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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

CF tipped guide in obsolete notes

152 replies

FloraPostIt · 14/01/2022 08:31

I recently went on a group tour. I was a single traveller with a group of other single travellers from various countries and an amazing local guide. It was two weeks. The guide's income has been massively hit by COVID and he has a young family so tips at the end of the tour are a massive deal for him.

On the last night one of the group had collected tips from everyone - about £50 in local currency each - and gave a little speech. We all applauded and thanked him.

Shortly after going to bed I got a WhatsApp message from the guide with a photo of some UK notes asking if they were valid. I was the only UK traveller.

I knew exactly who had put them in. On the first day a woman from the US had tried to exchange about £100 in £10 notes but couldn't as they were the old paper ones. She asked me to buy them off her and bring them back to the UK. I said I'd need to think about it - I'd only just met her, wasn't 100% I could change them and live nowhere near a bank anyway. I heard no more. But she knew they were worthless in that country.

By the time I got the message from the guide, she had already left for the airport as she was the first to go.

I met the guide next morning and he was upset and begging me to help. I agreed to bring the notes back, try to change them and transfer the money. I explained it would likely be a few weeks. It has been less than a week and I'm getting pleading messages urging me not to forget and I'm feeling terrible. I will most likely go into the city tomorrow to try and deal, which is a huge faff.

I spoke to the woman who took the collection and she was fuming and had no idea. She is much more assertive than me and sent CF a message who replied with a link saying the notes were valid as they could be taken to a bank in the UK. Assertive woman pointed out that Guide had never been to Europe in his life.

I kind of want to message CF and make this her problem, not mine, as I'm feeling guilty and stewing. However I'm rubbish at confrontation and am worried this would make md feel worse. I'm afraid I'm a very un-Munsnetty drip. WIBU to message CF? Any advice?

I also feel that if she was going to palm off her useless notes she could at least have put all £100 in but she only put in half.

OP posts:
RoseSays · 14/01/2022 09:16

@FloraPostIt

I have his bank details (which I still need to make sense of!). But I'm also worried about being flagged for money laundering. I may be overthinking!
Jeez you are so over thinking this. CF did a shit thing. You are helping out the guide - (who you like and think is a nice person, and presumably has a much lower standard of living than you) a small favour by going to a bank/posting the old notes and exchanging the money, all of which is legit. The time you've spent on this thread this little admin job would have been finished! How do you get anything done in life?!? Why do you begrudge doing such a small favour to a fellow human being who needs your help? They were unlucky there wasn't another Brit on the holiday - you are obviously not a kind person.
Bettyfromlondon · 14/01/2022 09:18

Also, to add, the tips in these tours are not top-ups. They are essential income. These tour companies give explicit instructions as to the expected daily rates for guides and drivers.

Foolsrule · 14/01/2022 09:18

Annoying but not such a big drama. Go to bank, swap notes, transfer online. Job done.

SunnySideDownBriefly · 14/01/2022 09:19

Oh Flora, I can see why this has upset you and it's very unfair on everyone. But really, for your own sake and the guide, it can all be sorted out fairly simply and there won't be any money laundering issues! It was really kind of you to offer to help the poor guide and it may be that the language barrier (assume there is one?) means the language is coming across as quite desperate. Take a deep breath, forget that horrible woman who created the situation, and just help the guide out as soon as you can. You're doing a good deed. A very good deed.

Original poster
FloraPostIt · 14/01/2022 09:20

I feel so much better after posting (although re-reading my post I do sound like a petulant arse!). I'm not annoyed at the guide at all. I think unpicking why I posted I was really wanting some kind of justice and to make CF suffer the consequences. But that isn't helpful or realistic. Or indeed nice or graceful.

I will sail swan-like into the bank tomorrow and move on.

OP posts:
Getyourjinglebellsinarow · 14/01/2022 09:20

I would have just bought the notes off him so he wasn't out of pocket and waiting for you to get round to going to the bank. Of course the bank will exchange them. Feel sorry for the poor man being fucked around after working so hard.

DrSbaitso · 14/01/2022 09:21

There's nothing she could do from the US and she'd only ignore it anyway.

I'd go to the bank and sort it at my first convenience, and ignore his communication until then, after telling him when I intend to do it.

MrsMoastyToasty · 14/01/2022 09:22

Any UK bank will exchange obsolete notes for face called, even pre-decimal notes. You're overthinking it.

MordredsOrrery · 14/01/2022 09:23

You can also deposit the money into your bank account at a post office counter if it's easier to get to a post office than a bank for you?

SandyPanda · 14/01/2022 09:23

Just go to the bank and transfer it as soon as you can. The guide sounds desperate.

sonjadog · 14/01/2022 09:25

I would go as soon as you can. If the guide is messaging you, he must be really desperate for the money.

SwanShaped · 14/01/2022 09:28

Maybe you’re also a bit annoyed at yourself about not feeling assertive. And that’s clouding your view on the situation.

MatildaTheCat · 14/01/2022 09:28

Is CF on FB? You could post on her wall that she’s made a ‘mistake’ and left the guide in a difficult situation. Unfortunately that’s the only thing I can think of to shame her and frankly she sounds pretty shameless.

Lovelydovey · 14/01/2022 09:32

I would report her to the tour company too - she should be banned from future trips for that behaviour.

canigooutyet · 14/01/2022 09:34

I wouldn't transfer directly from your bank as the fees can be astronomical, open an account with something like Revolut who do not charge.

MarshmallowFondant · 14/01/2022 09:36

@Lovelydovey

I would report her to the tour company too - she should be banned from future trips for that behaviour.
Yes it's cheeky fuckery, especially as the woman had spoken to OP who had told her the notes were out of date.

But banning her for not giving an optional gratuity correctly? As if.

mindutopia · 14/01/2022 09:36

I have (non-British) family in the US and they are alway given old notes when they get money to come here. I don't know if US banks don't understand that they aren't technically valid anymore, or they just can't be asked to exchange them themselves, so just keep giving them out to people.

I also though would not be too hard on this woman. In the US, we have all sorts of old currency in circulation (I'm half American, though live in the UK, but grew up there). It isn't really a thing that a particular note goes out of circulation because they issue a new one. So she likely wouldn't have really understood what a pain it is, as it's not a big deal in the US at all if you have an old note.

Sounds like you are doing a kind thing helping him out though.

AllThatFancyPaintsAsFair · 14/01/2022 09:37

@MrsMoastyToasty

Any UK bank will exchange obsolete notes for face called, even pre-decimal notes. You're overthinking it.
They really won't. The most recent ones yes but not my bank for the older versions

Not really a problem as I sent then to the Bank of England and got the money but I wouldn't expect a local high street branch to take them

I looked it up at the time and as far as I could find the bank was totally within their rights to say to send them off.

SnowDropMania · 14/01/2022 09:38

@sonjadog

I would go as soon as you can. If the guide is messaging you, he must be really desperate for the money.
Yes, or pay the guide now and then sort out the money when you can, as he sounds desperate. The cf is horrible
ancientgran · 14/01/2022 09:41

@FloraPostIt

I feel so much better after posting (although re-reading my post I do sound like a petulant arse!). I'm not annoyed at the guide at all. I think unpicking why I posted I was really wanting some kind of justice and to make CF suffer the consequences. But that isn't helpful or realistic. Or indeed nice or graceful.

I will sail swan-like into the bank tomorrow and move on.

When you have it sorted why not send her a nice message? Just say the guide was so upset as he relies on the money but she mustn't worry as you have sorted it all out for her.

Let's her know that people know what she did, that she upset this poor bloke and you are a much better person than she is.

Beautiful3 · 14/01/2022 09:42

There's no point being spiteful or awkward about it. As it only affects the guide. Pop to the bank when you can and send back the money. Think of the guide.

IamtheDevilsAvocado · 14/01/2022 09:42

@FloraPostIt

I have his bank details (which I still need to make sense of!). But I'm also worried about being flagged for money laundering. I may be overthinking!
Doubt it for less than £100....!

It will make so much difference to this guide if he's living in a developing country

goldfluffyclouds · 14/01/2022 09:44

Good to read your updates and that you will send on the money. Unfortunately i suspect it will incurr an international money transfer charge if it is going to the guides bank account in his country, which can be £10-£25 depending on your bank. For this reason I would see if its possible to arrange a meeting with the manager of your branch before you go in, explain the situation and ask if they have discretion to waive these sundry fees in this instance.
I can understand the sense of annoyance that a CF has got away with it... Depending on what information you have - I would be tempted to name and shame the CF on social media if you can identify her. If not, then a strongly worded letter to the tour company which although they can't compel her to pay, they may choose to not take her business, or reimburse the tour guide themselves.

IDidntKnowItWasAParty · 14/01/2022 09:47

Just go to a bank OP. You can do this. I understand your anxiety, but you're blowing this out of all proportion. Go to the bank, get them to put the money in your account, and then transfer the money to the Guide (ask the bank the best/easiest way to do this). Forget about the CF.

Gonnagetgoing · 14/01/2022 09:48

@Getyourjinglebellsinarow

I would have just bought the notes off him so he wasn't out of pocket and waiting for you to get round to going to the bank. Of course the bank will exchange them. Feel sorry for the poor man being fucked around after working so hard.
@Getyourjinglebellsinarow - that is exactly what I'd have done too. So he had the money ASAP instead of him having to chase you.

I'd also want to leave as many good reviews for this man and maybe even tip him a bit more, if I had it, as he's been inconvenienced and in a sense, ripped off.

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