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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Please help solve this argument! Pulling my hair out.

94 replies

100daysandBeyond · 09/01/2022 19:12

I will try and keep this as succinct as possible.

DC's have a very committed scooter hobby. Thanks he parts cost a bastard fortune, but they save and they are committed. A full scooter (stunt scooter, not small motor bike) is about £400-£600.

DS1 had his stolen by a bunch of 17 year old arseholes who took it off him, threatened him and then eventually sold the parts.
I borrowed money from a something else I was saving for for the house and bought him a new scooter. My thinking was, it was an outdoor activity that kept him fit and out of trouble (generally!) and he had committed many years to it and trains for competitions and so on.

DS2 is following in his footsteps and has been for about 2 years.
One kid asked to swap wheels to he could have a go, and fucked of with my sons (much better) wheels.
DS2 was gutted.

He came home and my son realise they are his wheels from his stolen scooter.

Here's this issue.

DS1 wants his wheels back. Despite me buying him a brand new scooter.
His argument is - they are his wheels. He wants them back.

DS2 says they aren't his wheels, his were stolen and without them he has none.

To stop the arguments, I bought DS2 some new wheels and DS1 got his old ones back.

Now the argument has started again, they both claim the old wheels are theirs.

Who is correct?!

I can't just chuck the wheels because wheels wear out quickly and they will be needed when the new pair wear out.

OP posts:
Original poster
100daysandBeyond · 09/01/2022 19:13

I realise this is petty non-argument to many but it's a really issue that keeps coming up and causing big arguments between two brothers that usually get on very well.

OP posts:
powershowerforanhour · 09/01/2022 19:15

Sell both scooters, wheels and all and buy them some boxing lessons.

NickiMinajerie · 09/01/2022 19:16

No idea but why are the police not involved in any of this, especially if you know who the receiver of stolen goods is.

lucillelarusso · 09/01/2022 19:16

Why don't you call the police if you know who stole the scooter?
I think the originals should be with the original owner and the others should be replaced or got back from the thief personally.
Teach your sons to stick together and hate the thief - not blame each other!

NickiMinajerie · 09/01/2022 19:18

i.e. the scrote who nicked DS2s wheels clearly bought DS1 from twunt teen. Unless insurance covered all this, all the youths thinking parts are swapsies, ought to face consequences.

rookiemere · 09/01/2022 19:22

I think when DS1 started complaining then you should have given him the option of swapping scooters ( or whatever it is) in their entirety with DS2 of leave it as it was.
You kindly bought DS1 a replacement scooter and he's effectively being a bit rude about that.
I think you get them both together and say that you did what you thought has right and now they need to try to get on with it. If there's any more fighting/complaining then the guilty party will have no access to his scooter for 24 hrs.

Rightshoardingsaurus · 09/01/2022 19:24

I'd give them an ultimatum. Stop bickering or both scooters go!

Rightshoardingsaurus · 09/01/2022 19:25

Also why did you not report the stolen/hijacked scooter?

CeleriacOfTheNight · 09/01/2022 19:26

Take the scooters, the wheels and whatever the hell else off them, and make it clear they can have them back when they agree to properly, and totally, stop the arguing.

Who needs this shit?

SparklyLeprechaun · 09/01/2022 19:27

Neither of them is right, the wheels are yours, since you bought ds1 a new scooter to replace the old one.

JackieCollinshasnoauthority · 09/01/2022 19:29

They're your wheels. They can complain when they get a job and pay for their own stuff.

also yes to reporting everything to police

RoyKentsChestHair · 09/01/2022 19:30

And when they can take care of their stuff and not lend it out to unscrupulous strangers who will take advantage of them. I’m always terrified when my DCs are out and about with expensive items. I know it’s not their fault that things get stolen, but mine have had it drummed into them that they don’t ever leave stuff unattended (even if locked up, after DS had a very expensive BMX stolen from city centre after locking it up SadAngry )

WorriedGiraffe · 09/01/2022 19:31

DS2 is right, why should your older son benefit from being robbed at your younger sons expense (who was also robbed). We’re are the police in all this? Are you just going to keep replacing expensive scooter parts for your ungrateful son forever?

SMabbutt · 09/01/2022 19:31

Tell them you don't care who has the 'old' wheels, but as you have paid for a new scooter / wheels to replace their stolen ones they owe you. You are therefore taking the old wheels as compensation for your expenses, qhich you are sure they will be happy with after you stepped in to help them out. You will be happy to sell them to whoever needs them as replacements in the future for a fair price. No argument allowed.

Thevoiceofreason2021 · 09/01/2022 19:31

You paid for them. They are yours.

Costacoffeeplease · 09/01/2022 19:33

Get rid of both. End of the hobby if they can’t sort it out themselves

TheAverageUser · 09/01/2022 19:33

They should stay with DS2 because you replaced DS1 when they were stolen. I'd also be telling them to stop moaning or I'd sell both.

Ponoka7 · 09/01/2022 19:33

They were stolen goods and as such they couldn't be legitimately sold or swapped. So they are DS1's.

mrmonkeyjocks · 09/01/2022 19:35

I think if DS1 wants them, he needs to give the wheels from the new scooter to DS2. That way he gets his old wheels back, but no one is left wheel-less!

StoneofDestiny · 09/01/2022 19:36

I'd get the police involved. This is blatant criminal activity and your son will be seen as an easy target if not stopped.

TheHamburgler · 09/01/2022 19:45

The wheels are DS1’s.

Cocomarine · 09/01/2022 19:50

Given that the wheels wear out quickly, I’d tell the pair of them to grow the fuck up, these wheels will be used soon enough.

AlDanvers · 09/01/2022 19:53

So many questions. I take it when ds1 noticed they were his wheels, you reported that to the police?

As a follow up to the original report when he had his bike stolen?

Why was it not insured?

And why is ds2 swopping wheels with people ge barely knows? How old are they?

And where is all this happening? In the street? If they have no chance of actually keeping their belongings, then it might be time to give it up. How long can you keep throwing money at this?

I do think, technically, they are ds1 wheels.

DanielRicciardosSmile · 09/01/2022 20:31

@mrmonkeyjocks

I think if DS1 wants them, he needs to give the wheels from the new scooter to DS2. That way he gets his old wheels back, but no one is left wheel-less!
This certainly struck me as the obvious solution when I read the OP. Unless I'm missing something, I can't see why DS1 would have two sets and DS2 zero.
sykadelic · 09/01/2022 20:39

DS1 owns the wheels. They're returning stolen property.

DS2 never owned the wheels, he was in receipt of stolen property. He has wheels now that he owns and the original owner had their stolen property returned to them.

If you take siblings out of it, and do cars instead of wheels... you wouldn't keep the car of a thief when they stole your car, you'd give it to police. Same thing.