Off-lead dog running over to my on-lead dog, other owner responds aggressively

[yellowleaves123]

For some reason I can't shake this so coming to AIBU.

I took my dog for a gentle walk this afternoon. He is recovering from an injury so was on a long-lead, to prevent him running but also so that I could communicate to other people that he doesn't want to say hi to their dogs today (I reel some lead in for this - it's not an annoying flexilead, it is a highly visible bright lead that you can't miss at all). This is what I did with other dogs I saw, whose owners respected this and didn't let their dogs approach.

We were in an empty field so he had a bit of lead with freedom to move around and sniff but could be shortened. Part of it got tangled in a branch that had been blown over so I was untangling it. As I did, an off-lead dog appeared out of nowhere and charged towards my dog. He was a few metres away from me as I was reeling his line in and it was stuck on a branch. I called to the owner "he is recovering from injury so is on-lead and won't want to say hello to yours". The man smiled and did nothing. After five seconds or so of looking super uncomfortable with a dog sniffing his face (which most dogs don't like anyway let alone when in pain), my dog asked the other dog to move. It didn't, so he chased it away (out of character behaviour because he is injured). He made a bit of noise whilst doing so but didn't make any contact - he wouldn't. By chase away, I mean he ran the couple of metres of his lead he had back to me and the dog happened to run alongside him.

The guy then shouts "FOR F* SAKE". I asked why he let his dog run up to on-lead dogs (there was another on-lead dog with me and a friend, that one was fine but is nervous so isn't let off), and he said "this is a woodland, your dog shouldn't do that". I told him that I have as much entitlement to walk my dog as he does his, and mine was on-lead, his shouldn't have approached or he should have recalled it.

He made a big scene of checking his dog over (fine to do - I witnessed the whole thing happen and my dog didn't touch his but did make some noise, as dogs do when communicating) and went on without saying anything. I did note that he put his dog on a lead afterwards. For some reason I can't stop thinking about it - I think because it's a normal walking spot for me and I don't want people to get the wrong idea about my dog. This was out of character for him due to recovering from an injury, and because his lead was around a big branch it was tight. My dog is generally comfortable with small dogs (which this was), doesn't like GSDs so we just avoid them.

I think I'm just a bit more flustered as the man got aggressive, usually people acknowledge that the other dog was on a lead.

YABU - you're in the wrong and should have apologised
YANBU - the man should have recalled his dog when you said yours was injured and on-lead, and not blamed you

I should add I work with dogs professionally so in terms of reading the incident etc I know that my dog did nothing but make a bit of noise to clear the other dog off. Feeling extra touchy over the last few days...aunt flo is due.

Both of you were in the wrong as neither of you were in control of your dog.

You seem to make a lot of excuses for you and your dog. Maybe he had some too.

@Piggy42

I think he was entirely in the wrong. Out of interest, I had this conversation with a friend. If an off lead dog comes over to his fear-aggressive, on the lead dog, which bites, presumably it’s not his fault as his dog is on the lead?

If it is aggressive and a biter then it needs to be muzzled as well. Even if it is on lead, it would still be his fault if it bit another dog or person. He needs to be in control of it entirely, which means muzzled.

Maybe he didn't/couldn't hearyou at first. Long lines are a pain for getting tangled, maybe keep it a bit shorter from now on, so you could reel it back in more easily if an unexpected off lead dog bounds up again. Its horrible when it happens, but you can be better prepared now you've had the unpleasant experience.

Yes, it's very frustrating. I'd never let DDog approach a dog on a lead, and I don't even let her free approach off-lead dogs unless we know them or I'm comfortable with the body language. There is no need for dogs to 'say hello' to each other every time:

If you can't recall your dog when needed then they are not safe to be off lead when you may run in to other people. It's as simple as that.

I got mightily sick of people letting their 'friendly' dogs bounce all over my elderly deaf spaniel (who wore a high vis jacket saying she was deaf and old) on her lead. In the end I started grabbing collars and physically holding them away until a sheepish owner appeared, but I shouldn't have had to. It's just lazy, bad ownership.

2 big Alaskan Malamutes here, always on the lead unless in closed off area. One is very reactive to dogs bounding up to it out of control. The worst are the yappy terriers that bark, snap and run round my dogs.

Then the owners of said uncontrolled dogs get angry if their dog gets bitten 🤷‍♂️.im not going to make allowances for other people's lack of responsibility or recall. I wear a camera to protect my dogs from such eventualities.

@chandellina

You are both being unreasonable but it sounds like both the dogs are just fine. If your dog is in danger of injury from other dogs you shouldn't take it out, or be certain there won't be any surprises in its day. Presumably a cat or squirrel could have caused harm too? I would be peeved to be told off for my off lead dog going up to a dog on a lead, like that's a crime. I think many dog owners are really unrealistic about the animal nature of the animals they love.

What? Of course it's not unrealistic to be able to train your dog not to run up to other dogs and come back when called, and if you really can't be bothered for some reason then keep it on a lead in public!

I have a dog reactive rescue. He wears a bright yellow harness that says no dogs, a lead that says no dogs.
Im seeing more and more the sheer selfishness of people walking their dog. Its like the 30 seconds it takes to reel their dog in to pass mine is too much for them. And even then the dogs are usually badly trained with zero recall. I had one person tell me she would like my dog to teach her dog some manners.... no you get off your arse and do that.
I suspect its something to do with lockdown puppies driving this issue.

YANBU and the sheer entitlement is pissing me off.

This winds me up so much! Our dog is super friendly, no aggression whatsoever, but I always put her on the lead if I see another dog on a lead.

I once had her on the lead while I was chatting to someone and another dog came charging up to her and started growling and snapping at her. The owner shouted at me saying it was my fault for having a small dog!!! Wtaf????

The other man was irresponsible, I'll mannered and a bit of a twat.

I hope your dog's paw gets better soon.

If you're someone who lets your off-lead dog approach on-lead dogs without checking whether it's safe to do so first, then you're a a very poor advocate for your own dog's safety. I'd never let DDog do this for reasons for her own safety, not just that of the other dog's. It's stupid and reckless and not the mark of a responsible owner. Of course accidents happen, but if they are happening frequently to you then you might want to consider whether your dog is adequately trained to be off-lead in the first place or go places where there is nobody about:

YANBU at all. The moment he heard “and won't want to say hello to yours" he should have recalled his dog. My dog is off lead in the park & as a responsible owner I check body language of dog & owner & recall if necessary. Not usually necessary though as my dog is pretty good at reading dog body language & just stops if he’s not sure, at which point I pop him on lead.

He probably knew he was in the wrong, then when your dog gave his a fright, he reacted (like so many people do when on the defensive) with aggression.

Not a nice experience for you, but you deffo weren’t in the wrong.

The guy was just a bird brained,ill mannered numpty, who can't weigh up situations with owners and their dogs, and who would always blame others, if anything was amiss in a dog type situation. There are a lot of people with dogs, who take a high handed stance in what they do, when out with a dog.

Bloke is a twat and has hopefully learned a lesson. A friend of mine has (harmless) spray for such situations and sprays dogs which run up to her on lead dog. 😁

I think the correct doggie etiquette is to put your dog on a lead whenever you see another dog on a lead unless you can reliably call your dog to heel. People have their dogs on leads in places where they could run free for all sorts of reasons, allowing an off lead dog to approach an on lead dog is not good dog ownership.

If I was worried about my dog injuring itself I would not use a long lead so that I could be sure I had absolute and immediate control, yours got tangled up which is why you were unable to intervene to stop the other dog approaching. You might have informed the owner your dog was recovering from an injury but you didn't ask him to call his dog off, you said he wouldn't be up for saying hello which I think is open to interpretation (particularly to a certain type of owner) and you don't know if he actually heard you. I think it's best not to try to sound polite when you want to give a clear instruction.

Your dog did nothing wrong, he basically told a rather rude dog to piss off which is entirely normal dog behaviour but I don't understand why you didn't either call your dog to you or walk away when you noticed he was uncomfortable with the other dogs greeting. You say you work with dogs professionally so this can't be he first time you've met an arsehole owner, shit happens, both dogs are OK so let it go.

YANBU at all, OP. Often, people who walk their dogs off-lead don’t seem to realise that dogs that are on-lead are normally on them for a reason, hence they don’t understand that for some dogs (E.g. sight hounds, who rely on their speed and have low recall response) being on a lead unable to quickly run away from the in-lead dog, can turn their fear into barking = aggression, which could cause a fight.
We can’t let ours off unless in completely car-free spaces for this reason

I walk one dog on the lead because he is way too friendly and will jump up at people and has not the best recall. My other dog is perfect off lead. The vast majority will see the lead and either put their dog on or call them away (generally assuming my dog may be aggressive I guess). But every once in a while someone will let their dog race over. As it happens this isn't a problem as my dog is very friendly, but it would be extremely annoying if not. And it usually is a man who is the owner.
You can get jackets that say your dog is nervous or whatever- might be worth it?

This is precisely why l won' t get another dog.
Dog walking has become way too complicated ,and takes all the fun out of it, when l was young we always walked our dogs miles off lead, never an issue, now totally different story, most dog owners look utterly miserable or very anxious when out walking their dog, and l am sure their dog picks up on it. You are now treated like a criminal for allowing your dog off lead, even if dog is elderly lurcher zero interest in other dogs or humans.

Our pup is only allowed to be off lead when no other dogs are around as he has a habit of running up to dogs. The second I see another dog, i put his lead on. It is so frustrating when off lead dogs run up to us when it's very clear I'm trying to avoid interactions.

DH had this once with a pair of absolute dickheads...Still makes me angry years on and DDog is sadly now gone. He was in woodland where dogs MUST be on a lead as there are ground nesting birds. Along come the dickheads with three massive dogs all off and yards ahead of them and they proceed to attack our on lead lurcher. DH let her go so she could leg it...she could outrun most dogs being mainly greyhound and he couldn't fend off three dogs. Dickheads plod over feebly calling the dogs, no apology. DH was raging and asked what the fuck they were doing. All they could say was I'm sure she will come back like dopey twats. She actually ran the 3 miles home to me and I found her outside with bleeding pads and shaking like a leaf. Sadly some people are just absolute entitled knobs, YWNBU at all. Hopefully as he put his dog on a lead afterwards he has learned a lesson. Our other lurcher is great off the lead and the friendliest dope ever and I still wouldn't assume it was ok for her to approach until I checked.

Having a dog on a lead doesn't absolve you of any responsibility.

If the dog is potentially aggressive and a lead long enough that the dog ends up metres away, you are not in a position to control your dog and this is just about as irresponsible as having a non aggressive dog off the lead.

This drives me mad. I have a collie who is unpredictable with other dogs. I very obviously put her on a lead whenever we see anyone. But most people don't recriprocate and let their dog wander up to her-- even even im clearly putting her behind my leg to keep them apart. Then if she has a go they seem put out with me!

Sometimes I say 'my collie isnt friendly so you might want to put your dog on a lead' and they always look so surprised.

It baffles and annoys me tbh.

Ah, similar happened to me today. Unusual experience.
Other dog just wanted to play, but my walkee was Not Happy.

Problem is that dog I walk is not mine -- if she were mine, she'd probably be muzzled. That would stop her eating random crap & snapping at others. Oh well, no harm done in our case. My walkee is small so I could pull her back.

I think you might be overthinking this, OP... if ppl learn your dog's reputation that isn't all bad, either. I now 'know' many dogs we encounter, and how they'll react. It's worth knowing.

Or they say 'my dog is fine'. Well my dog isnt, as clearly demonstrated by putting her on a lead and putting my leg between both dogs. MY GOD. People are so self-centric in their thinking that they can't consider beyond the fact that they think their dog is friendly.

Sorry mini rant!

The guy definitely heard me as he said something along the lines of "mines friendly" when I said he won't want to say hi as he is injured.

Both of you were in the wrong as neither of you were in control of your dog.

Mine was on a lead and his was not, I believe a lead constitutes control. He may have had a few metres but he was on a lead.

if your dog is in danger of injury from other dogs you shouldn't take it out, or be certain there won't be any surprises in its day. Presumably a cat or squirrel could have caused harm too? I would be peeved to be told off for my off lead dog going up to a dog on a lead, like that's a crime. I think many dog owners are really unrealistic about the animal nature of the animals they love.

Do you know 35% of dogs over 1 have a chronic, painful illness? So by your logic these dogs should never go out so that your dog can say hi to who he wants? Why do you feel your dog should be able to greet any dog?

I would walk your dog on a short lead if he’s injured/not good with other dogs. Long lines cause so many problems, the other guy may not have heard you and thought you’re dog was off lead. I’ve seen so many problems where people and dogs have got tangled up in them. Other guy had no excuse to be aggressive though, that’s not fair.

He’s wrong. It does my head in, my dog has red Collar ‘leave me alone’ doesn’t like other dogs. Got bit by a wee dog who was off lead right on his face and goes mental when dogs get too close. He’s on a super strong lead , short, with extra harness to hold him. He’s noisy, but can’t go anywhere. Other dogs owner wasn’t happy that my dog was creating a fuss and being noisy. Some people are just arseholes thru and thru. One day someone with a short temper and an angry dog will deal with them!