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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Not to share the inheritance?

80 replies

Lauren1983 · 01/03/2022 20:41

My great grandfather died a decade ago. Me and several siblings plus my cousins were left various shares. We all received the money from the shares when we all turned 18 however it has come to light that there was a share left. We have been told it will be a low 4 figure sum each.

My mother has said that me and my siblings should give whatever money we receive to her mother (my grandfathers daughter) or to her instead.

I don't really want to give up whatever money I get as I have a few money problems and it could really help me. My parents had a inheritance of roughly 200k last year so are not in desperate need.

WIBU to keep my share? For clarity none of my siblings are well off either.

OP posts:
MichelleScarn · 01/03/2022 20:43

If the will says its your share its your share, you can choose to give it away, but noone can tell you too.

MorrisZapp · 01/03/2022 20:44

What is her reason for this?

Original poster
Lauren1983 · 01/03/2022 20:47

The reason is that if it several grand for each of us it will be more then the inheritance that she received as she received her inheritance in money not shares.

OP posts:
ohhooh · 01/03/2022 20:49

You parents got 200k last year so can't be in a huge need for the money can they?

Genuinely I wouldn't give it to them, especially if you have need of it in your life.

It was always your inheritance, it just so happens a bit got left behind when the first part was handed out. It's always been yours - not your parents or anyone else's.

Georgeskitchen · 01/03/2022 20:49

No you're not being unreasonable. It's you're inheritance!!

TurquoiseDragon · 01/03/2022 20:50

@Lauren1983

The reason is that if it several grand for each of us it will be more then the inheritance that she received as she received her inheritance in money not shares.
That's just tough shit, then.

Your great grandfather chose to write his will this way, so do what you like with the money.

drpet49 · 01/03/2022 20:51

Nope don’t give her a penny

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 01/03/2022 20:53

So it’s your grandmother who your mother wants you to give the money to?

If your grandmother is in need, why can’t your mum give her money?

Bringsexyback · 01/03/2022 20:54

When I write my will I expect the money to go to the people I leave it to I’d come back and haunt you if you gave it to anybody else, it’s for you not your mother

Original poster
Lauren1983 · 01/03/2022 20:56

Yes it is my grandmother that she wants us to give the money to. I'm not aware my grandmother has any money issues.

OP posts:
Riverlee · 01/03/2022 20:58

It can only be distributed according to the terms of the will. If the individual recipients what to gift it to someone else, then they can. However, they are not obliged to.

Libraryghost · 01/03/2022 20:59

If your grandmother is experiencing money issues you can choose to help her as a family but DON'T give up your inheritance. It was left to you. Tell your Mum no.

Nelliephant1 · 01/03/2022 20:59

It's down to who the money/shares were left to in the will. If it was you and your generation then that's how it should stay. Your mother has no right to interfere of dictate how you use your inheritance.

KindlyKanga · 01/03/2022 21:01

It's up to you. The people who received cash could have invested that in shares if they had wanted.

MrsSkylerWhite · 01/03/2022 21:04

He made his will for his own reasons. They should be respected.

Easterbunnyiswindowshopping · 01/03/2022 21:04

Wow Cfers do come in all ages don't they?

2DogsOnMySofa · 01/03/2022 21:06

If it's being left to you in the will then it's yours. Unless you want to or can afford to then I'd keep it. They've just had 200k!

AxolotlEars · 01/03/2022 21:19

is there a reason your mum can't support her mum financially?

Original poster
Lauren1983 · 01/03/2022 21:19

She has said that one of my cousins is giving her father half of her share so I think this is also influencing her.

My mother won't take it well if I don't give her at least half and is likely to cut me out of the family so I have to weigh up if it is just best to keep her happy.

OP posts:
CushionSpiral · 01/03/2022 21:23

If she’ll cut you out of the family for this, then it sounds like there are other issues at play and take the opportunity to get out from their clutches. This is not normal behaviour, you owe the, nothing. There was a reason your great grandfather chose to skip them, listen to him and live your own life.

IvorCutler · 01/03/2022 21:25

My MIL made her children give her their inheritance when her ex husband died (it wasn’t much and she already had a house and money in the bank while her kids were all renting with nothing to their name). Some people are so contrary/selfish. It’s obviously a matter of principal for her but it’s incredibly shitty. Take your money.

Chilledchablis1 · 01/03/2022 21:26

Your mother would cut you out if your family over a relatively low amount of money that has been left to you ?
Are there other problems?

Easterbunnyiswindowshopping · 01/03/2022 21:27

If she cuts you out that sounds like a bonus to keeping the cash! She is trying to steal from you op!! Emotionally blackmailing you is theft imo!
Keep the money. Ditch the bitch.

yoyo1234 · 01/03/2022 21:29

You're mum's behaviour is despicable if she is going to bully you into handing over what is yours.

Original poster
Lauren1983 · 01/03/2022 21:30

There are problems in that she is very critical and negative so it is very hard to please her

OP posts: