To wonder what it would be like to be married to a Russian Ogliarch

[Southerngal5]

Just sitting here wfh freezing in my dressing gown & wondering what life would be like being married to a handsome ogliarch.. I can imagine myself living in Kingingston, kids in the best private schools, posh restaurants, travelling the world whenever...! Lighthearted by the way, love my dh😍

It's a fascinating life, I do however think I'd be squirelling away waiting for the divorce 😁

Would the ogliarch's kids all go to different private schools for security reasons?
I read before that many of the super wealthy Russian kids were expelled from boarding schools in Switzerland due to bad behavior

Well I'm actually related (by marriage) to the ex-wife and daughter of a powerful and very rich Russian (although I don't think he is technically considered an oligarch but I imagine they live the same lifestyles). Whilst married, the ex-wife had a great lifestyle when it came to the superficial stuff but was cheated on throughout her entire marriage. He also had an entire separate family hidden away, and then later married one of his mistresses. That marriage has also failed (shocker) due to his cheating. When his dd goes to visit him in Russia she has bodyguards with her 247, due to the risk of kidnapping. However, he paid for her £2,000,000 wedding and bought her her first home...a penthouse worth in the millions...so yeah, swings and roundabouts! It's a great existence if you can turn a blind eye to the cheating or until your get kidnapped 🤷🏻‍♀️🤣

I'm going to see if I can watch that somewhere, @Maireas. Messy relationship dramas of the fabulously wealthy are right up my street. I'd imagine if you had a child by a billionaire you'd assume you were financially set for life, but apparently not.

@Curioushorse, on the one hand I'd think 'poor kids, they sound unhappy' but on the other hand I'd be cursing them for being such arrogant little brats. A pastoral role in a boarding school probably wouldn't be for me!

It was absolutely fascinating, @Classica.
It began as a different programme, a chronicle of their lives, then he fell out with Putin and it all got messy - and dangerous. The relationship broke down and the Russian government took possession of her Chelsea home and evicted her and the children.

The PP who mentioned how 'bored' the wives and girlfriends she met struck a chord with me. I used to interact with some very wealthy people in my previous career and, almost without exception, that's the feeling I got about them, too (and not just the women, either, the men appeared similarly bored).

Almost none of the homes of these people I visited or worked within ever had any books of knowledge or curiosity - outside of the typical coffee table tomes that had clearly never even had their covers opened (I remember a couple of homes bearing unused coffee table books still wrapped in their protective cellophane covers).

Then I spent some time working with a Russian woman who was married to an oligarch-type who totally blew the stereotype out of the water. She was interesting, curious about everything and, perhaps most importantly interested in other people. She would come and sit in the kitchen with the staff, cook supper for herself and everyone else and have raucous conversations in any one of several languages. She sponsored the university degrees of several of her staff and once told me; 'If someone who's worked for me leaves because they've educated themselves enough to find a better offer, it makes me really happy'.

There were a few like this at DSs little school. The sheer panic on some of them when they got a grey hair or hit 40 (often they were second or third wives) was an education. Most didn’t really well (interior designers, life coaches, health product sellers).

One had a nanny per child and had been the (married) bosses secretary (that old cliche). She was actually very unpleasant (and nasty - and very rude - to her husband). When her husband got a new secretary she was furious that she was young and pretty (I met her - she was really nice too) and would drop into his office unannounced. She got a tennis coach and would be dressed to the nines with hair and makeup done all the time.

It must be exhausting!

handsome oligarch

Do they exist? 😆

I know I wouldn't want to be married to an oligarch. However I would like to rent a private ship to travel down the Nile, poirot style 😂 So lottery for me

@CourtRand

I know I wouldn't want to be married to an oligarch. However I would like to rent a private ship to travel down the Nile, poirot style 😂 So lottery for me

May I join you? We could wear large hats and white linen. I'll meet you on deck for a Singapore Sling 🍸

I do actually think it would be a shit life in my opinion. I always wish I had more money but would hate that lifestyle. I like working hard for what I have as it's a sense of pride when I get it but if your married to extreme money what do you have to be proud of?

Also I want to travel the world in a very different way than the mega rich. I would hate to sit on beaches or go to expensive resorts. I want to backpack and meet the real people and make new friends in hostels or at restaurants. Things someone so rich could never do again.

Really apart from designer labels and never having to do the dishes what do they get out of life? Also I would hate having a house full of people all the time!

Of course @Maireas hopefully someone can play some Jazz and we can watch the sun set and play rumy!

... And have more cocktails of course.

@HollowTalk

My sister worked for a very wealthy Russian family in the SE. She used to watch the wife carefully (knowing she'd never meet anyone like her again) and came to the conclusion that she (the wife) didn't actually think the people working for her were human.

This is interesting. I read an article about elite boarding schools and apparently they are taught that everybody else are practically subhuman www.theguardian.com/education/2021/aug/08/public-schoolboys-boris-johnson-sad-little-boys-richard-beard

@Skeam

I mean, I'm sure there are lots of happy, rich women I don't see why there wouldn't be but these women weren't. They reminded me of myself on anti-depressants, with everything a bit dulled, but in their case by wealth cushioning them, not drugs. I think everything seemed a bit samey to them -- they seemed like people looking out the window at a landscape that didn't interest them much.

There's loads of miserable, bored, poor women in this world too.

Money only makes you happier to a certain level. Once you've got financially comfortable the rest is just extra. I grew up very poor and strived very hard...by 35 I could afford to retire if I eked out an existence. I've continued working (not least as I don't want to eck out an existence) but the peace of mind that I don't need to worry about, for example rising energy costs is amazing. I also feel that if I won the lottery it really wouldn't make that much difference - I'd have nicer things but I really don't think it would change my perspective or what I do particularly. I dated a very rich man (almost a billionaire) for a couple of months and aside from him being quite down to earth (there was no crazyness), I realised access to some of that really wouldn't change much for me. I was disappointed he ended things before I got a trip on the private jet though.

This article a bit old - but the data still holds true I think www.theguardian.com/science/2010/sep/06/earnings-pay-happiness-research#:~:text=%C2%A350%2C000pa,-This%20article%20is&text=Money%20can't%20buy%20you,equivalent%20of%20around%20%C2%A350%2C000.

@hihellohihello

Scary. People don't get that rich and powerful by accident. Have you read / seen the documentaries about Alexandra Tolstoy-Miloslavsky?

Such an interesting documentary and proof that money doesn’t buy happiness. It’s on Netflix for anyone that wants to watch it.

Not a life for me. Imagine not knowing if by the end of each day you or your husband or children would be dead or kidnapped.

I've just watched the Alexandra Tolstoy doc on Netflix. Thanks for the recc. What a lot of stress and worry that life looks like. I loved that the doc started when they were still happily together and she was enraptured with their lifestyle and the fact that he'd chosen her.

But I'm going to have to disappoint any oligarchs who might be sniffing around me that I'm sadly unavailable to their attentions. The stress of that life would not be for me. Worrying Putin was sending some henchmen after you.

Also, loved the contrast with her first husband who seemed considerably poorer than a church mouse!

I was once in a hotel where a Russian Oligarch was with his family
They had their own staff- the children seemed to have more nannies than children
He and his wife were about the same age and seemed very happy

Also stayed at another hotel where there was a very rich Russian (not sure if oligarch) . He kept flying round in a helicopter. He had a prostitute with him who didnt seem very happy.

I’d worry about getting bumped off and chopped into bits by the minions of a rival oligarch.

As you were…

@Classica

Also, loved the contrast with her first husband who seemed considerably poorer than a church mouse!

I know! That first apartment. What a contrast.

I think I’d be quite rubbish at being super rich (just as well because the likelihood of it happening is rather remote). I don’t like ostentation, don’t fancy owning an enormous house and would never manage the heels or the nails!

Watch Alexandra Tolstoys documentary .. not all it's cracked up to be