Hello
I am currently seeing someone and I don't know what to think.
We were only together for 2 months and thinking back, he claimed he was in love with me after our first date, asked me to marry him and he was so keen for me to meet his two kids and have a sleepover. I thought he was lovely and told him i loved him also after a week and started accepting the "marriage proposals". I did put my foot down at meeting his kids right away, I didnt think that was right and their mum should have been aware of that (they are divorced).
Anyway, after 4 weeks I agree to a sleepover with the kids. It was lovely. I know it was wrong too. Then he stared asking me to move in and that he was thinking of looking at better jobs so we could buy a bigger house. I know these are red flags :( but I got caught up in it all and started imagining a life with this guy. I should note he has really bad mental health.
Anyway, we had an argument (i started it) and he claimed that my argument had pushed him into a bad state. So he asked for a week of space so he could work on himself. I agreed. I found it hard as all of the lovey texts stopped. I went over to his house and we spoke. Then he messaged me a few days later saying he needed more space because I didnt respect boundaries. I asked how long and he said 1 month. I was really taken back as we have only been together 2 months. He said if I didnt agree he would have to end things. So I agreed but kept contacting him. We then had a pregnancy scare which he told me he wanted to forget all other issues, they were all trivially now and he can't wait to meet up when we get good news (that im not pregnant). Turns out I wasn't and I excitedly asked him when we would meet, he then said he didn't know. He said he needed time to get better (because of his mental health) and think about us because his therapist said he isn't in a good place for a relationship. He said because of this he is having 2nd thoughts but wants to take this month to think and not make any rash decisions.
I told him I felt done and that I wanted to walk away, he asked if I wanted to end things or "is it because you can't wait". I said i could but there is no middleground. He then said that maybe we should end things. I said I thought it would be best but maybe we would feel differently after space. He said yes and that we should catch up in 1 month. I asked if we were finished or if we were taking this time to think. He ignored me. I then messaged him again and asked him to clarify. He said he didn't know and that he needed time and space to know that. He then asked me "do you want to end things now so you can move on". I said no, i wanted to clarify the situation. I then asked if we would take 1 month to think about things and he said yes.
But I'm thinking.. is he genuinely ill? Is he stringing me along, is this his mental health, was he love bombing at the begining. I feel so weak and stupid. I feel that I pester him now. I need some hard truth ladies, give it to me hard. I know this shout red flags.. I don't recognise this version of myself. Its only been two months. What am I even doing?!