To think it’s disingenuous to say breastfeeding is free?

[Jerrui]

When pregnant encountered lots and lots of breastfeeding promotion- often it’s cited it being free as a benefit.

I have personally found as soon as you actually have a baby and are feeding it there is absolutely zero support. In my area there is no infant feeding team etc just community midwife who told me to substitute BF with FF at two weeks old when baby failed to regain birth weight.

I have spent hundreds of pounds on lactation consultant, double electric pump, milk storage, trying to keep breastfeeding going.

I have added formula top up and was shocked how cheap it is. We got bottles for free in those Emma’s diary type packs, and Aldi formula costs £2 a week.

I think trying to promote breastfeeding as a more economic option to pregnant women is stupid.
I feel actually public funds would be much better spend on training and recruiting to provide actual support to mothers trying to breastfeed, rather than health promotion with misleading, simplistic and dumbed down messages.
I feel it’s no wonder breastfeeding is mainly the preserve of the middle classes when you have to invest so much money to get any help!

Actually the whole "women's time is worth nothing" quote is based on the situation in America where many breastfeeding mothers are spending hours every day expressing milk because they do not have maternity leave allowing them to be with their babies.

Maybe the time factor is not such a thing in the UK (and therefore the saying isn't particularly helpful) but it's a real awful pressure on some mums in the US.

The OP's point seems to be that support should be better funded for everyone which I can't see why anyone would disagree with, not sure why the responses are so outraged! I didn't spend a lot of money on bf myself but it's ridiculous the way you either have to rely on the free support from charities or pay £££ to get decent experienced support in a lot of the UK.

This was your experience but I don’t think it’s the norm. I’ve BF 5 DC and never used a ‘lactation consultant’… The only thing I ever bought was an electric pump and some bottles for the odd time I went out. Pretty cheap compared to buying 1-2 boxes of formula a week which is crazily priced.

I don’t begrudge giving my children SOME of my time, just not ALL of time. Which as previous posters have posted out, breastfeeding can in some cases can amount to the vast majority of your time. I did not cease to exist when I became a parent I have needs as well

I'm sorry you had a hard time, but apart from buying a breast pump set, it really was free for me, and for countless woman throughout the history of the human race. I have no idea what has gone wrong that it is so difficult for some people in modern times (you are definitely not alone OP), would be interesting to read any studies that have been done on this - anyone know of any?

It's just another stick to beat women with when they can't or don't want to breastfeed. "Why dont you just breastfeed, its free and it's easier! Just roll over and stick your boob in their mouth! Why would you want to make life more difficult for yourself!" Yeah alright. Like it's that easy for all of us.

Completely agree that the money spent on posters would be better spent on real life support.

I lived in Birmingham when DD was born and struggled. Thankfully a health visitor recommended the ONE NHS breastfeeding support group in the entire city that was any good. Two brilliant breastfeeding specialists helped me through. But there were hundreds of women unable to access their support. It would have been amazing for those two women to have had the funding and time to share their knowledge with other HCPs.

Definitely not ‘free’ lanolin is expensive! But so worth it.

Sounds like you’ve had a hard time establishing bf. My first was difficult and I couldn’t afford any support when the rest of my NCT group were getting private tongue tie appointments, lactation consultants and cranial osteopathy. I stopped much earlier than I would have liked due to lack of support. It’s tough and if it’s going badly it can be costly. I bought three pumps to try to increase supply as I thought maybe the ones I had weren’t working and lactation pills. The cost of that alone would have kept my baby in formula for three months.
If it’s any consolation babies two and three fed perfectly from birth. Sometimes the babies just aren’t very good at feeding.

I'd agree to an extent with my first I spent loads. Breast pump, milk storage bags, bottles so I could express, store and get a break. Nursing tea to encourage supply.

Subsequent children were much easier and I didn't bother with the paraphenalia as such a faff it didn't save me time. Definitely cheaper overall for me to have breastfed. There are lots of health benefits too though which were more important to me than cost.

If you trying to bf, having to pump and having to give formula as well then it literally does take up all of your time. I was getting about 2 hours sleep a night as he was still feeding around 3 hourly round the clock due to being born early.

@ConstanceL

I'm sorry you had a hard time, but apart from buying a breast pump set, it really was free for me, and for countless woman throughout the history of the human race. I have no idea what has gone wrong that it is so difficult for some people in modern times (you are definitely not alone OP), would be interesting to read any studies that have been done on this - anyone know of any?

I'd also be very interested in this!

I did read an article once, I'll see if I can find it, which didn't have anything to say about whether problems are more common now, but it talked about what women who did have problems have done throughout history.

Obviously a lot of these babies would unfortunately die (this was strangely a huge source of postpartum depression for me, the idea that "in nature" I wouldn't have been able to keep my baby alive ). I do remember the article mentioning that they'd found evidence of infant feeding devices from the ancient Egyptian era!

If you are expressing it is definitely more expensive. I exclusively expressed for 13 months and it definitely cost more than formula. I had two pumps, a double pump and a hands free one for when I was out. The pump parts need replacing every month or so to ensure they are working at their best to maximise output. Getting the correct fitting flanges, all the bottles and storage bags/pots. It’s so much!

The worse thing with breastfeeding I think, is that not being able to breast feed (when you really want to) can ruin your first few weeks with the baby while everyone is stressing about it. Instead of enjoying your baby, you are trying to get help, baby is losing weight and nobody is happy

"I have no idea what has gone wrong that it is so difficult for some people in modern times."

Babies failed to thrive and died.

I had very good support with BF through the NHS with free pumps, books, lactation consultants etc. Ultimately none of this worked and I was left expressing more blood than milk with a starving baby not gaining weight. There was no option but to FF but absolutely no financial or practical support to do so. It cost an absolute furtune with no option to use vouchers, and no access to offers or promotions at the supermarket due to some law prohibiting it and failing to recognise that FF is not always a choice and is essential for survival for many babies.

I agree 100%, how do they think the milk is made? Plus nursing bras, nursing clothes, pads, pumps, support (and maybe bottles), nipple shields, lanisoh, pillows…ok you don’t need all that but it’s a lot harder without - why couldn’t those items be provided free?

Breastfeeding was actually free for me. I never bought bottles or formula or paid for a lactation consultant.

I think the time thing is ridiculous tbh. Having a baby uses up a lot of time! The time when bf is most intensive is in the very earliest weeks when all mothers, however they feed, will be spending pretty much all their time with their babies. By the time it gets to the point where you want to get out and do stuff, maybe go back to work or just see some friends, feeds are very quick and easy and/or the baby can wait longer between feeds and/or the baby can drink from a cup.

However, of course breastfeeding support should be so much better in this country. It is woeful.

@Eminybob

I also think the constant insistence that breastfeeding is sooo easy is harmful too

I agree there needs to be a balance, but there are an overwhelmingly high number of people who don’t even try for themselves because of the insistence that it is hard.

At least if people think it’s easy they will be more willing to try for themselves (and for many many people it is easy)

Just going through the thread and totally disagree with this! Very misinformed of you

The overwhelming majority of women start breastfeeding.
The overwhelming majority then give up.
Is that because it’s easy for many many people?

We dont need basic patronising health promotion going ‘ look how great BF is it’s free and easy and has these benefits!’ to guilt women, we need informed support for women to help maintain BF.

I was saying this to DH last night. For some women, it’s free, breastfeeding works beautifully for them. For other women it really isn’t.

I really hate the universal insistence that breastfeeding is free, easy, convenient and a great bonding experience. Then when you don’t have that experience, it’s pointed out that you’re a minority. 8 women in my NCT class all had the expectation of breastfeeding, 1 is EBF with a bottle refuser, 1 has had to express to build supply and top up with formula but is now back to breastfeeding mainly but can combi feed, 1 is still expressing and formula feeding, couldn’t get the latch right for breastfeeding. 4 tried, needed pumps to increase supply or because baby was in hospital and decided to switch to full formula at some point because they were knackered trying to do both. One had a traumatic birth and decided to formula feed and focus on her recovery. From that anecdotal point it’s not the case that all women find it easy, convenient and free.

Even throwing the money that I did at breastfeeding, if it establishes there comes a point when it’s cheaper to breast feed long term. However, how much time and money are you meant to keep throwing at something before you realise it isn’t working? My baby is 10 weeks and I breastfeed until they were 5 weeks. The cost of bottles, perfect prep, several tins of formula, bottles, teats and an on the go flask has worked out less than the cost of breastfeeding at the moment (breastfeeding: £250 on pump, £30 on Elvie catch to capture letdown, Hakka £12, breast pads £5, nipple cream and pads to relive pain/encourage let down £20, lactation tea £5 = £322, formula feeding: 9x Tins of formula including 1 anti reflux formula approx £100, perfect prep £110, £20 teats, £60 bottles, £30 rapid cool flask = £320). I have also been formula feeding for 9 weeks and breastfeed for 5, so per week breastfeeding is hugely more expensive, formula feeding has an ongoing cost of 5 (to probably 10 as they get older) tins of formula a month and teats every few months but per week is still going to be cheaper than breastfeeding. I’m not counting the steriliser in formula feeding as I needed to use the steriliser for breastfeeding (sterilising the expressed milk bottles and pump) and we bought a steriliser that will also do toys, thermometers etc. I still needed support from a lactation consultant and didn’t get one because they weren’t doing home visits. There was a free support session locally but I still had to pay to get there and I was on a 3 hour feeding schedule but expressing after every feed and each feeding cycle was about 2 hours (feed expressed breast milk, try to breast feed, top up with formula, settle baby, express) so I didn’t have the time to go out and try to establish breastfeeding. Baby lost too much of their birthweight while I was trying to breastfeed and was borderline jaundice, so we got readmitted to hospital. I’ve not included the additional days in hospital in the cost of breastfeeding but it was significant.

By the way, I went into breastfeeding knowing some women found it hard. I’d done extensive reading. Still I was told it was free and it was best for the baby. It was a stick I was beating myself with while struggling, contemplating stopping and even now due to the guilt I feel. Added to the guilt that I’m formula feeding is the fact that I spent so much money and have nothing to show for it.

Couldn’t agree more!

For everyone commenting on the women's time quote, saying it's disgusting, bf is worth more than money, everything can't be counted, etc - yes, that's true but you can't have it both ways. You can't say "bf is the best because it's free!" and if challenged on that say "well what does the cost matter anyway! This isn't about money!".

If the cost doesn't matter, within reason, (which I agree with) then why bring money in to it at all?

Also, in response to the question about what happened in the olden days…if everyone breastfed, and you were surrounded by family then your sister/sister in law/cousin/mum would have fed the baby, until you could, or they would have been given a kind of homemade formula (and modern formula is better than the latter).

Yes women in the olden days didn't have lactation consultants but they frequently had wet nurses - paid if rich or family if poor.

@Spikeyball

"I have no idea what has gone wrong that it is so difficult for some people in modern times."

Babies failed to thrive and died.

Yes I suppose you are right sadly. I guess that's why wet nurses were needed. Just amongst my friendship group though, there seems to be more woman who have had problems with breastfeeding than haven't, is this disproportionate or part of a wider trend of the decline of breastfeeding for whatever reason? It just seems to be down to luck to me whether your baby takes easily to breastfeeding or not.

I've breastfed 3 children (still feeding a 10 month old). First baby I fed for 14 months, second 2.5 years, third 10 months in and going strong. First baby I had a rocky start (tongue tie and struggled to gain weight) I did 1 formula top up a day for a few months before dropping it again. My total outlay in over 4.5 years is - a pump for £100, nursing bras 2 for £15 x 6 or so, breast pads £4 a box but last a couple of months, feeding pillow £20, nip cream £9 x2, can't think of anything else? Formula is about £12 a tub, that lasts about a week/week and a half (£420-620 a year), then you need bottles, steriliser, one of those machines everyone seems to have (£150 total for equiptment maybe more?). I reckon I've spent about £450 total breastfeeding for 4.5 years vs just 3 years formula £1700+.

Breastfeeding is cheaper. Paying for expensive consultants etc is very middle class and not necessary, there are free groups out there to help, plus online resources. If breastfeeding works it's amazing and cheap, if it doesn't it isn't the end of the world. You don't have a baby to save money anyway...!!

I agree, breast feeding is actually never free. Maybe cheaper than formula, but not free. The extra food you have to eat to make enough milk (and not starve) costs money.