Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think DP should not be going out after testing positive?

104 replies

Imaysnapandfart · 15/03/2022 20:25

DP tested positive yesterday and today went out to the shops - several, non-urgent - without a mask and we just had a huge argument about it. AIBU to think I’m in the right here? He maintains that because it’s not a LEGAL requirement (although government guidelines are to self isolate) that he did nothing wrong.

OP posts:
EventuallyDelighted · 15/03/2022 20:48

There's a difference between going to work and popping out to the shops for bits and bobs you don't really need. However at this point I really can't get worked up about this, just going to work on the basis its out there everywhere now.

BrutusMcDogface · 15/03/2022 20:48

@Changemaname1

I mean legally no , and yes we are meant to be living with it now but to knowingly have it and not even bother with a mask is selfish IMO
This. You wouldn’t (I hope) go out with noro or chicken pox.

I’m a healthy 40 year old and this virus is currently knocking me for six. Would never willingly inflict it on anyone.

A580Hojas · 15/03/2022 20:48

Yes. There are still many CEV people for whom a dose of covid will kill them. I simply do not understand why people don't get this.

Alfredsothermistress · 15/03/2022 20:50

@BitterTits

Does it sound like the OP’s husband had much of a choice to do a non-urgent shop, without a mask?

Which is of course exactly the same as someone expecting to go into work despite being positive…

QuebecBagnet · 15/03/2022 20:52

Expected to come into if they test positive

Yes, Dd has been moaning because she’s worked all weekend behind the bar with a colleague who is positive and the managers all know she’s positive but told her to come into work. Other people there also positive. An exclusive, private health club that members pay a lot of money for and they don’t pay sick pay.

bellac11 · 15/03/2022 20:54

@A580Hojas

Yes. There are still many CEV people for whom a dose of covid will kill them. I simply do not understand why people don't get this.
This is completely irresponsible language. Its not correct to say that if you're CEV it 'will kill you'. That is not correct

The people most at risk are those on whom the vaccines had low or no effect. But CEV and CV (including me and my partner) who have vaccines, who have responded well to them are not a high risk of serious illness or death.

randomuser2019 · 15/03/2022 20:54

This reply has been withdrawn

This post has been withdrawn at the poster's request due to privacy concerns.

OrlandointheWilderness · 15/03/2022 20:55

It's completely irresponsible. I'm healthy, mid thirties and triple vaccinated. This virus has had me unable to get out of bed for any length of time for 3 days so far, I've never felt this ill.

Alfredsothermistress · 15/03/2022 20:55

@QuebecBagnet

Expected to come into if they test positive

Yes, Dd has been moaning because she’s worked all weekend behind the bar with a colleague who is positive and the managers all know she’s positive but told her to come into work. Other people there also positive. An exclusive, private health club that members pay a lot of money for and they don’t pay sick pay.

Oh well, tell your DD to stop moaning then.
Original poster
Imaysnapandfart · 15/03/2022 20:57

@bellac11 they may be so for you and your partner. My DM has basically no immune system and has end stage kidney failure. If she were the catch Covid it would be a game changer for sure.

OP posts:
bellac11 · 15/03/2022 20:59

[quote Imaysnapandfart]@bellac11 they may be so for you and your partner. My DM has basically no immune system and has end stage kidney failure. If she were the catch Covid it would be a game changer for sure.[/quote]
And that was covered in my post in terms of people who dont respond to the vaccines. Dont misrepresent what I said.

SquirrelFan · 15/03/2022 21:02

Pretty selfish. Work if you have no choice, understandable. But not the shops, unmasked. That's inconsiderate, bordering on dishonourable.

slimshady18 · 15/03/2022 21:04

@A580Hojas

Yes. There are still many CEV people for whom a dose of covid will kill them. I simply do not understand why people don't get this.
yes but you cant not go out just to cater to other people's needs. CEV people have to make their own judgement, you have to make ur own decisions and if u choose to go out then thats ok too
Hoolahoophop · 15/03/2022 21:04

Yep, selfish, at the very least he should wear a mask knowing his positive. I know we need to live with it and flu is also a risk to the CEV but we don't isolate for that, but we also cant test for that easily at home and there are not rules all over the place about flu. My DC caught COVID recently, it was no worse than a cold, but it also meant cancelling a long awaited hospital appointment at short notice, now waiting again for a problem far more serious for DC than COVID will ever be. Also will have cost the NHS (quoted £160) because they will not have been able to fill the appointment short notice. He may not kill anyone with his actions, but he could seriously inconvenience them and wearing a mask would make that a lot less likely.

AngelicInnocent · 15/03/2022 21:09

Legally I'm sure it's fine but morally, it's a bit off.

Raindancer411 · 15/03/2022 21:09

He is being an idiot... my son has just had his first negative test today and whilst he has been ill, I have been either staying out of shops or if I have had to go in, wore a mask. I even cancelled taking my toddler to a group as I didn't want to risk it with the parents with young babies there...

Boood · 15/03/2022 21:09

To me, “living with covid” means we don’t all have to act as if every other person is a deadly threat to be avoided at all costs. It doesn’t mean if you KNOW you’ve got it you should carry on without a care in the world. You have a moral responsibility not to go round spreading it, so that everyone else can carry on.

StupidUsernameUnavailable · 15/03/2022 21:10

@Imaysnapandfart

I lost my Nan and Uncle to Covid. I am of the opinion we do need to get on with it.

Then again I'm not testing everyday so if I was asymptomatic I wouldn't know anyways 🤷‍♀️

MoMuntervary · 15/03/2022 21:14

It's definitely selfish. Obviously some people have to work. But he didn't.

We may well be living with it but it's still being massively disruptive. DS's school has closed two year groups this week because they haven't got enough staff. And before people say they should just make the positive staff come in, they're not even offering full home learning as too many staff are too ill to teach.

Beeinmybonnets · 15/03/2022 21:15

yanbu. He is very, very selfish

Wordlewobble · 15/03/2022 21:19

Your DH is a complete selfish morally bankrupt knob head just because it isn’t a legal requirement anymore doesn’t mean going out whilst being positive with a strong chance of passing on the virus is the right thing to do.

What about any people who are CEV he may encounter or if anyone he meets has family members who are CEV at home even if they are vaccinated who could unknowingly come into contact with your DH not wearing a mask and knowing full well he is positive.

A stupid selfish kid in lower 6th and his sibling at my daughters school came into school knowing he had covid last week. He has now managed to infect quite a few teachers and pupils (some of whom are in the sixth form and are having to miss out on Uni offer visits this week and part time work at the weekend and worrying they may have inadvertently passed covid onto vulnerable family members.

OneGoodTurn · 15/03/2022 21:22

I’m curious as to why he bothered to test himself in the first place! If you’re asymptomatic, don’t know you have it and go
out and about then that’s one thing, but to go the trouble of sticking a swab up your nose but choosing to do nothing with the info seems like a total exercise in pointlessness.

Baaaa · 15/03/2022 21:23

Legally fine. Morally I couldn't if I'd had a positive test. I unknowingly passed it to my parents and I'd do anything to have known so I didn't.

Why did he bother testing if he was just going to carry on whatever?

londonrach · 15/03/2022 21:25

Neighbour in professional job been ordered to go into work day 1 of being positive. His wife stood a distance from me with mask on saying why ...he can work from home. Don't understand the rules

Imanidiotiknow · 15/03/2022 21:29

You're correct, he's a dick.

Swipe left for the next trending thread