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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Comments about toddlers in double beds

200 replies

User135792468 · 21/01/2022 20:40

I have a 4 and 2.5 year old and the 4 year old has had a double bed bed since he came out of the cot bed so I could use it for ds2. A few weeks back, we decided that it was time to get ds2 his first proper bed and also went for a double.

The amount of comments I’ve had about how a toddler doesn’t need a double bed and a bit of an eye roll that I got them one is starting to irritate me. I don’t understand why people care? We like the doubles as we lay in bed and read books before bed and the dc like having sleepovers with each other. It seems as though people think it’s an odd way to one-up someone though.

To clarify, I wasn’t discussing it, just had friends over for a play date who then saw it and mentioned it in a bigger group of friends when we were out and it became a topic of conversation. There’s plenty of space for wardrobes and floor space to play so I don’t get the issue.

Is it that odd to have a double bed for young dc who are either pre school or primary age? What does everyone else have out of curiosity?

Yabu - yes, toddlers really don’t need a double bed

Yanbu - people need to mind their own business

OP posts:
Smeds · 21/01/2022 22:35

If you have the space then great. I'm rather jealous, I didn't have a double bed until i was 21 and moved into a flatshare at uni. I remember my mum saying that "double beds weren't for children" when i queried getting one when we moved house. I was 18 Confused

Anoisagusaris · 21/01/2022 22:36

Some of you are batshit crazy. My kids have king size beds …..don’t let your heads explode now. And they have perfectly appropriate lovely children’s bedrooms with loads of space to play as the rooms are very large.

LadyPropane · 21/01/2022 22:37

I much prefer using a single bed in my child's room because it leaves more space for other things. Children are so small that a double bed seems a waste of the space to me, BUT I have quite a small house so space is an issue. If you have plenty of space then I really can't see what harm a double bed would do.

NoRaceInThisHorse · 21/01/2022 22:39

Some batshit comments on this thread.
Who the hell cares what style or size of bed a strangers children sleep in!

BunsyGirl · 21/01/2022 22:39

My oldest DS has had a double bed since he was five. My youngest has two single beds in his room but prefers his brother’s double!

woodhill · 21/01/2022 22:42

@Anoisagusaris

Some of you are batshit crazy. My kids have king size beds …..don’t let your heads explode now. And they have perfectly appropriate lovely children’s bedrooms with loads of space to play as the rooms are very large.
Hate changing the bed linen on my own bed let alone doubles for dcs
BertieBotts · 21/01/2022 22:42

I mean, it doesn't matter, and if you have enough floor space then it really doesn't matter, but children are smaller than adults and can quite easily share a single bed with no problems. I've also never found there wasn't enough space to get into bed with a toddler and read stories when it's a single.

So it is strange and the reasoning for why it's better isn't really sound. But do what you what? I have a slide bed for my toddler which I'm sure some people would turn their nose up at, but I love it.

cantkeepawayforever · 21/01/2022 22:44

Obviously very odd here - 21 and 19 year olds, when home, both have the single beds we bought when they came out of their cot before they were 2.....

New mattresses every now and again, and have double duvets, but both completely happy with singles. D's has a single at uni, d's a small double.

We have a separate spare room with a double fold out bed.

Flea456 · 21/01/2022 22:44

Can’t believe that people care. If you have the space, a double is great. Fun for when friends come over, more comfortable and you won’t have to get them a bigger bed when they’re 6’2” and hairy.

Sienna9522 · 21/01/2022 22:49

YANBU - I’ve just bought my 4 year old a double bed. It makes sense. Will last longer. And it will be nice to get in and read her stories comfortably rather than squeezing into a single. She’s a tall girl as well and needs her space.

Tsuni · 21/01/2022 22:52

Is this just a stealth brag to tell us you’ve got big rooms and presumably a big house?
Why do you care what they think?

BertieBotts · 21/01/2022 22:52

I find the last longer comments are a bit of a culture shock! I only know two of my school friends who got a double bed when they were a teenager. The rest of us stayed in a single bed until we moved out of home. That includes every boyfriend I had as well.

HelloFrostyMorning · 21/01/2022 22:54

YANBU @User135792468 it's fuck all to do with anyone else!

Nefelibata86 · 21/01/2022 22:56

My under 2 year old is on our old king sized mattress to help with us settling him and so that there is an option for when guests stay over. I didn’t see point of doing away with a perfectly good bed. It is still clearly his room with his books and stuffed toys all around on shelves. Another factor I’ve not seen mentioned here though is that I don’t intend to keep his toys in their for now generally. We struggle to get him to sleep as it is so have avoided keeping many toys around so as not to overly stimulate him around bedtimes. Maybe I’m missing something and this would make him more keen to spend time there …

User135792468 · 21/01/2022 22:56

Thanks everyone for confirming what I thought! I love cuddling with my dc and just reading and laying in bed. Ds4 is also very excited that he’ll have sleepovers in his little brothers room as well as in his own room.

I do think the comments I’ve received are due to them believing that they don’t “need” a double but there are plenty of other things that children don’t need. Maybe also because some of their children don’t have doubles / space for them. I can’t imagine a world though in which I would care about a friends child’s bedroom furniture.

I love having lots of space to spread out and my two starfish agree Grin

OP posts:
ClemDanFango · 21/01/2022 22:56

Unusual but wouldn’t bother me.

HelloFrostyMorning · 21/01/2022 22:57

@User135792468 I think the haterz are jealous tbh. Some people didn't even have their own bedroom as a child and shared with 3 siblings. They didn't even have their own bed, and slept in a box in the corner. They ate out of a bowl on the floor, and begged for scraps of bread for supper.

How DARE you give you child a double bed to sleep in? ^YAWNNNN!' Wink

CallMeNutribullet · 21/01/2022 22:58

It's unusual to me because I had a single until I was an adult but it's really no one's business but yours.

CheeseMmmm · 21/01/2022 22:59

'That includes every boyfriend I had as well.'

Ha yes indeed!

Could get cosy...

My BF when 19 moved skanky shared house. Couldn't afford bed or in fact any furniture.

He did a 'pallet bed'. Nicked empty pallets of some kind of used building stuff dump. (They weren't so valuable then!).

Stacked up got piece of foam cut maybe 4 inch thick. (Not fancy foam, this was 80s!).

Put on top BOOM bed!

It was smaller than a single. We both small but... But exactly roomy!

Stayed his maybe 5 nights a week 😂😂😂

CheeseMmmm · 21/01/2022 23:00

My one friend double bed early 80s school mate. Was vv wealthy tbf.

Double beds amazing.

If can afford and got space then good for you why the fuck not!!!

Largethighsbadeyes · 21/01/2022 23:04

I had this OP!

Got DD a small double for first "big girl" bed and in laws said I was spoiling her 🙄

HardbackWriter · 21/01/2022 23:05

@BertieBotts

I find the last longer comments are a bit of a culture shock! I only know two of my school friends who got a double bed when they were a teenager. The rest of us stayed in a single bed until we moved out of home. That includes every boyfriend I had as well.
I actually had a single for a long time even when I left home - after breaking up with a boyfriend I lived with (obviously we had a double!) I lived in a really grotty houseshare where I had the smallest and cheapest room and it had a single. That's where I lived when now DH and I first got together and he used to regularly sleep over and we'd both squeeze in - ah to be young, thin, and not that fussed about getting any sleep again!

I do sort of instinctively feel that a toddler in a double bed is sort of dangerously decadent but that's obviously mad and irrational of me and people should furnish their own homes however they choose!

TooManyPJs · 21/01/2022 23:05

I do find it weird that do many children have doubles these days. When I was growing up all children of any age and size had a single bed probably until you left home. And it was never an issue. I'm not sure why they are needed. Even when I was a teenager we all slept with friends in single beds topping and tailing.

More expensive, more expensive sheets, bigger room needed.

But if you can afford it and want one I suppose it no different to any other unnecessary thing.

Dancingonmoonlight · 21/01/2022 23:06

I always had a double bed growing up and automatically bought the same for DC1.
When DC2 came along, there was no option but to buy a single bed due to the room layout. DC2 absolutely hates having a single bed!

People are very odd to care about other people's furniture. Making it a topic of conversation is even odder.

I remember ex colleagues of mine thought it was very strange that my children did not share a bedroom. I always thought my ex colleagues were odd for even thinking about where other people's children slept in their own houses.

Eightmagpies · 21/01/2022 23:07

Both my two have doubles. It means we can jump in with them and it's something they'd request in the future anyway.

I think it's odd your friend commented