Stuff is too hard to get rid of

[Clutterbusting]

I want to be free of my stuff. I’m drowning in it. My house is a mess and all that happens when I have a sort out is it gets moved about. I spend money on storage solutions when I need to just get rid.
I want to but where to? Charity shops are picky and I have A LOT to shift. Selling takes too long and I can’t be wasteful so a skip is out. What can I do?
AIBU to think this is just too hard?

I’m working my way through this at the moment. I’ve got a charity coming on Friday to pick up more stuff (clothes, shoes, books & more), they’ve already been here a few weeks ago to pick up a cupboard & other homewares. Where I live in Sydney our councils have free big rubbish removal, I get four of these a year. I’m trying hard to get there. Even with all I’ve gotten rid of it still seems I have heaps more to do.

Plus it’s quite hot here at the moment so it’s sweaty work!

Skip.

People will take stuff that they want.

You can wring your hands and drown in stuff.

Or you can be 'wasteful' and get a skip.
If you've bought it or acquired and all it's doing is sitting there not being used, it has already gone to waste.

You'll feel good once you make the decision and get started.

@Cocoabutterformula, you might be interested in Swedish Death Cleaning.

@NowEvenBetter

Charity shops were flooded with peoples crap in the last 2yrs, if no one wants it for free, dump your tat and stop buying more. Having four sheds laden with your shite is ridiculous, what are you doing?

Ugh you sound like someone I know. I highly doubt anyone wants to have four sheds filled with unwanted stuff. Hoarding is a recognised mental health condition. Is there any need to be so nasty?

I walked home from our local high st tonight. People have obviously been busy clearing out their houses over the new year because every charity shop doorway was stacked with bags. Every one of them was soaking wet and will have to go straight in a skip when they open on Tuesday. Cut out the middle man and pay for your own skip. Don't make a charity pay for your junk.

I've just finished sorting - out my hoarder mum's 4 bedroom house. The waste levels were obscene. I'm taking it as a life lesson and am now gradually clearing my own house. For the last 3 months I've adopted a one in, two out policy and the gradual reduction of stuff and increased space brings me so much joy.

I donated books, educational toys and games, dress up clothes and school uniform to my DC school. Years ago DM and I did a weekend of car boot sales and gave away what was left to a regular car booter so none of it came home. Kids clothes get handed down to DN’s. My parents live on a busy street so just put out items and a sign saying please take. Not much goes to the tip.

Try to give it away on fb marketplace or Lea it out with a free sign then If nobody wants it it isn’t wasteful to bin it. Stop keeping stuff you don’t want.

@TooMuchSugar22

Local fb pages get rid for free. I swear on ours you could roll a turd in glitter and someone would want it. People take absolutely anything if its free!

Use various charity shops?

This! Stick it on free cycle it will go, get a skip for the rest

Use a buying/selling app and give it all away? I’ve gotten rid of a lot of things quickly that way.

I see others have suggested this and I agree. People will take ANYTHING if it’s free!

Some charity places will come to you to collect If you have a lot of stuff. The key is to clean / sort / pack it all up.

I’m of a similar mind to you op.
A friend said that the free space in my home is worth more than the clutter.

Freecycle is a good way to get things gone without throwing them but if that doesn't work for you for some reason - Throw it.

I hear you about the waste aspect, but...the waste is having bought it in the first place. It isn't doing the environment or anyone else any good sat in your home and if you're not going to sell or donate it, throwing it out is a better, and less wasteful, solution than drowning in stuff.

Having too much stuff in your home makes you wasteful. You can't find things you actually need when you need them and you buy them again. The cost of maintaining a messy house is higher than maintaining a cleared one.

So hire a skip or just fill your bin each week. That's fine. The key to being environmentally sound is in not buying more. That is likely going to be the tricky part.

So set yourself a rule that you can't buy anything you don't have a space for and you can't buy anything on a whim. If you have a hobby that tends to accumulate stuff (reading, knitting, gardening, park run, whatever) Make a space for it (two bookshelves, a cupboard, half the shed, a drawer and corner of the garage, etc.) and once you've used that space in an organized way, you have to get rid of some stuff before you can get more. Also, if this is part of your downfall, don't accept tat of people that they don't want anymore.

Hi OP

Try this company; they will come to collect your stuff to sell on.

clickcollectclothes.co.uk/?gclid=Cj0KCQiAt8WOBhDbARIsANQLp97M66T_vY4pQ4y1H6KDVMhnerFREj7HMkm4jah_feEIaOEPDBWKC5MaAl0yEALw_wcB

Some charity places will come to you to collect If you have a lot of stuff. The key is to clean / sort / pack it all up.

When I cleared out my DM's house I phoned a charity and said they could take whatever they wanted. I had an old petrol can I didn't know what to do with, so I put it in a wardrobe and in another wardrobe I put the hoover so I could run it over when the stuff was gone. When I got to her flat after work they had taken everything - including the petrol can and hoover!!

Clothes in the recycling bin, there are loads around. Decent stuff will go to charity shops and everything weeks recycled where possible.

Toys and bric a brac. put it out on your driveway with a sign saying "free" and advertise on your local Facebook pages. Donate toys, craft stuff or stationery to a local preschool or playgroup. Alternatively sell them on Facebook marketplace but this will take longer.

Books or DVDs - sell using music magpie

I think it's less that you can't physically get rid of your things but more that you psychologically can't rid rid of your things. One reason people hoard is to kind of build a barrier or protective layer around themselves to block out some kind of trauma or grief.

I think a better first step would be to consider counseling to understand why you hoard.

We moved house because we couldn't fit all our crap in. We said we would be strict about what we were keeping and would keep on top of what we brought into the house and sheds.
The new house is a million times worse than the old one because we don't have a loft yet. All the spare rooms are full of crap we haven't even unpacked.
I honestly think we have a serious problem. We say we will get there one day and it will be solved, but I can't see that happening any time soon.

I intend to tackle more of it when I'm on maternity leave. The house needs renovating so when we eventually order a skip to ditch the old fittings I want to be ready to Chuck other hoarded crap in there too.

There's a local charity near me that helps families with clothes and household goods. A referral is needed in the same way as a Foodbank one & they regularly ask for donations. Check your local citizens advice, health team, churches or community hubs for details.

They help people with clothes and furniture esp if they're setting up house again after fleeing domestic abuse.

British heart foundation collect unwanted furniture. Contact charities and refuges who work with the homeless and abuse victims.

Get a skip. And when you've skipped all your stuff you really must commit, and mean it, to not acquiring any more stuff.

It's no less wasteful if it's sitting in your house but of bo use to you.

You could sell on eBay / Vinted.

Give some items to charity.

Do you have a Facebook group where you live? We have one for people to offer free items they don't want.

Throw the rest away.

Give it away or charge very little for it by the box/sackful on facebook marketplace. Lots of people will buy bulk stuff and sift it for the good bits to sell on. Group together similar items (women's clothes, men's clothes, kids' clothes by age, toys by age, kitchen bits, books etc) and take photos of the pile. Hide some of the crappier bits in with the good bits so they have to take the lot, all or nothing. But charge very little.

Aim to fill a bag or a box a day, more if you can manage it.

Designate one room or the garage if you have space, to store stuff until you are in a position to sort it into categories for selling or donating.

Some of it you will just have to take to the tip, obviously. If there is tons of it then pay for one of those Hippo sacks or a mobile collection service. It'll cost a couple of hundred quid but it will be SO worth it.

The thing is OP, the waste has happened. It's done, it's in your home and mind. So the choice is to keep it around your proverbial neck or be free of it.

I live somewhere with a lot of foot traffic so in your shoes I'd put stuff on the street, with a sign like "Free- boys' clothes age 8-9" or whatever (or "8-12"... don't get mired into sorting too much). And perhaps a Facebook post on a local group. Repeat weekly. Target one area of your home at a time. Also make a list of where various things can go, ie clothes to clothes bank at x location, toys to y playgroup etc, so you're clear on a destination for each item. If needed I echo others about a professional declutterer.

Massive sympathies - I have three young kids and I can see the stuff piling up in front of my eyes even as I try to get rid. I get a lot of things 2nd hand / handed down, which makes it easier to pass on in turn, but still - things like my old workwear when I haven't worked in the City for eight years, which I look at and think "But I remember wearing that! And it's from Hobbs!". Etc . I feel like our home should be big enough for us, but it isn't because we have too much stuff.

I think you're thinking of this as a practical task and overlooking the emotional task. What does all this stuff mean to you? What does it do for you? What are you afraid might happen without it?

I'm sure there are books to help you through this stuff but a few sessions with a counsellor might help too. We keep things to make us feel safe and protect against loss.

Unless you get to the root of the issue, even if you get rid of it all, the same need will make you accumulate it all again.