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AIBU?

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Original poster

Should I be upset

69 replies

TwoBranch · 13/03/2022 20:01

So my boyfriend and I met through a video game. We decided to get a new game for just us to play together. He started to play it without me and I got a little upset about it and told him that. During some arguments he decided to join and speak to other girls on the game which upset me even more. He even added them as friends. We worked it out and he agreed to delete the women but then readded them again during another argument. After that I explained to him that I am now extremely hurt whenever he plays it without me, and asked if he could simply wait to play it until I get home. It has become his new favourite game now and he continues to play it all day every day despite how much it hurts and upsets me. Am I unreasonable to be upset about him playing without me, or for asking him to wait til I can join too?

OP posts:
ladydimitrescu · 13/03/2022 20:12

Yeah I don't think you can dictate to him that he can't play a game without you.
You met via a game, it sounds like you're now paranoid he will meet someone else via the game and that's why you want to be present everytime he plays.
Online gaming entails playing with other players of both sexes, you're being quite controlling tbh.

ladydimitrescu · 13/03/2022 20:13

In summary - it's not about the game, it's about your paranoia around him possibly meeting someone the way you met.

HeddaGarbled · 13/03/2022 20:15

Does he not have a job?

Original poster
TwoBranch · 13/03/2022 20:16

He plays many other games too, with and without other players, which I have no issue with at all.

OP posts:
LIZS · 13/03/2022 20:17

Are you both young? Been together for how long? Why are you so insecure online, he could just as easily meet someone else in the street?

Veryverycalmnow · 13/03/2022 20:18

I'd be concerned that he's playing it all day every day. That doesn't sound particularly healthy. Have you tried getting him outdoors?

Original poster
TwoBranch · 13/03/2022 20:19

He occasionally works on small projects from home as a freelance programmer

OP posts:
Aprilx · 13/03/2022 20:20

I can’t decide whether you are being very childish or very controlling. My husband bought us a scrabble set, we are both free to play it with other people.

Original poster
TwoBranch · 13/03/2022 20:21

I'm 30. He is 41. It's a long distance relationship. Only been 6 months.

OP posts:
ImBurtMacklin · 13/03/2022 20:26

6 months and you’ve already had arguments where he is escalating things just to piss you off?

Take a look at yourself; you deserve better.

HeddaGarbled · 13/03/2022 20:26

Have you ever met in real life?

britneyisfree · 13/03/2022 20:27

Grow up.

Toottooot · 13/03/2022 20:28

Poor guy.

Ohsugarhoneyicetea · 13/03/2022 20:28

A 41 year old behaving like that has some kind of developmental problems. Sounds like he is mentally the age of a 17 year old.

TheNewSchmoo · 13/03/2022 20:28

My gosh, I thought you were teenagers.

CristinaYangismySpiritAnimal · 13/03/2022 20:29

You don’t trust him. You will never trust him. This will not get better.

DartmoorChef · 13/03/2022 20:29

Dear God I thought you'd both be teenagers.

WhatTheWhoTheWhatThe · 13/03/2022 20:29

Well it all sounds ridiculously immature.

Unanananana · 13/03/2022 20:30

I thought you were both about 15!

Time to grow up.

MichelleScarn · 13/03/2022 20:30

@TwoBranch

I'm 30. He is 41. It's a long distance relationship. Only been 6 months.
Are you in the same time zone?
Notimeforaname · 13/03/2022 20:31

This has to be a joke. If not, you've got bigger problems than a game.

You're verging on controlling and you both sound about 13..

Kite22 · 13/03/2022 20:32

Reading the OP, I assumed you were about 13.

What an odd relationship.

Kite22 · 13/03/2022 20:33

Oh, x-posted

QWE96 · 13/03/2022 20:35

@TheNewSchmoo

My gosh, I thought you were teenagers.
My thoughts also.

To be brutally honest, you both need to grow up. You're both as bad as each other - you can't dictate when he plays this and his behaviour is immature. I'd be taking a look at this relationship and wondering if it's really worth the teenage-like drama.

Lalliella · 13/03/2022 20:36

He’s adding women to deliberately piss you off when you’ve had an argument? He plays video games all day long? Raise your standards OP and ditch this teenager.