ then she would have had loads if sympathy. Instead, she tried to blame the school.

TheYearOfSmallThings · 18/03/2022 16:08

we will have to agree with disagree.

Agreed, although you have chosen to misunderstand my point.

3totheright4totheleft · 18/03/2022 16:14

And this is the reason I use my work email address for school related stuff. No chance of missing it.

Sherrystrull · 18/03/2022 16:44

@TheYearOfSmallThings

we will have to agree with disagree.

Agreed, although you have chosen to misunderstand my point.

I really haven't.
TheYearOfSmallThings · 18/03/2022 16:49

I really haven't

Yes, in fairness I can't be certain it was by choice.

Tinkerbell1980 · 18/03/2022 17:43

No dice. School can't continually chase parents nor spoon feed them! They have enough to do. You're the adult. Apologise to your child and move on.

Tigerlilly78 · 18/03/2022 17:53

YANBU but unfortunately you've missed out. It's not their fault but you're probably more pissed at yourself than them. Not the end of the world tho.

Mrsbunton · 18/03/2022 17:53

It’s not up to the school to ensure that everyone pays attention to their emails.

ILoveAllRainbowsx · 18/03/2022 17:57

@MintJulia

Time to unsubscribe from all the rubbish so you can see the important stuff.

Suppose you had missed an email about a vaccination or exam choices.

This. Or have 2 email addresses - one for important things and one for shopping etc.
lauramaisyday · 18/03/2022 18:00

Thus is my pet hate about schools now. They expect you to be online 24/7 what ever happened to popping a letter out with the kids to. It's just laziness by the school and technically if it's an educational trip you are under no obligation to pay anyway if you look it up.