So I'm a mother married to a black Irish guy. He was born here but still maintains a lot of his culture.
Our relationship is lovely and thankfully we've had few issues however one of the few things we clash on is what we allow our daughter to do. She's a good girl and doesn't have many friends but got envious of seeing her other classmates go out to parties and have fun. I was okay with this (even knowing there was alcohol). I told her that if there was, that she should drink in moderation. This was when she was 16.
My husband thinks it's not acceptable as it could distract her from her studies. He's not really a big drinker (as well as his family). Even though she's almost a few months from 18, he's still not comfortable with her having a glass of wine during her birthday which is coming up at the start of February.
I think he's being a bit extreme. I remember when I was at that age, I went out with my friends, partied, and drank a bit. Even smoked a bit of weed. My parents maintained a 'harm reduction' approach. They never encouraged me to take drugs/alcohol and told me too much could substantially impact my life but they allowed me to have drinks once in a while to remove the taboo aspect that draws many teens into substances.
I got good grades and went to a good college and drink a lot more then while still focusing on my studies. My husband and I really doesn't see eye to eye on this. Am I being unreasonable.