Menopause

[Poptart4]

There have been alot of stories in the press about celebrities going through menopause. The latest being Lisa Snowden. See Daily fail.

At this point I will hold my hands up and say I now very little about menopause even though I'm a women in her late 30's. But these horror stories are really scaring me. Does every women going through the menopause go through hell? Is this what I have to look forward to? And do these symptoms (memory loss, depression, rages, sweats... God knows what else) eventually stop?

I can't believe no one has ever talked to me about menopause before. It wasn't even mentioned in school.

Peri & menopause aren’t spoken about nearly enough &, if they are mentioned, it’s with a laugh & a joke about hot flushes.

Looking back, my peri menopause symptoms were horrific.
The rage was unreal, the anxiety was hell, the memory issues! Peri can last for 10 years.

I had a hysterectomy mid 40’s so started HRT and the instant change in me was amazing. I wish I had recognised the symptoms and spoken to the Dr about HRT a few years earlier, it could have saved me a lot of grief.

Shocking to think Peri symptoms can start in some women in their mid 30’s and so many women don’t know they can start HRT during peri menopause. Mind you, reading some threads, some Drs don’t know either!

I'm on HRT at 41 whilst I still have regular periods. Anxiety, rage and night wakings all stopped. Plus my skin looks much less crepey!

It’s not hellish for everyone. The sweats were relatively short lived for me and HRT has sorted the other symptoms.

I'm 41 and definitely have peri menopause symptoms, rage, anxiety, lack of sleep, memory loss, feeling hot all the time, feeling down. My mum had early menopause but didn't tell me a thing about it and now she's gone, it's my dad telling me this.
I found the davina macall documentary on C4 quite helpful, I recognised a lot of the above from watching that then asked my dad about mum.

I haven't spoken to my doctor yet but I have an appointment coming up so will discuss it then

It's different for every woman. But it is something that happens to every woman who lives long enough. It is a significant life stage that lasts a long time and that brings multiple considerations with it.

It's good that it's being talked about. Previously women were put on psychotropic drugs and left to deal with the taboo physical effects.

As for how it will affect you in the future, no one can say. But if you have the knowledge that this is going to happen and may hit you like a train then that's more knowledge than you would have had ten years previous.

And if it does hit you like a train, you can take steps. If it doesn't, you can also take steps because menopause affects women holistically in terms of brain/bone/heart health way into to their later decades, even if they don't have troublesome symptoms at the time per se.

It's not awful for all women. Some sail through it, others have a tough time, others are something in the middle. HRT is available if you want/need it, or you can take supplements, but many women take it as it comes. It's a normal part of a woman's life.

I'm through it and a few years out the other side now. I feel great, all the minor menopause symptoms I had have gone and I'm embracing this new stage of my life. I didn't take HRT but do take supplements.

The best thing you can do is inform yourself of what can happen and what you can do if you find you are struggling with symptoms.

I’m 43 and going through hell with the perimenopause.

IME it creeps up on you. Menopause is a diagnosis in retrospect- it means when you've not had ant periods for a year. So you can only say for definite after it's happened. The inset of symptoms tends to coincide with times of increased stress- ageing parents, patenting struggles, more responsibility at work etc. That was definitely the case for me so it took me ages to work out that actually my symptoms were not just due to life stressors. GPS often don't help because they tend to ascribe it all to stress or depression and prescribe antidepressants. Which is really unhelpful.

My advice from late 30s onwards is to keep an eye out for any prolonged difficulty with sleep or anxiety as well as the hot flushes etc and keep a diary record. Then if/when the time comes you can see your GP with enough information for them to take you seriously. Oh, and take the NICE guidelines with you.

Yes looking back the sleep was a big giveaway for me. I'd never had sleep issues before.

I wish I'd realised that that was what was going on before I ended up near demented, shouting at everyone in sight and bleeding like a stuck pig.

Thanks to lovely lovely hrt I'm almost fit to be out in public again but Jesus it was a nightmare.

Good for you.

I sailed through it but I went through it at 40.

It's enough to have to read about Lisa Snowden's reproductive system let alone smug Holly Willoughby!!

Forewarned is definitely forearmed - I agree that peri symptoms sort of creep up, leaving you never entirely sure if you're just a bit tired or having a slightly worse day than normal, until you realise that the drip drip effect has completely messed up what "normal" is and you're actually in a really low place. Osteoporosis really does sneak up on you because the first symptom for a lot of people is a big break from a minor fall.

I started HRT a few months ago - symptoms (insomnia, brain fog, night flushes) didn't seem unbearable but a key part of my motivation was also to maintain my bone density (family history of osteoporosis). Since starting HRT my sleep and overall mental state has been better but I hadn't quite realised how much of a difference it made until I accidentally missed a dose and was a sobbing, anxious wreck by that evening.

It's not all doom and gloom in peri, life is good, my overall health is great and I so enjoy actually being able to sleep at night. But if I hadn't known about peri I might have still been drifting on in an exhausted, anxious fog. Much better to know, and be able to take action, than to have no idea that what you're going through is common and treatable.

@lollipoprainbow

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Couldn't disagree more!

It's great your mum sailed through it, and luckily for you it does seem to be suggested we tend to follow our mums pattern in menopause.

But for many, many women it causes real issues which deserve to be talked about and deserve to be taken seriously.

It's not "droning" on. It's discussing a serious and important woman's health issue.

I'm one of the very fortunate women who didn't suffer with the menopause.
I didn't have HRT and only felt a bit of a warm flush which didn't make me sweat, unlike the hell that some other poor women go through.
My mother was the same, perhaps that has something to do with it? I don't know.
I thought I would really suffer as I had terrible periods as a young woman, but fortunately not.
I feel desperately sorry for the women who go through hell with it, it must be soul destroying.

Maybe that’s why she didn’t ‘drone’ on and on about it if it was that easy.

Yea OP it is shit. Insomnia is killing be atm. I have an appointment with my GP in the morning to beg for help. She previously said no to HRT.

When I was young I probably thought women "droned" on about it as well and it couldn't be that bad 🙄. Lucky them.

It's shit.

I mean lucky them who sailed through it. I'm now about five years into peri and have every symptom going and can't see an end to it.

I presume I am 'in' (or is it 'had') the menopause. My periods gradually began spacing out and I had my last one 2 years ago.
No discernible change in me otherwise, but I keep my head down because I feel as if I am going against the sisterhood by not having a terrible time and being on hrt.

Im 49. Sleep or lack of is hard. No sweating. We all different. But I feel drained some days

Menopause has, until recently, not been widely talked about. Was treated as a joke. It's really great that women in the spotlight are using that to discuss it. As that's what makes it normal and nothing to be embarrassed about.

I am peri menopausal and now on hrt. The rage was awful for me as was the lack of sleep, hair loss and brain fog. The brain fog was so awful I was really starting to worry it was early onset dementia. All starting to improve now I'm on hrt.

Knowledge is power and it means you can look at options open to you before discussing it with a doctor. But it isn't anything to be embarrassed about and thankfully women have options and no longer are just expected to put up with it

Agree with that. My own DM was a nightmare to be around during peri, much as I was myself before getting the hrt. If ever the subject comes up she'll say "oh I just battled on with it" and well at a distance of twenty years history I'm not going to disagree but clearly it was not plain sailing for her and she was very ragey and irrational, to the point where she actually took early retirement because there wasn't a single person left in the office who she was getting along with. And that's not even going into the effect it had on us, her children, to have her screaming and raging at us all the time. Obviously not her fault. But she definitely did struggle with it looking back, although no one talked about it then. She also now has osteoporosis and breaks bones at the drop of a hat. Her entire previous 25 years would have been very different - she'd have had more money, a better pension, been happier, very likely not have suffered the multiple broken bones and consequent gradual loss of mobility and access to leisure and other activities - had she had hrt.

It’s not shit for all of us. I’m 50 and peri menopausal. It’s ok, I have some symptoms but the worst are just inconvenient really. I keep considering HRT for the musculoskeletal and cardiovascular benefits mainly but I CBA with trying to get a GP appointment at the moment.
It does need to be discussed and understood more by everyone not just menopausal women.