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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Smoking in pubs, free speech, having a laugh

297 replies

Wannalivewithcommonpeople · 31/12/2021 13:32

Aibu to miss all this? The relaxed, laid back FUN of the 90’s to maybe maybe late 2010
ish?
I don’t smoke or take drugs anymore, hell I haven’t been able to drink in 21 months, due to long covid, but sat here watching 90’s & 2000’s music videos whilst Dh takes toddler out and thinking of the past.
Aibu to just bloody miss the simplicity and fun and to hate these times?

OP posts:
Hospedia · 31/12/2021 13:48

Yeah, of course. We miss that. You've hit the nail on the head...

What is it you want to say that you feel was acceptable in the 90s/00s but is now censored?

Mayorquimby2 · 31/12/2021 13:49

Ah no. They haven't gotten rid of free speech have they? That's really not on. That was my favourite type of speech and all.

BusterGonad · 31/12/2021 13:50

In my many years of going to night clubs, I have not once seen anyone have their clothes set on fire by a cigarette. 😂

Omicrone · 31/12/2021 13:50

@Lacedwithgrace

We can all speak freely, it's just that we don't tolerate people being assholes anymore which clearly you're upset about.
Yeah, but everyone's definition of 'being an asshole' will be different.

What this is all coming to mean is that 'We don't tolerate people with different opinions to our own anymore'.

WeatherwaxOn · 31/12/2021 13:50

I'm at risk of developing lung cancer as I grew up in a household where my father and grandfather smoked. Visiting relatives smoked. I hate smoking and don't wish to inhale other people's toxins.

If what you want to say might offend people, it could be that it actually IS offensive? I haven't felt a need to modify my views or humour.

Carrying a mobile phone is not compulsory.

YANBU to want to have a relaxed time with friends but YABU to conflate societal norms (through rose tinted glasses) with the core elements of that fun.

MelonTits · 31/12/2021 13:50

@Mayorquimby2

Ah no. They haven't gotten rid of free speech have they? That's really not on. That was my favourite type of speech and all.
😂
Bluebluemoon · 31/12/2021 13:51

I know OP. Do the youth of today even dance in clubs/pubs any more? My own dc's don't but I don't know whether that's because of where they live, compared to where I grew up.

I feel like they're just content being on their phones/interacting through headsets etc rather than actual face to face human contact.

SNUG2022 · 31/12/2021 13:52

Smoking in pubs was fucking great. The 90s were the best. Menthol fags, pint of lager, friends, jukebox on. I'd go back in a heartbeat.

Obviously this is not me now, but it was definitely me then.

Eleganz · 31/12/2021 13:53

@BusterGonad

In my many years of going to night clubs, I have not once seen anyone have their clothes set on fire by a cigarette. 😂
You haven't lived! I once saw someone empty a lighter on someone else and set them on fire with a cigarette. They weren't dancing at the time though. Those were the days! (Not).
BusterGonad · 31/12/2021 13:55

I clearly haven't. 😂

CeleriacOfTheNight · 31/12/2021 13:55

@BusterGonad

In my many years of going to night clubs, I have not once seen anyone have their clothes set on fire by a cigarette. 😂
Me neither, but I saw many a over-hairsprayed fringe lost to the cause 😂
thickthighs73 · 31/12/2021 13:55

@BusterGonad

In my many years of going to night clubs, I have not once seen anyone have their clothes set on fire by a cigarette. 😂
Given the amount of hairspray we used to use it’s amazing we didn’t go up in flames Grin
Kite22 · 31/12/2021 13:56

YABU to miss smoking in pubs.

I still think how nice it is to not smell of smoke when I've been out somewhere, all these years since it stopped.

However, I do miss a nice pub where we could all just gather for a drink and a chat and laugh, or discuss anything, yes. I know they do still exist - but sadly not any local to me

Eleganz · 31/12/2021 13:56

@Bluebluemoon

I know OP. Do the youth of today even dance in clubs/pubs any more? My own dc's don't but I don't know whether that's because of where they live, compared to where I grew up.

I feel like they're just content being on their phones/interacting through headsets etc rather than actual face to face human contact.

Pandemic aside, of course they do. Who do you think keeps all these clubs and pubs afloat? Hordes of 40 something parents dragging themselves into town after bath and bedtime stories?
PinkTonic · 31/12/2021 13:56

@Lacedwithgrace

We can all speak freely, it's just that we don't tolerate people being assholes anymore which clearly you're upset about.
Oh I dunno, I read MN and see massively obnoxious arseholes all over it.
Nonnymum · 31/12/2021 13:56

I certainly wouldn't want to go back to a time when smoking in pubs and restaurants was allowed. It was terrible for non smokers who came out smelling of smoke. Also wouldn't want to go back to a time when seat belts were not compulsory or when it was legal to drunk and drive. I am all for health and safety rules.
But I agree these times are terrible but not because we have to think about other people's comfort and safety as well as our own enjoyment

BusterGonad · 31/12/2021 13:57

I did poke my brother in the face with a cigarette once by mistake, he moved at the wrong time. He didn't particularly mind.

LongDarkTeatime · 31/12/2021 13:58

I wonder if some of these changes represent a move from ‘I have rights’ to ‘we have responsibilities’

I have yet to hear any current anti-mask people refer to their responsibilities.

Original poster
Wannalivewithcommonpeople · 31/12/2021 13:59

@Omicrone That’s it

OP posts:
Eleganz · 31/12/2021 14:00

@LongDarkTeatime

I wonder if some of these changes represent a move from ‘I have rights’ to ‘we have responsibilities’

I have yet to hear any current anti-mask people refer to their responsibilities.

I'm not so sure we've moved in that direction. I highly doubt we'd get a government to ban smoking in pubs in the current political climate if it was still a thing.
Toadsinholes · 31/12/2021 14:00

Op I know exactly what you mean. Simpler times! I think it’s the phones that have been the problem - everyone constantly photographing themselves, filters, false ideas of beauty etc etc. everything was much more simple! You went out, got hammered with your friends, threw up on the way home, no-one cared, no-one took photos… good times. Also music was great, everyone watching/listening to the same thing was a good bonding experience.

I’ve also never seen anyone have their clothes set fire from a cigarette 🤣🤣

Original poster
Wannalivewithcommonpeople · 31/12/2021 14:01

@BusterGonad Exactly 😫I didn’t mean anything offensive at all and don’t say anything offensive

OP posts:
Narutocrazyfox · 31/12/2021 14:01

I'm with you, OP!

I'm not ashamed to say I loved smoking in pubs, popping in on the way home from work and seeing who was about... It didn't matter who was there but someone always was! We'd have a few beers and set the world to rights. I sigh over those carefree days sometimes - things were so much easier then! (for context I was a teen in the late 80s early 90s) x

WhoAre · 31/12/2021 14:02

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

SNUG2022 · 31/12/2021 14:02

You're right though. You wouldn't be cancelled for having the 'wrong' thoughts.

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