AIBU to think that no employer would want me as my son is always off sick?

[PinchOfVom]

I haven’t worked since my 9yo was born.

First of al it was really clear he was autistic and I spent all my time trying to sort out his inability to sleep eat poo speak ..... it was relentless

He has now levelled out to the point that he could cope with being in after school club and few times a week and I’m desperate to go to work

The problem I have is: he may be vastly improved on the autism

Could you do something like agency work - I know NHS has agency HCA’s for example, many literally book a shift the day before or very short notice so you could do it when you know your son is likely to be well. It’s not for everyone though so ignore if not for you!

Don’t think public sector is for me really - I don’t want to deliberately work somewhere where nobody cares about absenteeism. I want to do an honest job without the guilt of feeling like I’m off all the time or not fully committed

I mean- you've started a thread saying I'll probably need a load of time off of work, people point out that the public sector can be more reasonable about absence than private sector (its not that no one cares, but there tends to be more support in place), and you say you don't want to work somewhere like that- someone make it make sense .

@PinchOfVom

Does anybody know of any wfh type of agencies etc?

What on earth does everybody else do????

I haven’t worked for about 15 years. My autistic son doesn’t get poorly much or ever really but having to pick him up from school/college regularly has been a challenge. I can’t see anyone wanting to employ someone who needs to go off a few times a week to pick up their child because he’s had a meltdown so I’ve never bothered. Also having to be home for the school bus at 3,15 every day as no one else can handle him. After school clubs don’t exist at his school either. It’s just not possible to work outside of the home. With carers allowance and my husband working all the hours we have managed financially.

Also you still have to actually work from home, if you're planning on working with them in the background you're much better off finding an employer that has reasonable policies re absence and flexibility etc.

You've been given some mis-information. Being autistic doesn't mean you're more likely to be sick. If your son spends a lot of his time in environments that haven't been designed with his needs in mind the extra effort he has to put in compared to others will lead to him experiencing higher stress levels, which will lead to him becoming run down and picking up more illness - just like anyone else who works in a stressful environment everyday. As an autistic adult my sickness levels reduced dramatically when I started working from home and was able to design the environment to meet my needs.

1. Are there any adaptions you can make to his school/home life that will mean he isn't run down as much? This could involve looking at how he manages his mental health e.g does he exercise regularly?

1. A flexible working from home role sounds perfect for you. There might be something suitable on www.charityjob.co.uk/

HMG107 autistic children are well known to have comorbidities meaning they are more likely to be unwell.

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8085719/