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Original poster

School commute

78 replies

TheSunIsStillShining · 06/02/2022 11:02

HI,

What do you think is a realistic expectation for a secondary school kid (16) to commute. School starts at 8.30, finishes 4.30.

Both H and me had a max 20m walk to all our schools, our friends never did more than 30m, but this was in diff country/city.

Son says max 20m. But that leaves us within a circle of very high rent area (so no point moving) and we want to move to a lower rent area, but they are about an hour or a bit more away.

At the moment we live 8m walk from his school. so that doesn't help the argument.

Some clarification:

  • we are not letting our kid govern our lives, but it has to be good for all 3 of us
  • we both wfh FT, so that is not an aspect to be considered
  • we want to find a compromise that works for us, but am interested to hear how much other ppl's kids travel
  • we offered the option for him to use my small moped, but he flat out refused. Car is out of the question.
OP posts:
Hercisback · 06/02/2022 11:04

An hour is too much.

Being closer to school means he will probably have a better social experience too as his friends will be nearby.

30m would be my absolute limit.

blondie292 · 06/02/2022 11:06

A friend of mine has a beautiful house in the middle of nowhere and her DS is 40mins each way and as there's no transport she has to pick him up and drop him off.

He doesn't get invited to playdates and kids don't come to his as its too far out of the way.

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 06/02/2022 11:08

What is public transport like?

We live near a big sixth form college (2000pupils apparently). Only about 100 a year will be within walking distance, if that. The neighbouring secondary school has 210 pupils a year, and not even half of them are within walking distance. Most come by bus.

Walking distance here being the two closest villages, one of which is a mile away.

Camomila · 06/02/2022 11:10

I used to do either an hour walk or a 40minute bus journey to school and never minded it, but other friends who did a similar journey didn't like it and wish they'd gone to a nearer school.

Is he in year 11 now? Could you stay where you are for this year and then move house in the summer and he can go to a sixth form/college nearer the new house?

PrivateHall · 06/02/2022 11:10

Can you wait until he finishes school before you move? He already has such a long day, I would agree that 20 minutes is plenty. You WFH so perhaps don't get the impact a commute has on your day.

VelvetChairGirl · 06/02/2022 11:14

I dont know my kids school is about 45mins walk away, we use the tube.

but it wasnt my first choice school anyway, it was the 3rd, didnt get my first choice or anywhere near first choice with the primary either.

and their are lots of kids at the secondary who couldn't possibly get there without the train, they would need at least 3 buses.

I know of at least one child there who isnt even in london, has to commute in from slough (bus to the train station, train to central london, then tube).

Sally872 · 06/02/2022 11:15

I wouldn't expect them to walk more than 30 mins but should be able to take bus if am option.

CagneyNYPD1 · 06/02/2022 11:15

My DS13 walks 45mins each way. Unless it is tipping down with rain then DH will drop him off. Or DS will jump on a bus part way home.

DD will start secondary in September and will be in the next town. So 6/7 miles away. About 45 mins door to door including a 10 minute train journey.

But this is pretty standard where we live. My ds has friends who travel at least an hour each way. Easily. Where we live, it is just part of what you do.

So a 8 min walk to school is a luxury. 20 mins is great. But if 30/40 mins will ease the financial burden on you, then that is absolutely fine. He is 16, more than old enough to get himself out and about. And more than old enough to learn about financial strain and the compromise that must be made.

CharbetHallmark · 06/02/2022 11:15

I took a school bus for 45 mins to an hour every morning and afternoon never did me any harm. Hopefully eldest will go to the same high school I went to come September and will have the same commute.

TheHoptimist · 06/02/2022 11:16

1 hour each way either by walking or public transport
If you are in a catchment to get in then there are often school buses

Overthebow · 06/02/2022 11:18

An hour or more is too far at that age. Unless you’re willing to take him to abd from school and to all social things then it’s not really fair. I’d go 30 min max.

HelloDulling · 06/02/2022 11:19

An hour long walk is a lot in the winter, in the rain, with a bag full of school stuff. Or do you mean by bus? Which is still quite long, but okay.

If he’s 16, is he about to do GCSEs? Can he go somewhere else for A-levels/college?

Dishwashersaurous · 06/02/2022 11:21

Totally depends on location. Rural will be long. Bus ride will be longer.

So 3/4 mile cycle ride each way is reasonable.

TheHoptimist · 06/02/2022 11:21

@Overthebow

An hour or more is too far at that age. Unless you’re willing to take him to abd from school and to all social things then it’s not really fair. I’d go 30 min max.
He is 16- not 6

Many 16 year olds travel more than an hour to college

Sockpile · 06/02/2022 11:21

DS(13) leaves the house at 7.15 and gets home just before 5. It’s a long day and I was worried about the length of the journey but he copes.

Bintymcbintface · 06/02/2022 11:23

I'd look at it from the POV of what you WANT to do that journey yourself on the way to work? Would you want to travel for an hour each way, getting up earlier and walking for an hour, being busy all day and doing the same on return? I understand sometimes it's unavoidable but I think it's mean to expect a teen to do that in all weathers if it can be avoided

CPGyellowwallpaper · 06/02/2022 11:25

I don't live within walking distance of any high schools. All local ones would be a bus or car ride away. However, 30-40 min walk would be my max. Assuming finish at 3 then even in winter they would be home before it got really dark. I am not sure I would be happy with any child walking longer in winter.

Ducksurprise · 06/02/2022 11:25

An hour on a school bus (to the nearest school) is normal from 11 where I am. Certainly a 20m cycle isn't unusual either.

bindud · 06/02/2022 11:26

I'm a Londoner & an hour door to door was very normal.

LefttoherownDevizes · 06/02/2022 11:26

DCx2 School is 3.5 miles away but journey takes an hour on bus and walk. DC3 moved to local school which is 1.5 mile walk.

He moans and said he'd rather the longer bus journey, reality is he could never get on the bus hence it taking so long.

As we are near grammars here kids regularly do 1hr+ journeys involving 2+ buses, and it's just a consequence of going to grammar.

Would cycling be an option?

RedskyThisNight · 06/02/2022 11:28

I would say 30 minutes max travelling time (by whatever method).

Any more than that is just unpleasant, particularly on top of an already long day. I wouldn't choose to do that as an adult (and the very many people now wanting to keep working at home rather than go back to hour long commutes, tells me that most adults now think the same) so why would I force it on my child? It would be different if he really wanted to go to the school and was fully behind the longer journey, or you were so rural that there was no nearer school.

Flyingbymypants · 06/02/2022 11:28

I would say a journey of up to an hour is fine. I used to walk to the bus stop approx 5 min. 20 min bus ride into town. Walk from town to school another 20 mins. This was quite normal.

jc3215 · 06/02/2022 11:29

Up to an hour on a bus I wouldn't mind but I would never allow my child to walk more than 20 minutes to school.

Starlightstarbright1 · 06/02/2022 11:29

Depends
Public transport, location.

1 hour by bus or walking?

Newgirls · 06/02/2022 11:29

That’s 10 hours a week commuting. Time he could be studying, relaxing or doing something creative? Is it really the only option?