To think it’s disingenuous to say breastfeeding is free?

[Jerrui]

When pregnant encountered lots and lots of breastfeeding promotion- often it’s cited it being free as a benefit.

I have personally found as soon as you actually have a baby and are feeding it there is absolutely zero support. In my area there is no infant feeding team etc just community midwife who told me to substitute BF with FF at two weeks old when baby failed to regain birth weight.

I have spent hundreds of pounds on lactation consultant, double electric pump, milk storage, trying to keep breastfeeding going.

I have added formula top up and was shocked how cheap it is. We got bottles for free in those Emma’s diary type packs, and Aldi formula costs £2 a week.

I think trying to promote breastfeeding as a more economic option to pregnant women is stupid.
I feel actually public funds would be much better spend on training and recruiting to provide actual support to mothers trying to breastfeed, rather than health promotion with misleading, simplistic and dumbed down messages.
I feel it’s no wonder breastfeeding is mainly the preserve of the middle classes when you have to invest so much money to get any help!

I don't know anyone who had to 'invest' in so much paraphernalia or hire consultants.

Just because you spent £££ doesn't mean everyone else does.

I’ve also heard: breastfeeding is only free if a woman’s time is worth nothing.
I can think of a gazillion things I would put off doing in favour of breastfeeding.

Eating an extra 500 calories per day is obviously not free either.
PMSL. Utterly ridiculous.

I’ve also heard: breastfeeding is only free if a woman’s time is worth nothing.
That’s a pretty depressing view of your child
It has nothing to do with how anyone views any children. It simply points out, as with so much that women do, that people frequently ignore the labour involved.

No, it's equating price with value, and suggesting that because the time you spend breastfeeding your child is not something that can be monetised it is worthless and self respecting women shouldn't consider it.

I didn't need to pump with either of mine, so for me it was cheap. I did invest in some nursing T-shirts from Amazon and four nursing bras with clips to make it easier to feed, they were essential, in my opinion. And I bought a pretty scarf for cover up when nursing around PIL or out and about. I think i was very lucky tbh and I agree with pp that there is a lot of luck involved.

I ebf both of mine. Last one 30 years ago.
I probably had better support then than is available now.
Pumping wasn't something i or my friends even thought about.
Had no idea there were lactation consultants.
We either managed to bf successfully if we wanted to or if we didn't or couldn't we ff.
I feel sorry for mum's put under such pressure to bf.
As for a woman's time feeding their dc, what else would you be doing anyway with a small baby?

Breastfeeding is free of it works really well and you are able to always breastfeed on demand whenever your baby needs milk.

I certainly did not fall into that category, as is the case for many women. I ended up spending a lot of money on breastfeeding because I was desperate to make it work even though my baby couldn't latch onto me for the first couple of months. That meant forking out for the whole pump set up. It was very costly.

I am lucky that I was able to afford it all plus take so long off work in order to be available for all the feeds, but I am sure that many women are not in a position to be able to cover all of those costs whilst not working.

I agree that this is all part of the reason why it's something that middle class women tend to do.

Bear in mind a lot of the purchases to support BF - including expert knowledge you brought in - can be reused for subsequent children.

For me, breastfeeding was free. I didn't have to buy anything, although someone did buy me a pump. I used it a few times but that was it. We weren't on a high income at all, money was tight. I fed for 2 years before stopping. It all depends on how easy breastfeeding comes for a woman, as to how free it is. However, it's usually cheaper than formula feeding. The time part I don't get, I would have fed my child anyway and I enjoyed spending the time bonding with him like that. It was only 'our' thing.

I think generally the advertising for breast feeding is full of half truths and the pressure from NHS staff can actually make things worse.

I am in the same boat as you. Have spent hundreds trying to get my breasts to produce more milk after my little one arrived at 34 weeks and just didn't have the size or energy to stimulate my supply. I'd been pumping from day 3 but literally got a few drops a day. I was waking every three hours, spending about 20 minutes trying to breast her, then 20-30 mins sorting forumula, feeding and burping and then pumping for 40 minutes round the block and at ten days she was losing weight fast. The doctor at A&E told me I should be breast feeding her for 45 minutes minimum and pumping the other breasr at the same time. I was like wtf how??? Even the midwife was appalled.

I was also told bf would help get rid of the jaundice by the hospital. Apparently it's the total opposite.

I've also looked into the research on many of the claims of benefits Inc higher iq, lower etc and many of them are from flawed studies not taking into account that those who bf are more likely to be from higher socio economic status. Once adjusted for that there was no difference.

The immunity thing is also exaggerated a lot and basixally it reduces stomach bugs and eczema but thats it really.

It being “free” isn’t the only benefit though is it?
You make it sound like that’s it’s solely marketed on that basis.
I’m not going to list all the other benefits as I’m sure you know them.

It just saddens me that people may read about your experience (which is valid of course) and make a decision based on that to not even try.

I just hope all the positive stories on this thread are enough to counter balance it.

Breastfeeding for me was a wonderful experience with both my DC but I find people don’t want to hear that, only the doom and gloom.

I've had loads of issues establishing it but have had good free support and made daily calls to free NCT and national breastfeeding helplines and saw the NHS lactation specialist for free. I bought a second hand pump and second hand milk storage pots from JoJo. I'm sorry you've had a hard time but buying those bits for next to nothing means its been much cheaper for me than formula and bottles and over the course of the two years of breastfeeding recommended by the WHO will save me several hundreds....the health benefits will save me money too I guess if I don't have to pay for the impact of some of the potential consequences of not breastfeeding.

I'm a massive breastfeeding advocate and so glad it worked out for me, but I have spent thousands on it.

I had a particularly complicated story to be fair and had to pump 8 times a day alongside BFing for months, and going back to work early (a choice) meant more pumping etc

But costs for me included antenatal classes, nursing bras, nursing tops and dresses, private tongue tie procedure, private lactation consultant, cranial osteopathy sessions, rental of a hospital grade pump, buying of a double electric pump, bought a spare hand pump, bought double wearable pump for pumping at work, lots of replacement pump parts, mini fridge, pumping bras, bottles, steriliser, cooler/ chiller for storing EBM when away from home.. honestly there are probably other things I've forgotten here.

It's all worked out well for me and has been worth it. But I'm lucky I had the money to combat the problems we had!

In general I hate the dumbed down messages so agree with you on that. However the message is true for lots of women. I’m sorry you had a hard time. I did waste money on pumps etc but that was my fault as I didn’t know what I’d need and just bought one but I bought other things that I ended up not needing too. I think that’s common for FTM as you want to be as prepared as you can be and don’t know what to expect. Breastfeeding though has saved me money so I do agree with the general message.

I also think the constant insistence that breastfeeding is sooo easy is harmful too. When I was pregnant, every time it was mentioned by a midwife they just kept telling me how easy breastfeeding is, and how much easier it is than formula feeding. "Okay, great, then I will breastfeed!" I thought, and went happily through my pregnancy not giving it a second thought.

If someone would have been honest with me and told me that actually a lot of women don't find it easy at all, then I'd probably have done some research and got info from high quality sources before giving birth. I really do believe that this would have made all the difference in my breastfeeding "journey".

I don't think it's doom and gloom or off-putting to say that. I'm saying it truly with the hope that a pregnant woman who hopes to breastfeed will be inspired to do some research that will help her when her baby is here.

Clearly current approach of the constant "breast is best and free and easy" messaging with no useful info or knowledgable support from midwives isn't working, as evidenced by the rates of breastfeeding at day 1 compared to six weeks later

You are understandably angry that you aren't getting help with breastfeeding OP. That doesn't mean breastfeeding is wrong or bad in some way, it just hasn't worked for you. Contact La Leche League if you want more support, or switch to formula if that seems like the right choice for you.

I bought a pump and paraphernalia so that I could work while DH had DS. Hated pumping and happy to switch him to proper milk when he turned one, but he spat out formula in disgust the few times we tried. Years of happy breastfeeding though, it's a lovely experience when it works.

For balance, it was free for me and many other breastfeeding mums I know. Nipple cream was it.

05:41solbunny

I also think the constant insistence that breastfeeding is sooo easy is harmful too.

Agree. Bf is a learned skill and takes a certain amount of dedication. It is disheartening for women who think bf should be natural and simple to find that initially it can be frustrating and exhausting trying to feed a fractious, hungry baby.

Still worth it imo though once it's established.

You can say that in your particular instance you spent money. However, for a lot of women it is free.

[quote NumberTheory]@Mrbob
EmiliaAirheart

I’ve also heard: breastfeeding is only free if a woman’s time is worth nothing.

That’s a pretty depressing view of your child

It has nothing to do with how anyone views any children. It simply points out, as with so much that women do, that people frequently ignore the labour involved.[/quote]
It all depends on how you look at it. The time I spent feeding my children was very special for me. I did not consider it to be Labour, more a privilege.

I got free support from a National Childbirth Trust breastfeeding counsellor.

It’s like everything else though - it varies from person to person 🤷🏻‍♀️ I have friends who have successfully breastfed their children until they were 2 which no help or anything needed 🤷🏻‍♀️ And other friends who needed lots of help. Myself, I ended up spending quite a lot - nursing pads, bras, haaka, manual pump, double electric medela, storage bags,MultiMam compresses, lanolin cream, nipple shields. I gave birth in 2020 during the height of the covid restrictions and unfortunately even in hospital after giving birth there was no BF support. There was none in my community or nearby that I was able to access and what I could access online wasn’t helping our issues. We had a successful first month then all our issues started. We battled through and made it to 4 months before switching to FF.

FF for us was expensive. DS was (and still is) 98th centile for height and weight and loves his food so he was on quite big bottles already by 4 months! He also needed an anti-reflux formula at £15ish per tub. Then it took us a while to figure out what bottles and teats worked best for him so there was the cost of all that trial and error too (plus all the waste!)

Personally for me, that first month of successful breastfeeding (despite being exhausting!) was priceless! The convenience of being able to just pick up my baby and feed was amazing! I hated bottle feeding 🙈 I do think there should be more breastfeeding support available and it should be uniform across all health boards!

Mine went well (and I was very lucky) but it still cost me the pump, containers, a few dresses of which the neckline got buggered and also a spike in food bills, as BF made me ravenous.

It still is cheaper than FF, which I guess is their point.

I really liked it when DD got older and I stopped being sucked into debates about BF v FF. If the baby is fed and loved, who the fuck cares.

The food cost can be very real. I was eating a huge amount while bf with weight still dropping off me, the extra food must have cost at least as much as formula. Also took breastfeeding vitamins, which are inexplicably expensive compared to other vitamins. The time cost is enormous, but I suppose weighs against what I might have spent on babysitters, gyms, hobbies, socialising etc if anyone else could have fed her so I could have gone out without her.

BF cost me hardly anything. I bought a cheap manual pump in a microwave steriliser box for under £10 from the Tommee Tippee factory shop. I wasn't really a leaker, probably only bought 2 or 3 boxes of breast pads. I did buy some useless plastic gadgets to put in your bra from boots, a few bras in the sale over 2 children and one tube of lanolin. I expressed with my first so had some bags and boxes and ice cube trays to freeze the milk in. No notable increase in appetite, I did drink more water. Total cost well under £50 for 4 years of cumulative BF. I didn't need any additional paid support and just fed in my normal clothes with a bump band underneath to hide the jelly belly and stay warm.

I also had winter babies, so had the benefit of staying warm in bed during night feeds. For the poster who thinks we should put a value on womens time I think the bonding and convenience was priceless. I could feed my babies anywhere doing almost anything! One of my main motivations to BF was to save money, it worked for us.

I also think the constant insistence that breastfeeding is sooo easy is harmful too

I agree there needs to be a balance, but there are an overwhelmingly high number of people who don’t even try for themselves because of the insistence that it is hard.

At least if people think it’s easy they will be more willing to try for themselves (and for many many people it is easy)

Oh and nursing bras and vests, also expensive compared to non nursing versions, tried to get by with the minimum, must have spent £200-£300 easily as size kept changing.

What kind of support do you need, OP?! How old is your baby? Were they early? Could they have a tongue tie? Have you tried a nipple shield? I wouldn't spend any money on advice, personally.

I breastfed mine till 2.5 and didn't spend a penny. To the poster who said it's only free if the mother's time is worth nothing - lol! You can bf on the go with baby in a sling. I was freer breastfeeding and not worrying about sterilising bottles and taking right amounts of formula when out than all the FF mums I knew.

I've also looked into the research on many of the claims of benefits Inc higher iq, lower etc and many .

The immunity thing is also exaggerated a lot and basixally it reduces stomach bugs and eczema but thats it really

Sorry I have worked in peadiatrics for 20 years. Soley breast fed babies are much less frequently seen in A&E or admitted for ear infections, D&V and bronchiolitis .Breast milk also treats conjunctivitis very effectively and can be used directly on infantile eczema with frankly miraculous results.

I agree it is not always easy especially in the beginning, but the immune boosting benefits are incredible.