Not to share the inheritance?

[Lauren1983]

My great grandfather died a decade ago. Me and several siblings plus my cousins were left various shares. We all received the money from the shares when we all turned 18 however it has come to light that there was a share left. We have been told it will be a low 4 figure sum each.

My mother has said that me and my siblings should give whatever money we receive to her mother (my grandfathers daughter) or to her instead.

I don't really want to give up whatever money I get as I have a few money problems and it could really help me. My parents had a inheritance of roughly 200k last year so are not in desperate need.

WIBU to keep my share? For clarity none of my siblings are well off either.

You say your parents received £200k last year - was it her or was it your dad and now she is jealous?

Tbh if you need it then you need it. Chuck her £20 if you feel the need to share - but why should money left to you, that would really help you out, go to someone who seemingly has so much. Maybe speak to you grandmother- see what she thinks. Would she actually take the cash from you? would she give it to your mother? Would your grandmother cut you out over a few quid?

Sounds like there is alot of crap going on in the family anyway.

So disengage. Cut calls if she becomes awful. Leave /go home if you are with her. Show her you aren't accepting being bullied.
Just because she is your dm does not mean you have to accept this treatment.. Would you treat your dd like this?

@Lauren1983

There are problems in that she is very critical and negative so it is very hard to please her

Stop trying to please her - you will never manage it. And only make yourself more miserable trying. Stop competing for her affection and you will likely find yourself in a better place.

@Lauren1983

Yes it is my grandmother that she wants us to give the money to. I'm not aware my grandmother has any money issues.

So she will inherit it. Obvs.

Could you tell her that you are about to be evicted due to late payments or something, to show you really need the money?

You shouldn’t have to, it would be great to tell her to mind her own business but I can see you why you may not want to.

Yes it was my dad who inherited but it is joint money and my mum has benefitted from it.

My grandmother originally said she was pleased that we were getting extra so not sure if she would take it.

I don't think saying I'm being evicted will help as she knows I need the money for a new boiler. I have a child so the lack of heat/hot water is hurting her too. I believe my mother would spend it on a holiday or another weekend away staying in the Ritz.

That money has been left for you. You absolutely don't need to give a penny to her or anyone else. It's awful that she expects this from you and your siblings.

when you say "a share left" - does that mean all of the other shares were named and gifted to great grandchildren, or was his share portfolio in total was divided between you all - and the existence of this particular share wasn't known about until recently?

She clearly has no idea how inheritance tax works.

From an inheritance tax point of view it makes sense to pass wealth down, not up.

@Lauren1983

There are problems in that she is very critical and negative so it is very hard to please her

Don't waste your time trying

It is a newly discovered share that me, my siblings and cousins are the names benefactors of.

Gift it to your daughter - put it in a child savings account (so you maintain some control). Save a bit back for the boiler, because you both need to be warm.

Better your DD has it than her greedy gran.

Can you explain that you’ve got money worries

Also - only one share worth mega bucks?
Is it a Bitcoin?!

(Nosey)

It might be bitcoin! It probably is shares rather than a share. Sorry I'm not too au fait with stocks and shares etc. I'm leaving it to the solicitor to sort!

Let her have half on the condition that she gives you the equivalent amount from her inheritance. She can’t say that’s not fair. Share and share alike.

@GroggyLegs

Gift it to your daughter - put it in a child savings account (so you maintain some control). Save a bit back for the boiler, because you both need to be warm.

Better your DD has it than her greedy gran.

Why should she give her inheritance to her daughter? Her daughter will inherit herself in the future. The OP needs that money now.

Well it’s not your mum’s business and you need to tell her to keep her beak out.

could you speak to your grandmother and tell her what your mum is suggesting? She might be horrified and tell your mum not to be so ridiculous?

If your mum and dad got £200K last year and are happy to see their daughter and granddaughter freeze for the lack of a new boiler, I’d assume that being cut off from them might be a blessing.

@Lauren1983

I don't think saying I'm being evicted will help as she knows I need the money for a new boiler. I have a child so the lack of heat/hot water is hurting her too. I believe my mother would spend it on a holiday or another weekend away staying in the Ritz.

Please keep it and spend it on your house OP. Your mother sounds like a grabby greedy cow and too much wouldn’t be enough.

Not only is it yours, but your mother’s threats mean that if you complied with her demands, there’d be no guarantee that she still wouldn’t cut you out of her will for some slight or other. Or nothing.

Odd.

I can understand this request if you're granny was unfairly punished by your great grandfather? If no one needs the money it's symbolic?

It's yours by right. You are hard up. Your parents have inherited a good amount. Three reasons to keep it. Cant think of one reason you should give it away. If your Mum thinks yur grandmother needs money she can give her some of her money. People are too good at trying to persuade others to part with money while keeping a tight hold on their own.