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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Partner refusing booster so can’t go on holiday?

106 replies

KerkyraBlue · 23/02/2022 14:02

My partner has been double jabbed but is refusing the booster for reasons I am not totally clear on…is very cross at Pfizer /Moderna, money makers, don’t want a heart attack etc.

We are supposed to be going to the Netherlands in April for a short break with our son. As far as I understand, Netherlands require UK visitors to be fully vaccinated including the booster. He won’t have it even if that means we can’t go away. I am blooming fuming. This trip has been arranged for ages and already been rearranged once.

I could go with my son anyway but I am still really annoyed at my other half for potentially ruining a holiday for some belief about Pfizer and Moderna that most of the population do not share.

Is it just me or would you be annoyed too?

OP posts:

CrimbleCrumble1 · 23/02/2022 14:41

It’s his choice, if he doesn’t want to go on the holiday then it’s up to him. Don’t let his decision impact your plans.

Lazypuppy · 23/02/2022 14:47

His choice, you carry on anf go anf he can stay at home.

fairylightsandwaxmelts · 23/02/2022 14:48

His choice.

I would go without him.

Theonlyoneiknow · 23/02/2022 14:49

Everyone is entitled to their own choice and as said above - couples should compromise. Either go on your own with your son, or go somewhere where vaccination status doesn't matter. My DH and I have different opinions on the vaccine - I wouldn't leave him/him leave me just because of that (those suggestions are crazy IMHO)

Chloemol · 23/02/2022 14:50

I would just go without him, and i would leave a long list of jobs for him to do whilst I am away

fairylightsandwaxmelts · 23/02/2022 14:50

Because they're a couple and couples compromise.

Compromise isn't forcing someone else to change their holiday plans, though.

If he'd refused to go because he'd seen their terrorist threat level was higher than he thought or because they had high covid cases and he was worried would he be an arse then?

But the point is - he can think what he likes but he can't force OP to cancel the holiday or change plans. If my DH was worried about the terror threat or number of cases, I'd tell him to stay home but I wouldn't cancel MY holiday as a result.

He believes he's protecting himself by not getting the jab. That doesn't make him an arse.

He can believe what he likes, but then he can't complain when his choices have negative consequences.

Dixiechickonhols · 23/02/2022 14:51

Go without him? If your child is little maybe leave him with dp (assuming dp is his dad) and go with a friend instead.

CurtainTroubles · 23/02/2022 14:52

This reply has been deleted

Withdrawn at the user's request

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 23/02/2022 14:52

How old is your son?

If he’s old enough that holidays are not a complete drag, then I’d go anyway without your DH. His choice, his consequences.

If not perhaps move the trip to another nearby country that doesn’t require the same jabs.

I’m in the same situation but in my case working to get my teen a booster in time - she had the 2nd jab in very early December so should be ok!

Nanny0gg · 23/02/2022 14:57

@Theonlyoneiknow

Dunno.

If it's to do with conspiracy theories then it's a pretty fundamental difference

ChocolateMassacre · 23/02/2022 14:58

I'd go without him but I wouldn't be annoyed. It's his choice but he doesn't get to inflict the consequence on everyone else. Do you have a friend/family member who might like to come with you?

Blossomtoes · 23/02/2022 15:00

I’m in the go without him camp.

Divebar2021 · 23/02/2022 15:04

I have 2 questions - What is he expecting to happen? Has he apologised for the disruption to the family holiday?

SartresSoul · 23/02/2022 15:08

My DH has refused the booster for the same reason. He watches a cardiologist on YouTube who basically said the Pfizer jab is more risky for a healthy man in his 20s than covid ever would be due to the risk of myocarditis so that was it for him. He had the first two jabs but just doesn’t see why he needs a booster anyway. We had covid a couple of months ago and he was completely asymptomatic so that has furthered his belief that it’s totally pointless. I can’t be bothered arguing so haven’t.

girlmom21 · 23/02/2022 15:08

@fairylightsandwaxmelts but the OP hasn't mentioned anything about his feelings. He's not forcing or complaining at all like you're suggesting he is, from what the OP has said.

purplecorkheart · 23/02/2022 15:10

His choice. I assume that he does not expect you all to cancel.

james83 · 23/02/2022 15:11

He has had main 2 jabs, Very Sensible.
Then he becomes an arse and threatens to ruin a family holiday Mainly because directors might make a profit.
Do look at share price chart for those companies, they are NOT rocketing.

fairylightsandwaxmelts · 23/02/2022 15:11

[quote girlmom21]@fairylightsandwaxmelts but the OP hasn't mentioned anything about his feelings. He's not forcing or complaining at all like you're suggesting he is, from what the OP has said. [/quote]
Yes, I know.

I was responding to another poster who said that the holiday should be cancelled/altered to accommodate him.

azimuth299 · 23/02/2022 15:12

When you ask him why, what does he say? He must feel quite strongly if he's willing to forgo his holiday rather than have it.

It's his body and his choice, but that doesn't mean that you can't go on the holiday. Take your son and have a nice time.

girlmom21 · 23/02/2022 15:13

@fairylightsandwaxmelts that was me. You'd quoted my posts and said he was forcing and complaining when I'd simply said if I was Op I'd rearrange the holiday and go elsewhere.
Not for him, but so they could holiday as a family.

james83 · 23/02/2022 15:15

@SartresSoul. Only one Cardiologist and not very professional to go on YouTube.
Would have more validity if in scientific journal to be challenged by his Peers.

Glamping1234 · 23/02/2022 15:16

Oh gosh this is what I'm dreading. Only because I had both vaccines and was so unwell for days after them so now I am very apprehensive getting the booster. I had covid I'm December but have put of getting the booster since. However, if going holiday required a booster, I would have it and just hope it didn't make me feel so awful this time.

OP if he won't change his mind and rules don't change by then, I guess I would go ahead without him.

YanTanTetheraPetheraPimp · 23/02/2022 15:17

I would simply go without him and enjoy my holiday.

RishiRich · 23/02/2022 15:18

I'd be annoyed but go without him anyway. No reason you and your DS should miss out.

CrimbleCrumble1 · 23/02/2022 15:19

Glamping1234 I was really ill with my first jab and a bit iffy with the second but then absolutely fine with the booster. I’d had Covid 6 weeks before.

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