Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Comments about toddlers in double beds

200 replies

User135792468 · 21/01/2022 20:40

I have a 4 and 2.5 year old and the 4 year old has had a double bed bed since he came out of the cot bed so I could use it for ds2. A few weeks back, we decided that it was time to get ds2 his first proper bed and also went for a double.

The amount of comments I’ve had about how a toddler doesn’t need a double bed and a bit of an eye roll that I got them one is starting to irritate me. I don’t understand why people care? We like the doubles as we lay in bed and read books before bed and the dc like having sleepovers with each other. It seems as though people think it’s an odd way to one-up someone though.

To clarify, I wasn’t discussing it, just had friends over for a play date who then saw it and mentioned it in a bigger group of friends when we were out and it became a topic of conversation. There’s plenty of space for wardrobes and floor space to play so I don’t get the issue.

Is it that odd to have a double bed for young dc who are either pre school or primary age? What does everyone else have out of curiosity?

Yabu - yes, toddlers really don’t need a double bed

Yanbu - people need to mind their own business

OP posts:
Cheeserton · 22/01/2022 13:43

I honestly never realised the existence of the 'toddlers have to have a specific kind of bed' Police. It's just ridiculous, and you're right about not being able to fathom why on earth anyone should care that much.

DyingForACuppa · 22/01/2022 13:53

People have mentioned jealousy, so I'll fess up - I'm incredibly jealous of all the people on this thread who have enough space for double beds for children! I wouldn't say anything to someone who had space though. Baring a lottery win, our kids will be in singles til they leave home.

I do think views in this have changed over time, when I was young single adults were only considered to need a single bed, but I know if I were single I'd still want a double just for me!

HardbackWriter · 22/01/2022 14:03

@User387598621

Sometimes a double can fit the room better, we have a single bed in the spare room and it looks a bit lost up the corner and small children don't really play in their room much until they get older
But people have said that their justification for having a double is that then they'll never need to buy a new bed, so surely you need to think about when they will want to play in their room?
User387598621 · 22/01/2022 14:18

Never need to buy a new bed, surely they won't be still in the same grubby, toddler bed when they are a bit older, you are supposed to change beds every 8-10 years

user1496146479 · 22/01/2022 14:19

My DS1 has a double, DS1 superking & DD1 has a king! GrinGrin

TurquoiseDress · 22/01/2022 14:21

YANBU!

DC1 was straight into double bed when they were 2 yrs old, because the spare room had a double

Now 7 and still in their own double, think they would not be happy in a smaller bed!

But we all love the double, easier if DC are unwell and need to spend night with them

Really it's nobody else's business!

HintofVintagePink · 22/01/2022 14:21

Both of mine have doubles. Works a treat for us when we have to go to them in the night and can crash out next to them. Also useful when we have guests overnight.

HardbackWriter · 22/01/2022 14:21

You need to change mattresses but not necessarily the frame - until recently I slept on a cast iron bed frame from 1904... (Swapped it out for a king recently, in a triumph of pragmatism over aesthetic). I can't imagine many people will swap their children who are used to sleeping in a double into a single as they get older, anyway.

User387598621 · 22/01/2022 14:30

A double bed should easily fit in an average size bedroom with plenty of room to play so I don't really see the space issue but the mattress would need changing if not the whole bed, depends on the bed type

PattyPan · 22/01/2022 14:36

@User387598621

A double bed should easily fit in an average size bedroom with plenty of room to play so I don't really see the space issue but the mattress would need changing if not the whole bed, depends on the bed type
I think you are vastly overestimating the size of an average (non master) bedroom.
Snowiscold · 22/01/2022 14:45

@User387598621

A double bed should easily fit in an average size bedroom with plenty of room to play so I don't really see the space issue but the mattress would need changing if not the whole bed, depends on the bed type
Most children share rooms where I live. They are often in single rooms in bunks. Definitely not room for a double bed for one child.
MajesticElephant · 22/01/2022 15:19

I must admit I find the idea strange because growing up I always had a single bed, all my friends had single beds, at uni I had a single bed and now all my DCs friends have single beds. When I bought my first flat I took my single bed from home with me, it wasn’t until I got married we bought a bigger bed. I guess it feels unnecessary and a sign of the time of everything getting bigger/more extravagant (except the size of new builds!) but who am I to judge!

00100001 · 22/01/2022 15:20

@User387598621

A double bed should easily fit in an average size bedroom with plenty of room to play so I don't really see the space issue but the mattress would need changing if not the whole bed, depends on the bed type
Err...no
TheLazyBeagle · 22/01/2022 15:31

@User387598621

A double bed should easily fit in an average size bedroom with plenty of room to play so I don't really see the space issue but the mattress would need changing if not the whole bed, depends on the bed type
We live in a fairly large 4 bed house with 3 reception rooms. A double bed would only fit comfortably in the master bedroom and the second bedroom. In the second bedroom you wouldn’t be able to fit DD’s desk, wardrobe and toy storage alongside a double bed. In DD2’s bedroom you could fit a double bed but very little else, maybe a bedside table. DC3’s bedroom wouldn’t fit a double bed at all. And that’s a larger than average house.
Aroundtheworldin80moves · 22/01/2022 15:35

I think it depends on the age of the house. Our Post War House fits a super king in the the Master, a double in the second and a small double in the third bedroom. But we have only one bathroom...

TheLazyBeagle · 22/01/2022 15:38

Our master is pretty huge, you could fit 3 doubles in it. The rest of the rooms are much smaller though.

SirSamuelVimes · 22/01/2022 16:08

Post war 3-bed semi detached. A double would fit in two of the three bedrooms but not the third. There's not much space for anything else once a double bed is in though - certainly no playing space once you've added wardrobe and chest of drawers. And our room sizes are much more generous than a standard modern 3bed.

One of the reasons I wouldn't put a double in the second bedroom would be that it would mean one DD had a double and another had a single. Unfair.

I'm sure it's nice if you have all huge rooms but it's definitely not needed. I had a single bed til 18, then went traveling (all manner of single beds all over the world in various hostels, camps etc), then into uni halls into another single bed. Had a small double in private uni houses for the next three years, so I was 24 ish before I first had a full sized double.

Luxembourgmama · 22/01/2022 16:40

We have a double. So practical when they need cuddles at night we all get sleep.

Original poster
User135792468 · 22/01/2022 22:11

@CheeseMmmm

Sorry OP reread.

Why were group of mums from playgroup in DC bedroom?

Unless one of those houses have to go through bedroom to get to toilet or something.

It was an NCT friend and her dc. The dc were all playing upstairs and we heard some shouting and banging so just went up to see what they were doing. Hence, she saw the bed.

I promise I wasn’t bragging about my child having a double bed… I’m not sure that’s even something you can brag about?

The topic then came up at a dinner a few days later with all nct friends as the discussion turned to when people were transitioning their youngest out of their cot / cot bed.

I do think there’s an element of people thinking it’s spoiling a child which I just don’t personally agree with. Maybe also an element of others not being willing / able to get their dc a double bed. I just don’t get why people would care.

OP posts:
CheeseMmmm · 22/01/2022 22:18

That makes sense! I have met some people who insist on showing you round their house and while sometimes like a nose, people making you I don't like!

It's a mix of things I'd say. As per things said earlier.

I mean just ignore them obv!

As well as things earlier, when I was growing up it was vvvvv unusual for child or teen etc to have a double so there's a bit of surprise maybe leading to weird comments. Maybe. They're all younger than me though I'm sure!

CheeseMmmm · 22/01/2022 22:21

And yes vv few houses were ever built to fit doubles in rooms generally.

Esp new builds dunno if changed now but some have ludicrous small rooms.

Friend about 20 years ago had house, supposed to be 3 beds.

  1. Big enough double but good luck furniture.
  2. Big enough single ditto furniture.
  3. Big enough large cot Def not bed.

In London nice location etc so while ??? also if got baby then no probs. Until they grow a bit! Then move I suppose.

CheeseMmmm · 22/01/2022 22:25

Ours 50s semi 3rd room box room single only.

Victorian terraces near Def not double except master.

Loads of house building apart from those 2 that I'm aware of 30s. Can't imagine those mass suburban builds semis beds double all rooms.

Flat blocks unlikely any era.

I mean the styles when these big building efforts happened.

That's guess, no expert!

CheeseMmmm · 22/01/2022 22:26

Ha just remembered. DH got relative 30sc standard semi 2x double one single.

These days so so expensive here that double beds all over place makes imagine mansion!

Prob Def depends on where live?

CheeseMmmm · 22/01/2022 22:27

Or how much money got obv!

minniep · 22/01/2022 22:35

My dds share a room so we have bunk beds. The top bed is single and the bottom one is a double. The 9 year old is on the top bunk and the two year old gets the double. She has been in it since she was one. As others have said it's fabulous to lie down and cuddle and read stories and if she is unwell or very unsettled then we can sleep with her . It works really well for us

New posts on this thread. Refresh page