Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Husband txt picture of our ill child to another woman

105 replies

youhearditherefirst · 26/02/2022 02:19

I found out my husband was txting another woman whilst sat at our ill child's bedside in hospital.
His txts were all about getting sympathy. She wasn't responding so he sent her a picture of our child hooked up to machines and very ill no doubt to get a reaction.

He has tried to make out I'm overacting by being utterly disgusted by this and not being able to forgive him. So everyone - aibu?

OP posts:
oakleaffy · 26/02/2022 08:43

@youhearditherefirst

They are much better and home now. Thank you Xx
That’s a relief! Get shot of the creepy husband.

My Husband had an obsession with a woman at work.
It did not end well.

Kick him out.

User112 · 26/02/2022 08:46

That’s disrespectful to you and your child IN SO MANY LEVELS.

Why are you still with him when he is openly trying his chances with other women? You deserve better OP.

HaveringWavering · 26/02/2022 08:53

He’s appalling. This would be game over for me.

AllOfUsAreDead · 26/02/2022 08:54

He is vile, get rid of him.

And please don't come back saying he is a good father. He's not. Good father's don't send pictures of their ill child to a woman they fancy in hopes of sympathy sex.

CaMePlaitPas · 26/02/2022 08:56

Ugh get rid. I'm glad to hear your dc is better though x

Houseplantmad · 26/02/2022 09:01

So he wasn't thinking about your child, wasn't thinking about you and wasn't thinking about the women who'd previously told him where to get off. It was all about him so at least you know now who is at the centre of his world.

He sounds pathetic and very unlikeable.

3luckystars · 26/02/2022 09:01

Appalling. I’m sorry your child was ill and am glad they are doing ok.

Wheresthebeach · 26/02/2022 09:03

Well that’s vile. Trying to get a sympathy shag ? And you are putting up with this why?

He will cheat on you, he’s harassing a woman he fancies, and he’s manipulative. And I hope soon to be unemployed.

VelvetChairGirl · 26/02/2022 09:03

@youhearditherefirst

She is a co-worker he has feelings for, she shot him down and he continued to txt her sporadically which she ignored - I've seen the txts!

He then txt her about our child. When she wasn't engaging he sent the picture.

have you spoken to her?

I would advise she get management involved he is harassing her, unless he is management in which case she should get police involved.

why the hell are you putting up with him?

gingerbiscuits · 26/02/2022 09:11

@SarahBellam

Your DH is a creep on four counts: Trying to cheat on you, harassing a woman who told him she’s not interested and trying to manipulate her in the worst way to get her to respond, invading your child’s privacy when they were at their most vulnerable, and minimising and gaslighting you about it. Any one of those on their own is despicable, but taken together they amount to a picture of an awful, selfish, vile excuse for a man. He has shown you who he is. Believe him.
100% this! Vile excuse for a man. Kick his ass out.
LightfoldEngines · 26/02/2022 09:13

@SarahBellam

Your DH is a creep on four counts: Trying to cheat on you, harassing a woman who told him she’s not interested and trying to manipulate her in the worst way to get her to respond, invading your child’s privacy when they were at their most vulnerable, and minimising and gaslighting you about it. Any one of those on their own is despicable, but taken together they amount to a picture of an awful, selfish, vile excuse for a man. He has shown you who he is. Believe him.
This. Get rid.
TracyMosby · 26/02/2022 09:15

Wow. Has she reported him to HR?

grapewine · 26/02/2022 09:21

@OlympicProcrastinator

Why are you even with a man who is texting another woman ‘he has feelings for?’ That should be enough for you to get rid. But to add into the mix he’s a pest and using your sick child for sympathy, invading their privacy and dignity is absolutely fucking appalling! Do not waste another day of your life with this cretin.
All of this! He would be out the door.
newnameforthis76 · 26/02/2022 09:24

@youhearditherefirst

She is a co-worker he has feelings for, she shot him down and he continued to txt her sporadically which she ignored - I've seen the txts!

He then txt her about our child. When she wasn't engaging he sent the picture.

So, as well as using photos of your sick child to get another woman’s attention, he is also harassing her. She’s told him she’s not interested and he continues to text her? And she has to work with him?!

OP, this man has no redeeming features in any of this. You really need to get shot of him. He’s an awful, awful man who harasses women, attempts to instigate affairs, and tries to use his own child’s serious illness to get attention from a woman he seems to be practically stalking. And now he’s gaslighting you to claim you’re overreacting?

You and your child deserve better.

grapewine · 26/02/2022 09:24

@TracyMosby

Wow. Has she reported him to HR?
I hope so. She definitely should. Complete creep.
LowlandLucky · 26/02/2022 09:25

Oh my, he sounds so much like my ex. You need to get rid of him now, he will break you down until you don't know which way is up, he will ruin your child/rens childhoods. Please run now before he does anymore damage.

Queenkarm · 26/02/2022 09:27

OP pleased your dc is better and back home. Now today you gather black bags, fill said black bags with dh stuff throw black bags outside swiftly followed by dh. He is an absolute bastard txting another woman for sympathy instead of supporting you and your very poorly dc. Let him txt a selfie with his black bags to the woman
Pathetic selfish piece of work. It is now 9.25 please come back at 10.25 to say you have kicked his arse out of your life. Xxx

Kate0902900908 · 26/02/2022 09:33

Firstly I hope your child is feeling better, how awful to see your child in that position. Secondly YANBU to feel absolutely disgusted by your partners actions.
I’ve read your reply’s to others and it appears your partner has left the relationship emotionally. You need to really consider if you want or if it’s worth continuing because his morals have gone. He used his own child to try and get attention from another women, in your child’s must vulnerable state. For me this is unforgivable. I’m so sorry your going through this X

Gilly12345 · 26/02/2022 09:36

Your DH sounds like a sorry excuse of a man.
You and your child(ren) deserve better.
I would give him a red card and boot him out.

peacocktail · 26/02/2022 09:38

What a Bastard. I would never be able to get passed that one. You have every right to be furious, I am furious for you.

DoctorManhattan · 26/02/2022 09:39

Time to get rid. When your child was lying on hospital he should only have been concentrating on that and not his sexual and romantic desires for someone else. Never mind all that’s wrong with cheating on you. A sorry, selfish waste of a man.

Ttcfinalbub · 26/02/2022 09:39

His nads would be getting stamped until he was in a hospital bed, then maybe be can send her that too ?

billy1966 · 26/02/2022 09:41

How utterly repulsive he is.

LagunaBubbles · 26/02/2022 09:41

Why are you with a man who openly has feelings for another woman? Confused

BearOfEasttown · 26/02/2022 09:45

@OlympicProcrastinator

Why are you even with a man who is texting another woman ‘he has feelings for?’ That should be enough for you to get rid. But to add into the mix he’s a pest and using your sick child for sympathy, invading their privacy and dignity is absolutely fucking appalling! Do not waste another day of your life with this cretin.
This. ^ Do not stay with this man @youhearditherefirst