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AIBU?

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Original poster

Am I staying in too much with baby?!

82 replies

Ftm229 · 19/01/2022 11:43

Posting here for hopefully more responses as I'm in need of some advice!!

I'm a first time mum of an almost 4 month old baby. He has/had? (much better now) reflux which was difficult and I had a c section after a failed induction which made things difficult for a while but I'm still really struggling to get out and about with him.

Here are my excuses! He hates his pram and screams to be held so I use an Ergo baby carrier - however its almost impossible to get this on myself without assistance or without really pissing baby off. Secondly, he does not sleep in the car/pram/carrier and therefore becomes overtired and cries hysterically until I cuddle him to sleep. This isnt a problem at home but out and about it can be difficult!

He's a lovely smiley little thing during his "wake windows" but they are still fairly short (about an hour before he starts showing tired signs again).

In addition our house has steps to the front door so I can't get the pram down alone (not that he will go in it). We live in a seaside town not far from the beach, but the actual area we are in isn't that nice which is off-putting in terms of going for a short walk near home - we are looking to move.

These factors combined put me off going out. I realise I sound like I'm making excuses here! I do a lot of reading/playing/interacting with baby at home but is he missing out? We are going swimming on Friday at least.

Advice welcome!

OP posts:
Worried456776 · 19/01/2022 20:59

Depends how your mood is are going feeling down at all ? Because going for a quick walk will help slightly. Otherwise don’t worry about it at all! I stressed about this but really they don’t need to go out at that age ! It’s toddlers who get bored at home and need entertaining. Just stay home if you want too especially if your still recovering. It’s better when they can’t move 😂

Thatsplentyjack · 19/01/2022 21:46

It certainly wasn't so I could SAY I'd been out for a walk, it was so I could HAVE a walk which I found absolutely to my mental health, was a sure fire way of knowing the baby would have a nap at that time. And I happen to enjoy walking in the elements. My point was not to congratulate myself on anything, it was to say that objectively speaking, in most parts of the British Isles, the weather is rarely a true barrier to getting out and about if that is something you value and think important.

No, what you did was berate women who don't fancy going and walking for hours in the shite weather with a little baby, AND if you had read the OP, the baby doesn't sleep in the pram, so maybe walking helped your mental health (getting out also helps mine, but not walking around in the pelting rain) but it doesn't for some people.

theleafandnotthetree · 19/01/2022 23:13

@Thatsplentyjack

It certainly wasn't so I could SAY I'd been out for a walk, it was so I could HAVE a walk which I found absolutely to my mental health, was a sure fire way of knowing the baby would have a nap at that time. And I happen to enjoy walking in the elements. My point was not to congratulate myself on anything, it was to say that objectively speaking, in most parts of the British Isles, the weather is rarely a true barrier to getting out and about if that is something you value and think important.

No, what you did was berate women who don't fancy going and walking for hours in the shite weather with a little baby, AND if you had read the OP, the baby doesn't sleep in the pram, so maybe walking helped your mental health (getting out also helps mine, but not walking around in the pelting rain) but it doesn't for some people.

I didn't berate anyone, I was responding to some posters who were claiming the winter weather as a barrier to going outside which it clearly isn't. And using my own experience as an example. But clearly you've decided I'm some sort of superior bitch so whatever Hmm
Thinking2041 · 19/01/2022 23:23

4 months old? Your baby just needs you.
The only thing they say is that exposure to daylight (ideally in the morning) can help babies establish their day/night rhythms.

Soon a time will come when you really will have to get them out for fresh air and a run around every day so enjoy the home time whilst it lasts!

PinkSyCo · 20/01/2022 00:27

Don’t feel pressurised into going out if you don’t want to/it’s difficult for you. At 4 months old your baby really won’t care. Hopefully things will improve for you by springtime when he will be more of an age where he can sit up in a pushchair and enjoy taking in the view of things going on around him and you will enjoy nice walks in warmer weather too. ☀️

Sceptre86 · 20/01/2022 08:24

Really depends on you. I'm out three or our times a week with baby but it's always to do something like a baby group, shopping, picking up kids from school or nursery. I don't understand the need of some people to get out the house everyday as they would go crazy, I find there is lots to do at home before my other kids come home from school. I do want to make more of an effort to go to the park once the kids get home as the weather gets lighter.

TheWayTheLightFalls · 20/01/2022 08:27

Up to you but please don’t let it become a thing.

Do up the back buckle on the Ergo first, then put your head and arms through like a shirt. Or get a babybjorn (fastens at the front, way easier). Find somewhere to go, and go.

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