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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Term Time Only vs Part time?

87 replies

neverbeenskiing · 02/01/2022 10:59

I have 2 DC, one in nursery and one at primary school. I WOH full time, term-time only in a job that I'm passionate about but is stressful and can be emotionally draining. DH also works FT. He is the higher earner, manages a large number of people and has to travel quite a bit. He does his fair share of housework and is brilliant with the DC when he's here but he works long hours and we feel like ships that pass in the night sometimes. I'm exhausted and constantly feel like I'm spinning plates.

It's lovely having the school holidays off but during term-time my job is all consuming and I feel like I have very little left to give for DC and DH at the end of the day. Working full time, term time only also means I never have any time to myself. I'm either at work or looking after the kids. I have struggled with my MH on and off the past couple of years and I know I'm supposed to practice 'self care' but the constant demands of juggling parenting and work (not to mention trying to keep on top of housework, elderly relatives who need help, one or both DC picking up various illnesses or having to isolate every other week) always get in the way.

I've been seen a job advertised that I could do from home, 3 days a week. The salary is lower on paper but because I don't currently get paid for school holidays my take-home pay would be roughly the same. It's less responsibility than my current role but is in a related field, looks interesting and would still allow me to 'make a difference'. There would be opportunity for progression down the road if I wanted that when the kids are older and life (hopefully!) feels less hectic. I told a couple of friends I was considering applying as I was feeling quite excited about it, but they told me that I would be crazy to give up a term time only job. They said TTO is "the holy grail" when you've got DC and I'd definitely regret it. Their advice was to try to stick it out in my current job as it's only so tough now because the kids are young and when they're older I'll be glad I did. Now I'm having second thoughts.

WWYD?

OP posts:

Frazzledfiona · 02/01/2022 11:01

I would also say that term time only is the holy grail. Kids have 13 weeks school holidays, and if they are young, what will you do with them on the 3 days your working?

Coldilox · 02/01/2022 11:02

Can you afford the childcare for the three days a week in school holidays?

Whinge · 02/01/2022 11:03

The salary is lower on paper but because I don't currently get paid for school holidays my take-home pay would be roughly the same

My first thought was have you taken into account paying for holiday care. You might find yourself worse off if you have to pay out for holiday clubs.

roseberrycherry · 02/01/2022 11:06

Term time only! I've literally just swapped my part time job for term time. The holiday clubs are expensive! Will you need wrap around care while the children are in school? All these really do add up. Please think very carefully about giving up your term time job, they are like gold dust!

LanaDelBoy · 02/01/2022 11:07

Presumably working TTO you still have annual leave you can use for yourself?
Whereas P/T you need to use most of your annual leave for holiday childcare.

But then you have fewer working days in term time.
I guess it depends how you want to sort out child care.

hopingforabrighterfuture2021 · 02/01/2022 11:08

Term time only is amazing. I wouldn’t swap my job for a non TTO job for anything!

Fuzzywuzzyface · 02/01/2022 11:09

I have been doing a TTO job for just over a year. DS is 15 and I had previously worked 3 days per week. Like you my TTO job is pretty full on and I need that holiday time every 6 weeks!
I underestimated how little time I would have during the week and I am lucky that DP is able to prepare the evening meal and keep the house reasonably tidy. DS has various sporting activities and DP can facilitate this - I certainly couldn't now!
3 days a week was great as I didnt have to do any house stuff at weekends, I was able to catch up with friends during the day for lunch etc.
You just need to know you have childcare in place during the holidays and will you be able to work in place when the children are not in school.
I recommend 3 days a week especially as you have other commitments which can only increase.

Badabingbadatinselbum · 02/01/2022 11:09

If you can sort childcare for three days a week in the holidays (holiday club and some leave) then I would absolutely go for it. Term time working is the holy grail - on paper. I assume you have worked when you are too ill too but justify doing it because you have all school holidays off, panic when dc are ill and you might need to take time off... you have the opportunity to go for a job three days a week in a field you know with pretty much the same pay? Do it! Do it now!

ItsSnowJokes · 02/01/2022 11:10

I have done both. I was TTO then got made redundant and I'm now part time. I am desperately looking for another TTO job as holiday care is a nightmare. My PT role is great for me as its school hours so I drop off and pick up everyday (where as it was before and after school clubs before) but the holidays are tough. We have to take separate annual leave to cover some of the holidays, and then still pay for holiday clubs for the days I am working (I condense my hours during school holidays so I need 3 full time days of care).

At least with TTO you know it is no more than 7 weeks till you get some time off!

Jensonfromtheblock · 02/01/2022 11:10

@LanaDelBoy

Presumably working TTO you still have annual leave you can use for yourself? Whereas P/T you need to use most of your annual leave for holiday childcare.

But then you have fewer working days in term time.
I guess it depends how you want to sort out child care.

If you only work term time you don’t get annual leave as you get all the school holidays as leave. So you can’t just book a day off ever, unless it’s an emergency.

Blueflowersinthesnow · 02/01/2022 11:11

I totally get where you're coming from OP because DH and I both work in stressful roles and booking the odd day of annual leave when both kids are at school/nursery is the only thing which keeps me sane!

We cover school holidays by staggering our annual leave, using a small amount of unpaid parental leave and occasionally a week at holiday club, it works out ok.

Personally term time only wouldn't be for me because of the reasons you've stated, I think a proper part time role is the holy grain personally (2-3 days a week rather than 5 days work for 4 days pay which is what most people seem to do).

Bagamoyo1 · 02/01/2022 11:12

Could you reduce your current hours?

Personally I wouldn’t give up a TTO job when the kids are young.

Qwertykeys · 02/01/2022 11:17

LanaDelBoy

Presumably working TTO you still have annual leave you can use for yourself?

No if you work TTO you can’t book leave , the pay is pro rata in your salary .

delilabell · 02/01/2022 11:17

If its in a school environmentbthe only time you have off in tto is the holidays. You don't get tto AND holidays

Phineyj · 02/01/2022 11:19

If you think you can get affordable holiday cover then I think there's an argument for the 3 days a week job. I teach and am in a similar situation with 2-3 months of intensive work then school holidays off. Yes the holidays are nice, but my DD struggles with the alternating seeing lots of me and then hardly any. I also end up booking holiday childcare at least now and again so I can get admin and marking done and get to the gym etc.

Make a list of pros and cons and don't forget your own needs and wants.

People saying term time only is the holy grail may not have tried doing it 6am to 10pm plus a chunk of the weekends. I'm 10 years in...

RomainingCalm · 02/01/2022 11:19

If you can sort out the childcare for school holidays then I would definitely consider part time rather than TTO. In my experience the holiday care is manageable but you have to be prepared to throw money at it.

A couple of days in the week to get jobs done and have some time to look after yourself sounds like a great option freeing you (and presumably DH) up to do family stuff at weekends. It also hopefully gives you some flexibility for school events, sports days, assemblies, appointments etc.

Just check whether you will have some regular contact with other colleagues if it is 3x days WFH - it can feel quite lonely as a newbie if you have never physically met anyone in the team.

Pericombobulations · 02/01/2022 11:23

I went Term Time only after part time and never regretted it. Yes the term time is more stressful but the longer downtimes make up for it.

Be warned, the summer clubs I could find made me sign up for full weeks so DS was going for 5 full days when I didnt need he to. We saved a significant amount when he stopped going.

Now I dont need to worry about summer clubs, I have continued my term time, but I just prefer it to part time.

notanothertakeaway · 02/01/2022 11:25

If you worked 3 days per week at home, who would look after children in school holidays? And it's really difficult for children to understand / tolerate you being at home but not available. Even my teenagers struggle with that at times

gingerbiscuits · 02/01/2022 11:31

Forget your friends - do what's best for you & your family NOW - who knows what's round the corner? The Pandemic has taught a lot of us to live for the moment, protect our MH & treasure family time. 3 days per week from home with no major salary drop sounds amazing! You can juggle school drop offs, pick ups etc & sort some after school activities/wraparound care to help you out as & where needed. The difference to your stress levels & 'time back' will be huge. Go for it!

Original poster

neverbeenskiing · 02/01/2022 11:31

Thank you all for your responses so far. I will try to answer some of the questions.

No, I can't book any annual leave in my current role unfortunately. It's a TTO contract so I can only take leave in school holidays. I couldn't even get one days unpaid leave to go to my best friend's wedding in term time.

There is no possibility of reducing my hours in my current role. The job cannot be done part time and wouldn't lend itself well to a job share. Also no possibility of DH reducing his hours.

I should have said in my OP, sorry, My DP's have said they would be more than happy to have the kids 3 days a week in the holidays. They are very involved GP's and love having them. DH and I would also take annual leave obviously and I would probably look into holiday clubs for eldest for a week or two over the summer anyway as she gets bored easily and would really enjoy a dance/sports based one.

Wrap around care wouldn't be an additional cost as I'm currently out of the house from 7am to 5.30/6pm during term time anyway.

OP posts:

HPandTheNeverEndingBedtime · 02/01/2022 11:32

I would stick to TTO until DC are older and don't need holiday childcare, but maybe see if you can go down to 4 days.

With the economy and job market how it is I wouldn't want to be putting myself in the situation of being easily dismissed because I have less than 2 years experience with a company.

I teach so out of the house 8-4:30 pm, run Dd to her activities, home, dinner then homework for her and marking/planning for me. It's relentless termtime and then I work a few days in the holidays, but we do get a proper break in the longer ones and that's good whereas 28 days spread throughout a year really doesn't seem like alot.

LadyCleathStuart · 02/01/2022 11:33

Oh I'm currently having this same dilemma only the opposite way. I think term time is swinging it for me (although it will be part term time but still better than nothing).

gingerbiscuits · 02/01/2022 11:35

@neverbeenskiing

Thank you all for your responses so far. I will try to answer some of the questions.

There is no possibility of reducing my hours in my current role. The job cannot be done part time and wouldn't lend itself well to a job share. Also no possibility of DH reducing his hours.

Wrap around care wouldn't be an additional cost as I'm currently out of the house from 7am to 5.30/6pm during term time anyway.

DEFINITELY go for it then! It's a no brainer!!

Whinge · 02/01/2022 11:39

I should have said in my OP, sorry, My DP's have said they would be more than happy to have the kids 3 days a week in the holidays.

That's very kind of them, but seems a very big commitment and I would worry about making a decision that relied on grandparents to make it viable.

Excitedforthefuture · 02/01/2022 11:40

Part time all the way.
Hands down.

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