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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Not seen neighbours in weeks lights and heating on

351 replies

stillwaitingonaring · 13/01/2022 10:14

Been thinking to myself the last week or so how weird it is that we haven't seen the neighbours in weeks probably coming up to a month now. Every single light on in the house and heating on all day and night.

They have had lots of police involvement in the past, she had 4 older children with learning difficulties police were being called out so many times a week. Her children are normally jumping on the car roof slamming doors etc. Not seen or heard a peep from them since mid December. I always felt sorry for her because it seemed like she couldn't cope with all of them in that small house they were running her ragged.

I knocked on yesterday morning and obviously no answer, is this something you would report to the police or just leave it?

OP posts:
ApolloandDaphne · 13/01/2022 13:12

Sounds like they have done a bunk but just left everything on. It suggests they left quickly.

FortunesFave · 13/01/2022 13:13

I hesitated to call the police when I kept seeing my neighbour's flat door half open...this was when I lived in a big council tower in London and he lived on a different floor....the lift kept stopping on his floor for some reason...there was never anyone there and I'd be standing in the lift, on my way down (I lived on the 18th floor and he on the 13th) and I'd see his door ajar. Happened about 4 times then one day the police called round...doing house to house enquiries. He'd been murdered and had been lying in the hallway just behind the door. :(

He was quite old. I'd seen him arguing with a younger man the day before he died....and I did tell the police that but I remember how bad I'd felt that I never got out of the lift and checked or called the police.

It was London...I was young and naive.

Iputthetrampintrampoline · 13/01/2022 13:25

I think you have totally done the right thing, I would have done the same.

BoodleBug51 · 13/01/2022 13:28

DD lives in a HA property, and the other half of her semi was let to a single mum with 2 children last summer. DD said that she doesn't think that they've ever spent a night there! She told DD that she has moved in with her new partner but doesn't want to let the house go in case it doesn't work out Angry so a 3 bed newly refurbished home is just sitting empty. She had the cheek to ask DD to ring her if anyone from the HA is ever out there........... and has managed to dodge any inspections thanks to Covid.

DD and I have both complained repeatedly to the HA manager but nothing ever happens. It's very common apparently...... but bloody well shouldn't be with the amount of homeless people Sad

Tay17 · 13/01/2022 13:31

That’s lovely of you to care. Hope everything’s okay!

Darbs76 · 13/01/2022 13:31

1000% the right thing to report this

MarineBlue33 · 13/01/2022 13:37

I hope there is a positive update, in that they just moved

TatianaBis · 13/01/2022 13:41

Most likely they’ve just done a runner.

mogkat · 13/01/2022 13:46

Good idea to report it. Police / housing association can do a wellness check.

Pinkbrush · 13/01/2022 13:47

Glad you called the police. Fingers crossed it’s nothing sinister.

theworldsgonefeckingmad · 13/01/2022 13:47

So lovely of you to go to that trouble, I hope they are all ok Thanks

Santaisstilleatingmincepies · 13/01/2022 13:48

So glad you have reported op. A recent news item saw a young dm take the life of herself and 2 very young dc. A week before their bodies were discovered... All family coming forward now saying eh how close they were etc. A week and not one called round. 2 babies and nobody was interested.
Very sad.
Can't imagine not checking up ony dd if she had 2 small dc or not...

MrsPotatoHead22 · 13/01/2022 13:49

I hope they're all okay

saraclara · 13/01/2022 13:50

If the lights are on 24/7 I'd be really concerned. I hope they've just done a flit.

worriedatthemoment · 13/01/2022 13:54

Police was the right call

iheartredsquirrels · 13/01/2022 13:57

If there had been an incident it's most likely that the police etc would be on the premises with forensics / ambulances etc and the house cordoned off.
Sorry, but your oh sounds an arse with his remark and I'd have lost some respect for him under the circumstances.

Xenia · 13/01/2022 14:00

I would see if any other neighbours know more and perhaps go and look through the windows. Lights on all day and night is unusual. leaving one on whilst away to pretend to burglars you are in is not unusual but full heating and lights is rare. On the crime shows it is loads of flies that tends to indicate dead bodies but hopefully it is nothing like that.

Ugzbugz · 13/01/2022 14:01

Very strange, what ages are her children? Just wondering if they've been reported missing from school or appointments etc.

Wagsandclaws · 13/01/2022 14:02

I think if she had school age children that someone at the school would have raised the alarm by now but I also think you are definitely right to raise this with the police - fingers crossed all is ok and there is an ok explanation for it.

Toolatebaby · 13/01/2022 14:06

Well done for being a good neighbour and checking up on this.
I don't care if people call me interfering I would rather be a busy body and wrong than have ignored something worse.

justanoldhack · 13/01/2022 14:09

Well done for reporting, hope they're ok

Booklover3 · 13/01/2022 14:09

I’m glad you reported that. I would have

MorningStarling · 13/01/2022 14:11

Personally I'd have stayed out of it, if there's been no sign of them for a month it'd be too late to help them anyway. These things tend to resolve themselves, one way or another. Maybe it's just that my neighbours are the sort of people you're glad if they've gone out for the night, let alone the month.

I did have a similar situation with one neighbour once, they suddenly vanished but with the lights left on. Didn't see them for three months, one day they just turned up again and carried on as if they'd never been away. Don't know where they went, maybe they'd been locked up for a few weeks.

You hear the odd horror story but the vast majority of the time these peculiar occurrences have a very boring outcome.

sazzy5 · 13/01/2022 14:11

Glad you reported it, I would be the same as you.

Namechange13101 · 13/01/2022 14:15

You definitely did the right thing. I’ve got a number of friends that work for the police and they always say report it as better to be safe. Hope theyre all ok

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