Bmi!

[Kca29]

Not really an aibu so apologies. I'm a 5 foot 7 female who needs to lose some weight. I've put my weight and height into nhs bmi and I'm obese, I can try work on that.

But aibu to be really surprised at my 'ideal weight'.

My ideal according to nhs would be between 8 Stone 6 (I mean wtaf) and 11 Stone 5.

I'm never gonna be bloody 8 stone, likely not 11 Stone either. Dp is 11.5 Stone, 30 inch waist and small S clothes, he's very slim and not much taller than me. I'm never gonna weigh the same as him 😅

I was between 11.5-12 stone at age 19 pre kids and I was pretty slim, size 10. I never used to eat much to maintain that weight, used to obsess over calories and was obsessed with exercise. I don't want to be back to that obsessive stage again.

As mentioned above my dp fluctuates between 11.5-12 stone which is in the upper healthy range for a man of 5 foot 9/10. If he was a few pounds heavier he would be deemed overweight. Despite being in a men's size small, 30 inch waist and literally nothing on him 😅

So aibu to think sometimes ideal weight is a load of tosh and we all when different shapes and sizes.

I'm quite broad as well. Quite a 'solid' build rather than excess fat.

It's just disheartening that my ideal weight is probably never gonna be achievable!!

And of course to be clear - we also therefore see somewhat overweight people as ideal because our weight radar has been thrown out as a society.

As above I was a comfortable size 10 at 11.5-12 Stone

I'm 5'7" and weigh about 10 stone, and there is no way I can get into a size 10, so I'm struggling to believe that someone who weighs 1.5 stone more than me can.

@RampantIvy

As above I was a comfortable size 10 at 11.5-12 Stone

I'm 5'7" and weigh about 10 stone, and there is no way I can get into a size 10, so I'm struggling to believe that someone who weighs 1.5 stone more than me can.

I definitely was a size 10! A 12 would hang off me! I think I weigh more than I look. I think I'm quite solid around the legs which probably adds weight. I have quite slim but muscly legs... most of my fat is on stomach which isn't ideal!

I'm 5'8 and around 10 stone and wear size 8-10. I really, really don't think I'm a "real" 8 though, I think it's vanity sizing. In the 80s size 8 was seriously tiny, and I'm not definitely not that!

You can also look at waist to hip ratio and estimate your body fat percentage at a gym to get a more accurate picture of whether you’re at a healthy weight for your body.

I think I weigh more than I look

But that's why the healthy weight ranges are so vast. People with little muscle and small frames are likely to be a more comfortable healthy weight nearer the bottom of it; people with more muscle and larger frames towards the top end.

Thanks all. I've always had a bad relationship with weight and food etc. I was a slim child up until about age 8 but had a mother who was one minute binge eating then all of a sudden dieting and starving herself which wasn't a good influence. At 8 I started gaining weight and was always overweight throughout my teen years and my mother always told me if never get a boyfriend being fat, I was overweight until about 16 when I took matters into my own hands and lost weight but there's where my obsessive stage started. I then had Ds quite young and then dd a few years down the line. I lost weight with both of them during pregnancy due to severe sickness but gained it back afterwards. I have a wonderful Dp who I'm totally comfortable with. Just need to lose weight for health reasons. I just could never believe I'd be 8 Stone nor 11 stone. 11.5 Stone was my pre child weight what I considered slim and this has knocked my weight loss confidence knowing ill likely never be 11 Stone again after 2 babies, 2 c-sections and a skinny partner who can eat what he wants 😅

I'm 5ft2 and was so depressed to realise that a woman who is 5ft 10 could weigh a whole 3 stone heavier then me to have the same overweight BMI. That seems loads for a difference of 8 inches! What I wouldn't give for a few extra inches in height, I would be slim!

@AnneLovesGilbert

I agree that the “you’ve lost too much” when you’re a perfectly healthy weight comments are common and not always accurate.

Yep. I remember one of DH’s “friends” telling him he “looked like a cancer patient, wtf is wrong mate” when he was a healthy 12.5 stone at 6’1 after shifting some weight. “Friend” was very touchy about his own weight.

People say things like this when you look drastically different than what they're used to.

I think relying on clothes sizes is a dangerous game. I was overweight and unhealthy for years.. but convinced myself I wasn't fat as I was still a "size 12."

The truth was I was a size 12 in certain styles of clothes from certain shops. There's no way a size 12 pair of skinny tailored trousers from Topshop would've looked good on me. But I could bury my head in the sand on that front, gaily buy oversized T shirts and dresses and stretchy jeans in a 12, and pretend all was fine. Even better if I went in the likes of Fatface, where I'd be able to get away with a 10.

When you're overweight it's so easy to kid yourself it's fine and normal and BMI is rubbish anyway, and if you do 10,000 steps a day then you're fit, and a glass of wine a day is fine, and eating chocolate every day is what everyone does, and doesn't everyone eat a takeaway on a Friday and huge creamy coffees when they're out shopping and snacks in the evening. (Spoiler alert - they don't).

I do think that people can look unwell at a healthy weight when they are just not “meant” to be that weight. I have a friend who has always been overweight and when she went down to maybe BMI 21, she just didn’t look well. Pale and dark circles, dry skin etc. maybe it’s because she wasn’t eating properly. She is about 5 foot 11.
On the other hand, my bmi is 17.9 and I look completely healthy. I’m 5 foot 1 and do think height has something to do with it.

The ideal weight for you may well be quite a lot different to the ideal weight of someone else - hence the very large range.

I am 5'8" and at 8 stone 10 have a BMI of 18.5
I'm very lean - long limbed, bony and not a lot of body fat.
The top end of my BMI is 11 stone 11 and I can categorically say I would look terrible and be unhealthy. BMI is a guide.

Also if I lost another 1/2 stone I'd look too thin.

You keep saying 8 stone, when you're lower weight is 8 stone 6. At a low weight, those 6lb make quite a bit of difference.

I’m 5 ft 8. In January 2019 I was obese. I thought healthy bmi 11 stone 11 was so unrealistic. I started a healthy eating plan and was a healthy bmi by June - 6 months. I lost more after that to bmi 23. I’m a big frame size - big hands, size 8 feet that’s why bmi is a range. Bottom end bmi isn’t realistic for me but mid to top is. Just start take it a chunk at a time. If you get to bmi 26 etc and it’s not coming off and you are happy and healthy don’t get too hung up on it.
If you think it’s impossible, think bmi is load of rubbish you’ll never do it. Be positive. Im going to be healthier and feel better.
You probably looked ill before because you weren’t eating healthy food, had lost it quickly not eating. If you focus on healthy food with lots of protein and veg giving body nutrients it needs you’ll look well.

Checking my BMI and going from obese to just overweight was an important milestone for me. At my obese weight I was a size 12 in trousers and 14-16 in tops so it was easy to convince myself I was average.
I think it's important to take the obese definition on board and the lockdowns haven't done us any favours.

Post above mine shows how different we all are and why it’s a range. Same height but totally different body type. Only time I’ve dipped below 10 stone as an adult I had freshers flu and looked awful my size 8 dress I bought for Christmas ball was hanging off me. I’m a 10/12 at top end healthy bmi.

Why not aim for 10% of body weight first - there’s lots of health benefits if you are obese and can lose this then see where you are and how you are feeling.

I'm the same height as you but I have enormous feet and hands, generally a big frame. I lost a good bit of weight a couple of years ago and aimed for the top of the healthy bmi range. At 11st 6 I was a comfortable size 12 and happy with it.
Unfortunately I'm at the age where it becomes a matter of face or arse.
. At the lower end I suspect my face would collapse! . I opted for face and kept the arse.

Bmi doesent know how much is fat and how much is muscle. I’m 5ft9 and have been 9.5 stone, I was so ill I caught every bug going and felt like something was physically pulling me down. I was way too thin.. but according to bmi my ideal weight (lowest) could have been another half a stone lighter. Personally I’d say it’s a guide, you know your own body

Load of nonsense imo. I'm 5ft7 and I'm always between 8 stone and 8.4. I'v got really small bones so I'd be terribly unhealthy if I weighed at the top end of normal BMI unless it was all muscle. I'm a size 8 high street so not ridiculous small, just quite a light person.

BMI is bullshit if you're of the belief that it's all that matters, it's a guide and one of many things you should be looking at. 0

You can be thin and unhealthy and you can be overweight/obese and healthy. My weight could definitely do with some improvement, I'm under no illusions about that, but when you look at my blood pressure, HDL, LDL, TG, etc I'm "healthy"... much to my docs chagrin.

I care more about my appearance (for my own preference) and my endurance (for my son's) so I'm working on thinning out in my trunk area for sure, and in my face. I have never had a double-chin before... I can't say I'm a fan!

I thought that I looked gaunt when I finally lost weight last year, after being overweight / obese for the best part of 20 years. It was only because I wasn’t used to the look. I am now and I look normal, not gaunt.

I also thought for years that even the high end of BMI was unattainable, but it turns out it wasn’t. I agree with a pp though, waist to height ratio is possibly the more important measurement. Also look up the ABSI score, which combines BMI and waist size.

Totally irrelevant, but whenever I read ‘BMI’, I hear the Sex Pistols’ ‘EMI’ in my head.

@MessedOfTimes Oh bloody hell, I'm hearing it too now! You sod!

@Kca29 Say bollocks to BMI for the time being. It's clearly making weight loss seem like an unsurmountable task. Take one last look at the chart and find out the weight at which you will no longer be 'obese', just 'overweight'. Make that your first goal.

@RobertaFirmino I’m sorry 😩 It does certainly take the seriousness out of it for me though! 😂