To fear a family member is accessing our medical records

[durdledoo]

I'm not really sure what to do about this and would love some practical advice to stop this potentially happening.
My mil is a nurse, she works at the local surgeries that me, my husband and my children attend. She has previously gone through my husbands medical notes before and confronted him on health complications he's had in the past and not told her about (this was a long time ago, but he was in his early twenties at the time).
A few comments recently has be concerned she's done it again. My husband had 2 drs apts and we only told her about one. She / fil has asked me several times now if dh is okay and asked about his second drs apt (that we haven't even discussed with them)
They know about one health issue and he's openly discussed it with them but the other is very private.
The other day mil said "how is dh, is he okay" and I just replied "yes, he went down and has been referred" (discussing said health issues we've told them about) and she said "well, he went down again didn't he?" Basically prying into the outcome of this second apt she should know nothing about.

I can't prove anything, but considering previous and the fact she's digging (a lot) and acting very stand off-ish I am legitimately concerned she's been at our medical notes (or at least dh's) but i wouldn't put it past her to look through all of ours. We've had lots of ongoing problems in the past with boundaries and the relationship has never been simple.

Is there anything I can do. Would loving surgery completely help? She works all over locally so I fear not.

Can we ask the surgery to make out information inaccessible to her?

Looking for some practical steps I could take to protect our privacy. There's absolutely no point raising this with her, she will inevitably deny it and previously when she went through her adult sons records he was the one "in trouble" for not telling her about his health concerns...

I work at the surgery my husband is registered at. I know all his medical history anyway but I was told when he registerd I MUST NOT access his records, I can't order meds for him, make an appointment or even scan hospital letters onto his record, I have to ask colleagues to do it. Someone has told me the PM can electronically stop me accessing his record (we use EMIS) but she doesn't know how and is prepared to trust me.

@vivainsomnia

Of course she's accessed his records, there's no way she'd know about the 2nd appt otherwise That's not true. It sounds that all she knows is that he had another appointment. There will be list of patients appointments on that day and are might know that way.

That's not illegal, just as many practices have your name flashing on a screen to invite you to go in, or even just th doctor calling your name in front of everyone waiting.

It will only be illegal if she went on his record but then she would know all the details so would not need to ask.

She's done it before. This is why I'm worried. She's done it before and openly told her adult son off "I've accessed your private records and you are in trouble for not telling me about this health concern". This was before I was on the scene. If I KNEW 100% that she had done it again; I'd tell the surgery. Whatever the outcome may be. She knows this. I'm on the scene now, she can't tell us she knows but she can pester us until we tell her then she can openly stick her ore in.

@incognitoforthisone

whenever one of us is remotely poorly they always know and she regularly comes round with various devices, tests, stuff she's taken from the surgery so she can give us her very own check up

I'm no expert but ... this also sounds like something a registered nurse should absolutely not be doing?!

I think she has asked if she can borrow stuff and bring it back. The Gp's allow it

Many posters seem to be missing the point - it doesn't matter how she knows about her DS's appointment, she should not then be asking him about it.
What if he hadn't even told the OP he had been for the appointment? It breaks his confidentiality.

Whether she looked up the information, a member of staff or a patient mentioned they had seen him, it's not ok for her to then approach the patient in question! Regardless if it's her son!

@MsSquiz

Many posters seem to be missing the point - it doesn't matter how she knows about her DS's appointment, she should not then be asking him about it. What if he hadn't even told the OP he had been for the appointment? It breaks his confidentiality.

Whether she looked up the information, a member of staff or a patient mentioned they had seen him, it's not ok for her to then approach the patient in question! Regardless if it's her son!

Thank you. I feel like it's worth mentioning it wasn't until I told my husband that his mum was asking after him and his apts and his eyes were about to pop out his sockets and he said "how does she even know about my second apt" that I became worried. He thought I'd blimmen told her

Very unprofessional if she is doing that.
Move surgeries if you don't want to report her.

Talk to the surgery - they will be able to tell you with certainly whether she has accessed the records of anyone in your family. Otherwise you will keep wondering.

DS works in a hospital and said the other week “X (a former colleague of mine”) is a patient here and says hello. But DS was at pains to clarify with X first that he wanted DS to tell me he was in hospital. And I dont know - and DS would nt tell me if I asked - what X was in for. I dont even know if he’s out now (cured or died).

Boundaries, and make sure she is clear that you have an expectation of privacy and confidentiality over medical records. Next time she asks maybe a high level shot across the bow that you have concerns about the privacy of DH medical records, what would the outcome if you complained? Let her think about it and maybe she will wind it in.

It's a mother thing. When mine came to stay any post which looked like medical info she would open and read, and then claim she thought it was for her. Even though she does not live here. We had a chat and no longer a problem.

It would be easy for her 10 years ago to access your DHs notes probably they were paper records and now that records are electronic theye will be a records of who accessed them.

At the risk of sounding brutal why are you worried about her losing her job? She's doing something that she KNOWS is a sackable offence but still thinks she is above the rules. If she's accessing your family records who else could she be accessing: neighbours, friends, etc?

If she loses her job that is on her, not you. You're talking about making your own life, and that of your family, more complicated (by moving to a different practice) just to appease her and her unlawful behaviour.

@Username916

If she's a nurse that works there too is it not entirely possible she was looking at the appointment screen and saw his name? It's common for nurses to look forward and to look at the doctors screens if they need to book an appointment for a patient.

You can contact the practice manager and have your records restricted from her, it's not difficult and they will do it discreetly. They can easily look to see if she has accessed the actual records also.

This. Although people working in health care are not permitted to disclose to a third party whether or not a particular individual has an appointment, staff members can often see a range of appointment screens. Your MIL could therefore have found out innocently that her son had another appointment.

An audit trail would show whether she had accessed his records under her own log-in, though she could have got round that by asking a colleague to open his notes, in which case it will still be obvious if someone other than the clinician who saw your DH had peeked at his records for no good reason. It's not difficult to add an extra layer of security whereby anyone accessing a particular patient's notes has to go through an additional screen and actively tick a box to say what their reason is (best interest of patient, public interest etc.) and it would be good practice for this to be applied to the notes of all family members of staff as well as to staff members who are also patients of the practice.

Your mother in law is breaching confidentiality. I can understand the temptation to look at the records of loved ones but the very least she can do is keep it to herself, not mention it to her or your husband and you. It is, frankly, appalling and if her bosses found out, she would lose her job.

You and your husband do need to speak to her about this, honestly. I know it's difficult but it has to be done.

In your husband's position I would find another GP practice, register there and not tell her. She will find out eventually but not for a while. If the admin staff, "Oh your son is leaving us....", they too are breaching confidentiality. I'm hoping you do not live in a very remote area with only one accessible surgery.

I think confront your MIL if you want to. If you go to the practice manager she will be fired and I think that would destroy your family relationships. So that would be a massive step. Think about how you would like the relationship between you and MIL to be in the future and get on the same page with your DH. Your MIL is definitely wrong to be looking at your records but do you want her to be fired and humiliated or just to stop doing it and show more respect for you both as adults.

Can you not approach the practice manager and ask for your whole family’s records to be restricted from her - for security and peace of mind.

All she needs to be told is that updated security “policy” (vague comments about new privacy updates and requirements, etc) demands that any employee not be permitted access to any of their own family member’s files.

You would have your records inaccessible to her, and she can’t complain about it as she wasn’t supposed to have accessed them anyway….

Just to add it would make no difference which surgery you were at.
The current electronic system allows me access to all records. I work in the community so need to access patient’s notes from all over my area.

@LagunaBubbles

It would be easy for her 10 years ago to access your DHs notes probably they were paper records and now that records are electronic theye will be a records of who accessed them.

I thought this would be the case. I do wonder if she'd have the nerve now it's all electronic. Could be a huge coincidence she knows he's got something else going on. Mothers instinct (clutches at straws)

If you make a complaint then they will be able to view the records and see if she has accessed them. This would be the proof you would need - they wouldn't uphold your complaint if the evidence wasn't there and it's impossible to access a record without there being a trail. I've had this problem too as my mother is a practice nurse but this was in the days when records were in paper form and my Doctor then kept my files in his room. He told me he was doing this rather than me requesting it.

Personally, I would take this up with the Practice Manager. You don't need to tell them who you think is accessing my files. You can say that you have concerns about future confidentiality and would like your files to be locked up to a high level of seniority.

The other thing I would do is really wind your MIL up. She will hate this and it gives you the upper hand. Do not cave and tell her any details. You and your husband have a right to privacy. I also wouldn't tell her about every minor medical issue you, your DH or DC have...it gives her too much power.

@ThreeKneeRepeater

Just to add it would make no difference which surgery you were at. The current electronic system allows me access to all records. I work in the community so need to access patient’s notes from all over my area.

I did wonder. Thanks for clarifying. Should've emigrated when we had the chance

@ThreeKneeRepeater

Just to add it would make no difference which surgery you were at. The current electronic system allows me access to all records. I work in the community so need to access patient’s notes from all over my area.

That is true but would she go that far? It would be so obviously nosey, not like just coming across some information.

@Nap1983

It’s a big rush for her to be accessing records online. They are audited and would probably flag up you searching The same surname as yourself. I know nurses who have been disciplined even for accessing their own

I agree with this.

If you have online access to your own records through your surgery then you can check when they were accessed and for what reason. It's worth looking to see if you can confirm your suspicions.

@SunnySideDownBriefly

If you make a complaint then they will be able to view the records and see if she has accessed them. This would be the proof you would need - they wouldn't uphold your complaint if the evidence wasn't there and it's impossible to access a record without there being a trail. I've had this problem too as my mother is a practice nurse but this was in the days when records were in paper form and my Doctor then kept my files in his room. He told me he was doing this rather than me requesting it.

Personally, I would take this up with the Practice Manager. You don't need to tell them who you think is accessing my files. You can say that you have concerns about future confidentiality and would like your files to be locked up to a high level of seniority.

The other thing I would do is really wind your MIL up. She will hate this and it gives you the upper hand. Do not cave and tell her any details. You and your husband have a right to privacy. I also wouldn't tell her about every minor medical issue you, your DH or DC have...it gives her too much power.

Thank you for that information. If I can just quietly make our records private from her completely that would be ideal. I don't think she would care about her neighbours and friends but she has always had boundary problems. Sh*t when my husband was living there whilst at uni he's wake up to her say next to him with the latest vaccine he "needed" and get jabbed regardless of whether he wanted to. She just doesn't respect that he's an adult

I wouldnt give a shit about her job. She knows the rules, everyone gets told not to access certain records.

I'd go to every practice manager of every surgery she goes to and tell them what she is potentially doing and insist on a check being done.

If she has been doing it and loses her job, that's on her being a twat, not you.

OP

Next time she asks a question you don't think she should have knowledge of, call her out on it.

Don't mess about. It doesn't have to be aggressive....

A "how do you know about that?"
"We haven't mentioned that to you yet"
"We're keeping that to ourselves until we know more, how come you're aware of it"

All those questions are reasonable.. don't ignore it.

@KohlaParasaurus she may have "innocently" seen the screen but she should not have brought it up.

It is up to the patient - in this case her son - to mention himself to her that he had an appointment.

If he doesn't bring it up she must never mention it. That is part of the ethics of her job.