Why didn't Mumsnet delete my post??

[Larafromthe80s]

Just curious... I started a thread which detailed a lot of information about a situation I was in, thankfully I'd name changed for it!
Anyway it blew up and got picked up by a regional media outlet
I reported the thread to Mumsnet and continued to do so over the following 72 hours, as well as emailing them directly.
By this point the article was in 3 nationals and around 6 regionals

A family member screen shot the news article from his Facebook newsfeed to me saying as a joke "this isn't you isn't" as he he hadn't actually read the article, only the headline and thought it was just coincidental. And it was me 😖
I was mortified and am living in fear that the people it was about will have seen it.
Why did Mumsnet take so long to delete it, is that normal?

@Migrainesbythedozen

Why doesn't Mumsnet employ Caveat Emptor. I think that you really need to think carefully before posting on here, and if you take the risk, and your thread is picked up by the media and is identifiable - TOO BAD. You made the choice to post. Everyone knows there is a chance their thread couple be picked up. Ffs, everyone knows that! So don't post unless you are prepared to accept that. People put time and effort into responding, and the OP, who made the choice to post, knowing the risks, then decides to whinge and get the thread deleted. It's immature. Post knowing the risks, or don't post at all. There should be absolutely no thread deletions just because the OP 'changed their mind'. I am so bloody sick of this. You take the risks, and that's that.

That's pretty much how it used to be. MN have moved away from that because, thankfully, they're human and felt compassion for those with good reason for posts to be deleted.

MN's MO is to help make parents lives easier, not fuck them up.

And no, not everyone knows the Daily Mail trawls this site for stories, what a nasty attitude.

Tbf though @runningoutofnewnames if you aren't aware that msm and other websites trawl the internet for click-baity content from other sites then maybe you shouldn't be posting such personal information if you're new to the internet

@BrambleRoses

It’s far too simplistic to say people ‘shouldn’t’ post, or only post within the exact perimeters of what certain posters deem acceptable.

I think one of the problems is that you can be pushed into giving out more information than you want - some posters can be very demanding and you also can be subjected to a certain amount of ridicule either for name changing or for refusing to give our certain pieces of information. That’s often by the same sorts of posters who are here ridiculing people for giving out personal info. Funny, that.

Well it's not about the parameters of what other posters feel is acceptable, but should be within the parameters of what you, yourself feels you'd be happy with absolutely anyone knowing- including potentially those involved.

That's true, but it's a messageboard and if you feel you cant say no that detail isn't needed or not happy to share that then perhaps it's not the place for you. Self responsibility should still be a thing. Mumsnet needs to make money to survive, to do that it needs posters, if people keep posting and threads get deleted all of the time they'll find somewhere else. Perhaps like children now have Internet safety lessons some adults would benefit too

@caringcarer

If you want something removed instantly just have a little moan about Meghan Markle and it will be taken down in a flash.

I was going to say the same thing! No criticism of her allowed here - it's the one thing guaranteed to get a thread pulled.

A lot of threads about celebrities are pulled because they're not in the spirit. Stacey Solomon and Adele being recent ones.
Why do people want to come on here to criticise Meghan Markle in particular?

@CatNameChange101

I don't know whether posting stuff here counts as identifiable for the purposes of GDPR

It doesn’t

Can you explain this further please?

If a poster puts down information they later realise is capable of being used to identify them (and GDPR is clear this can relate to any information), and Mumsnet is a processor of that information under GDPR, do they not have a right under GDPR to withdraw their consent to the processing of that information and request its removal ?

If not, why not?

@Migrainesbythedozen

Why doesn't Mumsnet employ Caveat Emptor. I think that you really need to think carefully before posting on here, and if you take the risk, and your thread is picked up by the media and is identifiable - TOO BAD. You made the choice to post. Everyone knows there is a chance their thread couple be picked up. Ffs, everyone knows that! So don't post unless you are prepared to accept that. People put time and effort into responding, and the OP, who made the choice to post, knowing the risks, then decides to whinge and get the thread deleted. It's immature. Post knowing the risks, or don't post at all. There should be absolutely no thread deletions just because the OP 'changed their mind'. I am so bloody sick of this. You take the risks, and that's that.

This just about summarises what's wrong with MN today. What sort of an attitude is this?? How about people posting for the first time, who haven't seen this miserable business of threads being picked up by lowlife newspapers? How about people posting in desperation because they need urgent advice to escape a DV situation? People who are mentally unwell or under the influence and post too much info? How about a little bit of fucking empathy?

This crap about 'people taking time and effort to respond' is utter bullshit. MN isn't your personal file storage system. If what you are posting is so profound and enlightening, perhaps keep your own record, so you have all of your heartfelt advice safely archived.

As if anyone needed reminding, MN is supposed to be a forum for parents, by parents, to offer support and guidance. I think what you're looking for is the online equivalent of a gladiator's arena.

@Migrainesbythedozen

Why doesn't Mumsnet employ Caveat Emptor. I think that you really need to think carefully before posting on here, and if you take the risk, and your thread is picked up by the media and is identifiable - TOO BAD. You made the choice to post. Everyone knows there is a chance their thread couple be picked up. Ffs, everyone knows that! So don't post unless you are prepared to accept that. People put time and effort into responding, and the OP, who made the choice to post, knowing the risks, then decides to whinge and get the thread deleted. It's immature. Post knowing the risks, or don't post at all. There should be absolutely no thread deletions just because the OP 'changed their mind'. I am so bloody sick of this. You take the risks, and that's that.

Why don’t journalists do their job and check sources before filling up their “news” media with what could be (and in some cases probably is) pure fiction.

Buyers of news media should be aware that the news seems to be somewhere between pure fiction and someone’s opinion on how they want the general population to think.

Take away the copy and paste SM content and their is very little news left

This crap about 'people taking time and effort to respond' is utter bullshit. MN isn't your personal file storage system

In many cases when the topic has been sensitive posters have poured their hearts out with their own upsetting experience which they thought might help the poster, plus others going through the same. Then the whole thing gets deleted, leaving everyone unable to see it.

@Monopolyiscrap you've never written a GDPR policy in your life and if you have I'd strongly recommend the company gets a new one written.

@Sparklingbrook

This crap about 'people taking time and effort to respond' is utter bullshit. MN isn't your personal file storage system

In many cases when the topic has been sensitive posters have poured their hearts out with their own upsetting experience which they thought might help the poster, plus others going through the same. Then the whole thing gets deleted, leaving everyone unable to see it.

And so? If it's important to them that others read their story, they can always post their own thread.

And so? If it's important to them that others read their story, they can always post their own thread

It's not 'important that others read their story' they are trying to help the OP and others by sharing it.
So you are saying if you see a thread where you have direct experience of the problem you shouldn't comment on it and try and help the OP, but start your own thread about it instead? Right.

Anyone who isn’t aware that posting on an Internet forum is putting their story out there in the public domain shouldn’t be posting on the internet.

Whether it’s the tabloids or not is irrelevant. MN is already a public platform, you lose control over who reads it the instant you post it. Even if it isn’t picked up by the tabloids.

It’s little wonder that so many children fall victim to grooming and bullying online when adults seem to be completely oblivious to how the internet actually works.

Also, people need to stop kidding themselves that mn is all about support. MN may be by parents for parents but mn is predominantly a chat forum which happens to contain some postings where people receive support.

There’s a reason why AIBU is the top visited board here and a reason why mn promote this fact. They want to encourage chat, lively discussion, disagreement, debate, and sometimes that means that people will post their personal stories and may or may not receive support, although the former is definitely not a given.

MN want this to be a chat forum not a support forum. Anyone who thinks otherwise is kidding themselves.

[quote girlmom21]@Monopolyiscrap you've never written a GDPR policy in your life and if you have I'd strongly recommend the company gets a new one written. [/quote]
I don't know why this poster is coming in for all these personal attacks when nobody has put forward a credible rebuff of what they are saying..

Can you explain...

If a poster puts down information they later realise is capable of being used to identify them (and GDPR is clear this can relate to any information), and Mumsnet is a processor of that information under GDPR, do they not have a right under GDPR to withdraw their consent to the processing of that information and request its removal ?

If not, why not?

If a poster puts down information they later realise is capable of being used to identify them (and GDPR is clear this can relate to any information), and Mumsnet is a processor of that information under GDPR, do they not have a right under GDPR to withdraw their consent to the processing of that information and request its removal ?

No...

Of your registration data, only your Mumsnet or Gransnet username is displayed on screen for other users to see – but posts on Mumsnet or Gransnet Talk are visible to anyone on the internet. So when posting, you should bear in mind that any personally identifying details you include in the text or pictures you post could be seen by anyone.

We also provide an anonymised copy of all Talk posts to a handful of carefully chosen organisations so that they can analyse social trends. None of your personal information is ever shared and we remove usernames before sharing this information.

Registered members of Mumsnet or Gransnet can start discussions and add comments, pictures and videos to existing discussions within Mumsnet or Gransnet Talk’s forums under ourTerms of Use. This is optional in the sense that it’s up to you whether you post on a Mumsnet product or not; if you do post we always store the contents of those posts. These posts are public, but of your registration data, only your username is displayed on-screen. Your username is picked by you when youjoin a Mumsnet product; on Mumsnet you can change it at any time inMy Account.

Mumsnet or Gransnet forums (with the exception of some topics, like'Off the beaten track') are visible to search engines. This means that any personal information users choose to share in their posts on a Mumsnet product can be seen widely. We cannot control who sees these posts.

In all your posts across Mumsnet, in personal messages to other users, and in choosing your username, you should be mindful about the possibility that information you choose to disclose could lead to someone working out who you are in ‘real life’. For example, anything that references your real life name, your children’s real names, where you live or your date of birth could make it easy for someone to work out who you are.

Mumsnet and Gransnet are sites for grown-ups and we believe that our users are adults who can decide for themselves what information they choose to share on Mumsnet and Gransnet Talk. That said, if you’re ever worried that you’ve said too much, hit ‘report’ on one of your posts and explain the problem to our moderation team; they will be happy to help if they can.

You should be aware that the moderation team and a small number of other members of staff at Mumsnet and Gransnet have access to your Talk posts and can see that content in combination with your registration data. We restrict the number of staff who have access to this data to the minimum and we constantly review this. You can check your registration data inMy Account.

We provide a copy of all Talk posts to a small number of organisations for analysis or to create software analysis tools to analyse brands and sentiment towards topics. Your personal data and username are not included in the copies of posts that we provide to these organisations

@Sparklingbrook

And so? If it's important to them that others read their story, they can always post their own thread

It's not 'important that others read their story' they are trying to help the OP and others by sharing it.
So you are saying if you see a thread where you have direct experience of the problem you shouldn't comment on it and try and help the OP, but start your own thread about it instead? Right.

Erm...no. I'm saying if they get upset that it's going to be deleted if the whole thread gets deleted, THEN they can start their own thread about their experiences if they so desire.

@suggestionsplease1 Mumsnet aren't sharing any personal data. They're an anonymous forum.

Why don’t journalists do their job and check sources before filling up their “news” media with what could be (and in some cases probably is) pure fiction.

Have you read these articles. They are not saying that 'mum definitely did this thing at this time' they are more like 'mum posts on Mumsnet stating that every hates that they called their baby doochbag'. It is factual in that it is true that someone said that on Mumsnet even if the situation isn't true.

It's not about good journalism- they pick the ones that'll make good clickbait titles and will initiate discussion (which is why there's always loads of baby names ones).

People need to take responsibility for what they post online. If you think it'd be identifying if it's picked up by the daily mail it's identifying on here too.

I once posted a picture of my lunch out, instead of my Docs (boots), I asked for the pic to be deleted and it was within minutes, and they sent me a lovely email reply. I think it probably depends on who is moderating and how many are on duty at any time. Obvious things like Megan posts will be picked up by filters and moderated quickly.

Why doesn't Mumsnet employ Caveat Emptor. I think that you really need to think carefully before posting on here

Part of the problem is some posters don't realise it's possible to trawl through their post history and other posters do this gleefully. So whilst the OP might think they haven't given too much away, someone else will link other info which makes it identifying. This sometimes happens even if you name change.

Erm...no. I'm saying if they get upset that it's going to be deleted if the whole thread gets deleted, THEN they can start their own thread about their experiences if they so desire

Erm well they could I suppose but if they were specifically posting to help someone it’s unlikely. 🤷‍♀️

[quote girlmom21]@suggestionsplease1 Mumsnet aren't sharing any personal data. They're an anonymous forum.[/quote]
They are processors of information under GDPR, are they not?

The terms and conditions referred to do not conflict with my statement, which was about the right of an individual, under GDPR, to withdraw their consent to the processing of personal information and request its removal.

Those T&C's are a reasonable warning to people but they don't negate a processor of information's obligations under GDPR to comply with a request to stop processing it and remove it (as long as it has come to their attention and within a reasonable timeframe, I imagine).

Apparently it doesn't matter about the T&Cs because nobody ever reads them when they join.

[quote girlmom21]@suggestionsplease1 Mumsnet aren't sharing any personal data. They're an anonymous forum.[/quote]
Legally, Mumsnet are considered a publisher of the words we write here., in the same way a news site is responsible for what its journalists write and it publishes.

It doesn't matter that they're not moderating each of our comments. They host the website and publish our words. Whether they choose to check them or not is their choice. It doesn't change the fact that they're - legally - the publisher.

If someone posts personal information in a post, then Mumsnet have. effectively, published that data and are responsible for it.

This is the case for libel law. (If we say something dodgy, MN are responsible for it as well as us).

I don't know how it works wrt GDPR law, but taking an apparent common sense approach of "well they're not responsible for what we write" may not be applicable when you're getting into legal responsibility.

@Sparklingbrook

This crap about 'people taking time and effort to respond' is utter bullshit. MN isn't your personal file storage system

In many cases when the topic has been sensitive posters have poured their hearts out with their own upsetting experience which they thought might help the poster, plus others going through the same. Then the whole thing gets deleted, leaving everyone unable to see it.

That was my thread. Mine turned from asking an AIBU about an incident to one where posters were being really supportive and some were pouring their hearts out. But once the DM picked it up, I had to ask for it to be deleted because I didn’t want anyone I knew in real life to know my personal past. I felt terrible, as some posters were amazing, and I didn’t even have a chance to thank them before bringing it down as in the short time it was up in the DM, I had been identified by two people in real life who then came here and learnt things about me I wish they didn’t.

I still wish I could remember those posters names to thank them for their support.