Should we stay with my wife's parents?

[beatsandbikes76]

Hi, i'm new here, and really looking for some advice.

We are planning a family trip to the US, and my wife who is American wants us to stay with her parents for about a week, the only problem is they live right on a major freeway. The only thing separating the freeway from the house is a breeze block wall which is less than 10m from one of the busiest freeways in the area.

I am VERY concerned about pollution levels from this major freeway and the harm it may cause my children who are 10yrs and 6yrs.

We have stayed at the house previously on more than one occasion, when my first born was a baby for about 2 weeks at a time, admittedly i was not as aware of the freeway, or the potential harm from pollution. However, since that time, there has been more awareness of the dangers of pollution in the news, and my first born was diagnosed with ADHD last year, and although its difficult to say if there is a correlation, it has made me think more about the potential harm of traffic pollution and particulate matter on babies and children.

My wife really wants to stay with her parents from an emotional and also cost saving perspective, however am I being unreasonable to suggest we do not stay at the house this time round?

thanks

Your poor poor child. I feel so sorry for them.

If you were so concerned about their health you would look into and learn about their disorder properly rather than throwing around misinformation about what caused it.

@PikachuAndMe

Your poor poor child. I feel so sorry for them.

If you were so concerned about their health you would look into and learn about their disorder properly rather than throwing around misinformation about what caused it.

@PikachuAndMe

trust me, i have and we're very supportive, given lockdown we went private and got a diagnosis as soon as we could, pls don't take my query out of context, you don't know me or my family. thanks x

Oh god

Your poor poor child. I feel so sorry for them.

If you were so concerned about their health you would look into and learn about their disorder properly rather than throwing around misinformation about what caused it.

Harsh.

OP ignore spiteful comments like this. You clearly love your children very much. Well done though for taking the nicer comments on board and agreeing to stay at the in-laws. Try not to worry and happy holidays.

@Kite22

As someone who has voted, when I open the thread, the poll is visible.

267 people have now voted and you have 99% saying YABU and 1% now with you.

@Kite22 at least its quite a popular thread 300+ votes and counting lol

In the US houses by freeways always have big fences. YABU and more than a little bit snobbish.

I'm sorry that some of the responses have been unnecessarily unkind.

It's clear that you're a very caring and involved Dad and your children are very very lucky to have you.

I do think your anxiety has been clouding your judgement on this matter. I don't think your children will come to any harm in the space of a week and it's certainly not worth upsetting your wife or parents in law. Speaking as a healthcare professional who works with ADHD, the evidence you allude to is not robust.

You responded very well to the feedback on this thread (despite some of it being unnecessarily harsh) and I commend you for that. I suggest possibly joining a facebook group or support group for parents of children with ADHD to help support you as you get used to your child's diagnosis. I have seen many children with ADHD do exceptional things and it's not the end of the world. x

It's a week! They'll be fine!

(if you're really worried, by an air purifier and keep it in the bedroom while they sleep)

@Flutterflybutterby

It's a week! They'll be fine!

thank you x

@taylorwilde

I'm sorry that some of the responses have been unnecessarily unkind.

It's clear that you're a very caring and involved Dad and your children are very very lucky to have you.

I do think your anxiety has been clouding your judgement on this matter. I don't think your children will come to any harm in the space of a week and it's certainly not worth upsetting your wife or parents in law. Speaking as a healthcare professional who works with ADHD, the evidence you allude to is not robust.

You responded very well to the feedback on this thread (despite some of it being unnecessarily harsh) and I commend you for that. I suggest possibly joining a facebook group or support group for parents of children with ADHD to help support you as you get used to your child's diagnosis. I have seen many children with ADHD do exceptional things and it's not the end of the world. x

thank you x