To ask what the psychology is behind virtue signalling?

[chrisevans]

Is it a low self esteem thing?

Is it that the person is actually a good person but likes recognition?

Is it trying to be inspiring to others?

I know people get annoyed by it, the whole I just donated ..... announcements but what is it about the donator that they are trying to achieve or what is the psychology behind it?

Personally you carry on telling us about your good deeds and good for you, but I am interested to know thoughts on the above.

@Goldenhedgehogs

I am interested in this also, as a lapsed at times quite evangelical Christian growing up it was definitely emphasised you should not gloat or publicise about doing a good deed as it wouldn’t count in heaven because you had already got the reward of recognition of a good deed on earth. I am now more out the other side of believing angels come down to secret shopper test you that are treating the homeless or needy as Jesus but not making a big deal about it. So I kind of wonder if the early church founders were also just as pissed off with all the boastful do gooders and that’s why they taught this.

I'm not an evangleical, I'm a Catholic revert but I'd say you're right and it would come from the Parable of the Pharisee and the Sinner in the Temple. Jesus told the story of the Pharisee standing at the front boasting about all his " good" deeds and the man standing at the back, quietly asking God to forgive him his sins. Modern-day "virtue signallers", who like to publicise how wonderful they are and how they have the "correct" (read woke) opinions are like that Pharisee in my view! Truly kind-hearted people just do good without making a fuss about it and often the causes are not fashionable ones. I suspect the best of people like to keep it quiet altogether, as they see themselves as just flawed human beings. Which we all are, of course. P.S. I had the laugh at the idea of "secret shoppers" watching us, hehe!

You sure can tell who the virtue signallers are on this thread. The ones who are getting all huffy and sniffy at virtue signallers being badmouthed.

Great thread @chrisevans and I totally agree with you.

Never boasted in my life. What's more weird is why you are so incensed about 'virtue signallers'.

It is an interesting thread @chrisevans. What it demonstrates is that virtue signalling mostly exists in the eye of the beholder.

Still waiting for the psychology discussions other than whereismum said

I feel cheated... it's all guessing at motivations

@JackieWeaverHandforthCouncil

Meh I’m starting to see more posts about being anti virtual signalling, anti PC, anti-woke than the opposite recently. It’s as if being anti these things has also become a form of virtue signalling.

Ooh this is similar to what I wanted to post in the other virtue-signalling thread going on but couldn't be arsed to click it in the first place.

Well said. Anti-x,y,z has become the new cool gang looking for a pat on the back; the new x,y,z.

The thing about the phrase 'virtue-signalling' is that it's almost always used as an insult against someone - to make the insulter feel good I assume. I wonder how many of those who like to constantly harp on about it are getting off their arses and doing something productive about whatever the problem is.

When someone does something good to help others and feels proud of themselves what is wrong with saying so? There's no unwritten law that helping someone else is only valid if you don't get anything out of it yourself. As long as it's not done at the expense of those you help eg sharing a photo of the homeless person you just bought a coffee for would be the worst kind of exploitation.

If someone saying they gave blood today and feels good about it makes anyone else feel they need to attack them I have to wonder why.

You sure can tell who the virtue signallers are on this thread. grin The ones who are getting all huffy and sniffy at virtue signallers being badmouthed. wink
Or maybe some of us would prefer people didn't go out of their way to badmouth others at all.

It’s not always badmouthing for the sake of it though is it? Behavior needs challenging. Photographing the homeless man eating your free lunch and putting it on social media without their consent is not ok.

@TreborBore

It’s not always badmouthing for the sake of it though is it? Behavior needs challenging. Photographing the homeless man eating your free lunch and putting it on social media without their consent is not ok.

Obviously not. However, the term is bandied around as an insult in a lot of instances where it's not warranted. Besides, taking the time to spell out to someone the harm they are doing by the above behaviour is a lot more constructive than just throwing the latest in phrase at someone as an insult.

Captain Tom's daughter planned it.
.but its good example of what people could consider virtue signalling. Just because it's not what you consider it. Others have said that they consider attracting any attention to charitable work virtue signalling.

I don't think that's an example of virtual signalling at all. Of course some people may think so, just like people think the world is flat or we are run by lizard people. Other people getting confused about VS doesn't mean virtue signalling doesn't exist.

Thats really interesting about the bats @MrsTerryPratchett, I am often baffled by people who have disdain for people who they perceived to be helping causes and people they don't agree with, yet aren't willing to do anything for said groups themselves. The whole 'we need to help our homeless first' brigade for example. I'm sure they would be outraged should someone try and tell them what they should spend THEIR money on though.

I hate when a gesture of respect or solidarity becomes a cause for bullying. Look at poppies...

@CatsArePeople

I hate when a gesture of respect or solidarity becomes a cause for bullying. Look at poppies...

Oh absolutely. And the annual round of screaming bullshit from racists and fuckwits about how 'migrants' are prioritized over 'our boys' (ie military veterans) - which is, by the way, completely untrue.

Still no psychology on this thread!

Oh absolutely. And the annual round of screaming bullshit from racists and fuckwits about how 'migrants' are prioritized over 'our boys' (ie military veterans) - which is, by the way, completely untrue.

I still remember Jeremy Corbyn "poppy too small" debacle. Unbelievable.

I agree with whoever said virtue signalling is in the eye of the beholder. There's a very thin line between trying to publicise a good cause or encourage others to join in with something and doing something purely to burnish your credentials.

For example the vaccine badge: to some people it could be an irritating piece of smuggery, to others a well-intended nudge to people who are hesitant. It's not always clear cut and there may be mixed motives in the action in question: if someone wants to publicise their vaccination status on Facebook it could well be a combination of several motives, some public spirited, some selfish.

It is tedious when someone is blatantly using social media to do their own PR. But I think the kneejerk reaction against virtue signalling is just as bad in a way. Often this just tells you that someone has been made to feel guilty about something -- warranted or otherwise.

I would rather tolerate some annoying but harmless virtue signalling if the impact of this was that some people genuinely did change their behaviour, and I am also suspicious of the motives of anyone who never likes having their behaviour or views challenged: its a sign of a very fixed and unyielding mindset and probably not helpful.

@whereismumhiding3

Still no psychology on this thread!

You go first then.

This is a forum for Mums, not psychologists!

@TreborBore

There is a post on my local Facebook at the moment offering to buy a bag of shopping for someone who is skint. A lovely offer on the face of it but imagine you have no money for food and are reading the post. How does it make you feel? Think of your dignity and privacy. Safeguarding.

So this is the sort of thing I have noticed most recently.

A year ago it was more people changing their profile pics etc. And also people taking videos of themselves rescuing animals But the past two months what I am seeing is people offering to drop off food toys etc to a local family, does anyone know someone.

It seems like a weird trend, there are so many reasons this seems like a bad approach, why so many people are doing it all of a sudden seems strange.

@whereismumhiding3

Still no psychology on this thread!

Did you read my post? That was from a psychology lecture FWIW.

It seems like a weird trend, there are so many reasons this seems like a bad approach, why so many people are doing it all of a sudden seems strange.

It started around the first lockdown. Lots of local facebook groups sprung up, people offerring to shop for each other. Its not wrong, just with social media things can have unintended consequences if personal info is exchanged.

This is just like a "performance parenting" thread. A bunch of people denying that it is a thing.

Yvette Cooper in 2015 publicly offered to take in a refugee. As of 2022 she still hasn't actually gone ahead and done it. She made that pledge to score political points and didn't have any intention of following it through. She wasn't the only one, Bob Geldof made the same pledge and to the best of my knowledge hasn't delivered either. This is what virtue signalling is, it's showing just how good a person you are, without actually making an effort to be that good person.

@DdraigGoch

This is just like a "performance parenting" thread. A bunch of people denying that it is a thing.

Yvette Cooper in 2015 publicly offered to take in a refugee. As of 2022 she still hasn't actually gone ahead and done it. She made that pledge to score political points and didn't have any intention of following it through. She wasn't the only one, Bob Geldof made the same pledge and to the best of my knowledge hasn't delivered either. This is what virtue signalling is, it's showing just how good a person you are, without actually making an effort to be that good person.

Yeah, this ^ in spades.

Puts me mind of a woman I know who is woke and PC, and one of those typical virtue-signalling bores. About 2 years ago, she said she had taken in a refugee. I thought 'wow, she does actually put her money where her mouth is. She is helping a refugee!'

Turns out it was some over-privileged Swedish woman in her late 20s, who had been staying in the UK for the past year and a half, and working part time, whilst interrailing around Europe by train.

Her tenancy ended on her private-let apartment, and she didn't want to renew it as she was going back to Sweden soon. So she needed somewhere to stay for a short spell, because the 2-bed Stockholm apartment that her daddy was buying for her was being decorated and furnished, and wouldn't be ready for a few weeks.

This woman I know, knew this young Swedish woman, as she worked at the temp agency this woman had used, and she offered her her spare room for a few weeks, until her shiny new apartment in Stockholm was ready.

Refugee, my fucking arse!

@DdraigGoch

This is just like a "performance parenting" thread. A bunch of people denying that it is a thing.

Yvette Cooper in 2015 publicly offered to take in a refugee. As of 2022 she still hasn't actually gone ahead and done it. She made that pledge to score political points and didn't have any intention of following it through. She wasn't the only one, Bob Geldof made the same pledge and to the best of my knowledge hasn't delivered either. This is what virtue signalling is, it's showing just how good a person you are, without actually making an effort to be that good person.

Hmm not sure about that. I’d imagine prospective volunteers commit to intrusive checks and training. It is possible that no refugee was matched with them despite being approved. If I was in charge of settling refugees I’d look to have more potential homes than refugees just to make sure everyone can be offered a place they feel comfortable in, and I probably would look to avoid placing a refugee with someone famous if there was an alternative because they would have to be robust enough to deal with the press.

@TreborBore
Quoted by Trebor"

• whereismumhiding3 Still no psychology on this thread! 

Trevor's response --
You go first then.

This is a forum for Mums, not psychologists!

If you RTFT you'll see whereismumhiding3 DID go first and did respond with psychology terms and theories. Erm there are psychologists on this thread!

Her point was the title asked about the "psychology of it" And OP wasn't interested in that, instead she/he responded only to PPs of speculative guesses about motivations which isn't actual psychology!

I did an act of charity recently and I did have a bizarre urge to tell somebody about it. I didn't, because I felt that would then change it from a charitable act to a self-serving thing... but it did make me think of those MNers who start threads like "WIBU to give a homeless man £100?" They always invent a "friend who says I was unreasonable for spurious reasons" to justify making the bragging thread.

I suppose I did want people to know I'd done something nice. I'm not sure what that says about me, but the only psychological problem I have is anxiety.