To think a holiday with a toddler could actually be fun?

[SleeplessInSouthEast]

Yes, appreciate there are bigger things going on in the world but holiday was booked way back for us to go to Portugal so my extended family can meet my little one for the first time since she was born and it's non-refundable. She's almost 2.

The thing is, all I hear and read is how stressful going away with little ones is, from packing, to the flight, to entertaining them whilst away etc, how it's never really a holiday for mums as we have to spend our entire time planning/sorting/switched on, etc etc.

Frankly, I'm starting to dread it now! We haven't been away anywhere, not even a domestic short break for over 3 years and pre-kiddo. I just want us all to have a fun time and not come back feeling it was a waste and we should've stayed home!

AIBU to think it's actually possible to truly enjoy a holiday abroad with a young toddler?

Would welcome any tips and wisdom from MNs with positive experiences!

(One idea was to do an online click and collect shop before we set off to the supermarket near the hotel for nappies, milk, yoghurts etc)

Thank you!

Oh and by 3 it’s way more fun as they notice they are on holiday! Young babies just resent the disruption to their routine and often aren’t their sunny ‘best’. Your 3 yr old will be excited and there is really nothing quite so cute as an excited 3 year old.

Tip- buy a cheap small paddling pool from a touristy shop, and a watering can, fill it with water, add a few plastic cups and your toddler will play with that next to your lounger for 15 mins or so

@MontgomeryHawka

Personally, I can’t think of anything more boring than lying on a sun lounger by a pool or sunbathing on a beach. If I go to the beach I want to be making sandcastles or rock pooling - very fun with a toddler.

I also love to visit art galleries and museums. My children have been visiting art galleries with me since they were born. I found you can keep toddlers engaged by asking them lots of questions about what they can see or which painting is their favourite. Also give them little tasks, like can you spot a painting with a sunflower? Toddlers love museums too.

I love and really miss galleries and museums. Such a great shout! Honestly I thought DD would be too little for the experience but reading your post I think it might be time to venture out. (I've been secretly wishing it would be something DD might enjoy doing with me and London has so many great and free ones to go to as well. Something to do even when we're not on holiday!)

YANBU. We had a lovely holiday last year with DS who was 18 months, me and DH. We stayed in a self catering cottage in Devon. We went on little outings every day to the beach, farm parks etc. Ate fish and chips and crab sandwiches. DS saw the sea for the first time, rode on a tractor and didn't shut up about it for days etc etc.

Yes I was still cooking and cleaning but I had DH's help and neither of us was working, which we normally both are. And I got to kick back with a book while DS napped, and drink wine in the evenings after he was asleep. I had a really lovely time and planning to do similar this year, now with a 6 month old baby in tow as well.

If you have family nearby who will be happy to watch your toddler, even at the same time as you that will help a lot, too.

@zippygeorgebungle

Some of my favourite hols ever have had toddlers with me. I have loved showing them the pool and swimming with them on my back waterbabies style, seeing their delight at going on a little land train, paddling in the sea. Their delight at tiny things like ice cream, living statues, carousels, the plane. Of course it is hard work but like the rest of it it somehow makes every aspect, even the mundane parts like the airport, special and fun. Twice pre covid I have booked a day or two before and had a sunny weekend away on a whim with a little one. Have fun!

What wonderful images this brings up!

@89redballoons

YANBU. We had a lovely holiday last year with DS who was 18 months, me and DH. We stayed in a self catering cottage in Devon. We went on little outings every day to the beach, farm parks etc. Ate fish and chips and crab sandwiches. DS saw the sea for the first time, rode on a tractor and didn't shut up about it for days etc etc.

Yes I was still cooking and cleaning but I had DH's help and neither of us was working, which we normally both are. And I got to kick back with a book while DS napped, and drink wine in the evenings after he was asleep. I had a really lovely time and planning to do similar this year, now with a 6 month old baby in tow as well.

If you have family nearby who will be happy to watch your toddler, even at the same time as you that will help a lot, too.

Oooh that nice glass of wine after bed time sounds amazing 😌

Take some cheap blow up toys and some books. Maybe leave them there?

It will be fun.

Have no expectations of actually relaxing, plan everything around your toddler and enjoy toddler cuddles in a lovely place. This too shall pass!

We stayed at villas in Portugal each year when the children were babies, then toddlers. We stopped when they were around 6-7 years.

If you can get a second home that's set up for little ones it's so easy. In the modern day of airBB you can message the host and ask.

We only chose properties with gates and gates pools and travel cot and high chairs etc. we also always had good laundry facilities with a dryer. And we had a daily maid service to make beds and clean the kitchen.

I would say it was as easy as home as being in a different house never is. But it was close, and relaxing.

The only time it failed was when I became quite ill on one holiday and couldn't care for my toddler easily. He got up to a lot of mischief having discovered he could fling fruit over the gate into the pool with lots of splashing noises.

Generally excellent holidays. The paediatric Heath care is also excellent (better than our system) as we discovered on one trip.

We did about 7 holidays to good villas. I organised car hire, villa rental and local direct flights. It was originally the very local flights and ease of getting to Portugal that I liked.

I loved holidays when mine were small! They were wide-eyed at everything and they made us enjoy it more as the littlest thing was exciting to them. Even the boring bit at the airport was fun as they loved seeing the planes. Take books, colouring pencils, toys and snacks for the plane. You can buy nappies and anything you might need there, do there is no need to panic if you forget anything. Your dc will love the pool and sand so much. Lots of little strolls also. One of my favourite memories is pushing ds up and down trying to get him to nap and him sitting himself up and pointing out palm trees and boats etc!

Also, people love kids in Portugal, I remember waitresses taking ds and dd off to show them the lobster tank or choose their ice-cream. You will honestly all have a great time, just remember to make the most of it as these days fly by.

I took crayola magic pens and pads so no mess, also water colouring pads and pens. Lots of snacks, calpol just in case, a tablet with cartoons, even if they watch with no sound it can help though i got my daughter headphones headband like these: CozyPhones Kids Headphones for Girls Volume Limited with Thin Speakers & Super Soft Stretchy Headband

Was mine one of those kids which screamed for the whole plane ride? Yes. Did we enjoy it when we was there? Absolutely! We took along some toys but in the end she sat and played with two plastic cups, tipping water from one to another, for the entire holiday, finding it hilarious if one started to float away so I had to go get it. Only points I'd pick up on is luggage. My toddler went through soooo many t-shirts/shorts due to the amount of ice creams/yogurts/lollies being spilt. Also bare in mind Covid. When away late last year we were not allowed to mix with the other hotels at all, they were asked to show their key card on entry. So the only place we could mix kids was on the beach.

Could you use one of those ride on kids cases as your hand luggage so she can be pulled round the airport on it?

The good thing about toddlers and young children is that they just love hanging out with their parents. I took mine to galleries and museums from a young age mainly because I wanted to go. I just made sure I threw in a playground, beach and ice cream every now and then.
Every holiday I’ve taken dc to is a place I’ve wanted to go to and they’ve always enjoyed it.

Go for it. Great memories of trips with our Dds st this age. All through Italy, North Carolina to visit friends, Paris, Wales London. The trick is to slow down, find the parks, the galleries, the markets where the locals go. Take a sarong for a picnic cloth/sunshade, bring crayons for the restaurants. You will appreciate the places you visit on a different level altogether.

Absolute doable and enjoyable.

We flew with DD from early on, we are Germans and driving is a nightmare if you only go for a short visit. So plane it was.

We also went to Spain when she was just under 2.

We had books with us, DVDs (now I would download stuff on the tablet), her blanket and some cuddly toys so she felt ok sleeping in an unfamiliar bed/cot. I think for the flight she was the best informed person as the emergeny card was studied for a very long time. Otherwise sticker books, paper and crayons and a new magazine from the airport shop did the trick. We had a second set in the luggage for the flight back.

We had small toys, like Happyland figures with us and bought a cheap bucket and spade we left at the holiday villa.

Could your family borrow some toys or get some cheap?

A parent in our NCT class summed it up perfectly "going on holiday with a baby or toddler is not a holiday"

The best you can hope for is help from the family so that you can grab some time to yourself and maybe an evening out

We’ve been on holidays abroad twice a year since both DDs were tiny. Never occurred to us not to. Had a blast every single time. We still got some rest, and the pleasure we get from seeing them happy is immeasurable. They are now 21 and 19, and we still love our family holidays - probably more temper tantrums nowadays but still fantastic. 😉

And never had babysitters or used holiday clubs etc. Can completely understand why some families do, but after working fulltime, it was a great chance to spend time with our children.

Not sure we could have done it with just hand luggage though!

@burnthur5t

A parent in our NCT class summed it up perfectly "going on holiday with a baby or toddler is not a holiday"

The best you can hope for is help from the family so that you can grab some time to yourself and maybe an evening out

I just don’t think that’s true, unless someone literally can’t imagine a holiday that doesn’t involve hiking the Inca trail or sunbathing all day and clubbing all night.

Once I made my own rules for holidays I did start to enjoy it - the big problems always came from kind generous relatives taking us on holiday with them to places and accommodation that was incredibly unfriendly for toddlers, also without understanding that dh would be so stressed being away that he'd go to bed for the week.

Once I learned to make my own plans and to refuse gifts that weren't helpful, it was a lot better.

I thought Playdoh worked well for travelling, though I'd never realised how strongly it smelled until I opened some on a plane! Making some salt dough might be better.

We're currently on 'holiday'. Well, staying in native country with family and it most certainly is not as relaxing as I would have liked the flight was horrendous but we got through it as it was a relatively short flight. Depends on your airline but you usually can take a baby bag a free extra? I had mine filled with toys, crayons, books and snacks etc. not that he played with any of it whilst kicking off on the plane!

@RaskolnikovsGarret

And never had babysitters or used holiday clubs etc. Can completely understand why some families do, but after working fulltime, it was a great chance to spend time with our children.

Not sure we could have done it with just hand luggage though!

I have been thinking about the hand luggage situation. We do get 2x carry ons + 2x rucksacks though and there is a fairly reasonably priced launderette 5 mins walk from the hotel. Was hoping that would cut down on the number of clothes we'd have to take.

We would always make sure we balanced our days, so maybe pool time in the morning, a castle in the afternoon. We took a 2 year old to Alcatraz! She just slept in the pram but loved the boat ride over and a run around outside the prison.

If your toddler still naps I’d aim to eat grown up lunch while they sleep and if you have to grab something quick for dinner you won’t feel like you’ve missed out. Manage your expectations that it won’t be at all like pre child travel and you can still enjoy it.

Of course it’s fun to go on holiday, that’s mostly the point.

You don’t skip fun for years on end because you happen to have a toddler at the time.

My holidays have been pretty much the same pre children, post children, whatever. Just with more people along for the ride.