Toddler pack lunch in cafes

[Casheeeew]

I eat a about 3 cafes near me regularly, but only once per week, occasionally twice. I have always taken my son (18months) a full packed lunch, and I buy myself lunch and a coffee.

Its never occured to me to question this until today. Is he too old to be having home brought food?

They do have a kids menu but I prefer him to have a selection of things to pick at that I know he'll like.

Aibu - or if not, how long before he's too old?

I'm not paying £4 for a cheese sandwich (all he will ever eat for lunch) when I can make one for nothing!!

I can make tea at home for nothing so is it ok for me to take a flask with me and then sit and drink it in a cafe? What if I'm with someone else who's buying coffee?

How can people think this is ok!

Yeah that’s unreasonable unless they’re having baby food, or they have specific allergies.

If they sell stuff he could feasibly eat, even if not his favourite, you can’t be bringing your own.

Just ask. Some places mind, some don't.

I've got children with allergies so often have food we've brought with us on standby, I always ask if it's ok first though.

I stopped once DD was off purees. If I didn't think she'd eat a lot I'd choose something she would like to eat some of.

I've never been asked not to give him
his own food in a cafe. And I'm almost always with other people who do the same.

Interesting that people have such different views!!

And no, of course I'd not take my own food in for me. If cafes would rather I stay at home and eat and not spend £15-20 then fine!

I used to ask for toast for DS quite often in cafes and they would usually happily do it and charge a bit. Its definitely less cheeky to ask than to take your own!

I was once pulled up by a cafe own for sharing a jacket potato with my 18 month old. It was the size of an adults foot and could have fed 3. I did point this out, politely, saying that buying 2 would have been a waste of money and food and that I was a regular, usually buying myself, toddler and xhildren food and drink.
I kinda stopped going in after that.
The whole "you are taking 2 spaces" is nonsense unless they don't let people on their own have a table! As long as you buy a drink and some food yourself I fail to see the issue.

I Do for my 2 year old due to allergies and he eats a very small selection of food within the groups he's allowed.
But I always buy him a little bowl chips. And always ask if it's OK if he can have a couple of bits out his bag

YABU, restaurants and cafes have struggled in the last two years you could at least buy a child’s cheese on toast or other small meal. It’s very CF behaviour! Sorry!

Well - it’s an issue because most cafes do have a rule about not eating your own food on the premises.

You could apply some of the above statements to anything - most of us would buy a coffee and take a packed lunch, or go with a friend and have the friend buy a drink while you have a flask of tea.

I do get there’s a grey area with babies but I do think 18 months is past that, tbh.

Those having ago at me I don't make the rules of the cafe, the owner does.

We don't even allow those with allergies to eat their own food as we cater to most allergies.

It doesn't seem to have affected business either, we're busy most days at lunchtimes.

Look come on, that's not fair. I bring a pack lunch so he can have a varied diet of things I know he will eat. It's not to save money.

This completely defies the point of eating out.

In reality, unless the cafe is very busy, they would probably rather have OP buying her meal and not her child's than have an empty table with no one buying anything.
If they act as though they like you OP, as you stated, I think they're probably fine with it. They're a business, and you're a customer not a friend, so I find it highly unlikely they'd be seething in silence at your CFery rather than just telling you 'the rules'.

It's cheeky as fuck.

Once kids are past the milk/pouches stage you absolutely can't sit in a cafe with a packed lunch, even if the parent is having something.

I'll be honest, if I'm going out for lunch or dinner with my partner or a friend I would usually feed my 2 year old first. Mainly because he's hard work for feeding and I want to relax. I will sometimes take a packet or crisps, sometimes he will share my food and other times I'll buy him some biscuits/crisps/chips. I used to always buy him a proper kids Mela but I found I'd spend £4 on a meal and he would eat one chips! He's too distracted when we are out.

I can't agree with the comparisons of an adult bringing their own flask of soup etc. He's not an adult. He's a toddler. I'm not sure alot of the kids meal are aimed at toddlers, different ages can have more salt etc And yes he could have toast but one cafe we go to every Wednesday, so I wouldn't want him to only eat toast regularly.

Basically, it's not about the money, and he's a really good eater he loves all kinds of different food, but I like to know exactly what he's eating.

He's always good as gold and no one's ever said anything.

I think I'll still bring stuff - what is a packed lunch if not multiple snacks anyway and buy him a token thing so I'm not being a CF.

I don't being him a full meal though, literally a snack. Also, there will always be too adults eating full meals and drinks.

*two adults

If it's not about the money then find a cafe which sells food suitable for your kid.

Mine is 17 months old and I have just started buying from the menu, as she won't entertain jars/pouches anymore, especially not warmed up 🤢

It is tricky though, as she tends to throw finger food on the floor so buying a 4 quid toastie would be a total waste of money.

Makes costa etc tricky so we usually go to places where they do more than just sandwiches and cakes

Given that some coffee houses have people just buying a coffee or two and staying hours to use the WIFI I personally don't think that taking a packed lunch for an18 month old is unreasonable. They aren't to know whether you have a fussy eater or not. Sometimes children don't like whats on a kids menu and your child could end up hungry if you don't take a packed lunch for them. As long as you buy something there it shouldn't be a problem.

@Casheeeew

I can't agree with the comparisons of an adult bringing their own flask of soup etc. He's not an adult. He's a toddler. I'm not sure alot of the kids meal are aimed at toddlers, different ages can have more salt etc And yes he could have toast but one cafe we go to every Wednesday, so I wouldn't want him to only eat toast regularly.

Basically, it's not about the money, and he's a really good eater he loves all kinds of different food, but I like to know exactly what he's eating.

He's always good as gold and no one's ever said anything.

I think I'll still bring stuff - what is a packed lunch if not multiple snacks anyway and buy him a token thing so I'm not being a CF.

What’s the point of this thread if you don’t take on board what people are saying?

I’ve seen people doing this and for much older children too. Honestly it’s not on, if you go to a cafe you need to buy the food there. It’s fine to bring baby food, it’s fine to share if they have a small appetite, it’s acceptable to buy them something and have some food with you just in case they don’t like it. It’s taking the Mickey to take an entire picnic from home

I personally don't see any issue with it. If they were 5 then yes, but 18m is still a baby.

You're unreasonable for "missing" sausage casserole! It's horrible.