Taking a job in a tiny business when pregnant

[Fromageetvino]

Ok so I know IABU but venting a little.
I took on my first FT employee in July this year (already have 1 x part timer). Three weeks in she disclosed that she is pregnant and is now off on Mat leave.

It’s an industry where recruiting is super difficult at the moment so getting a mat leave cover is likely to be practically impossible.

I know it’s her right etc, and of course have treated her fairly and she will be returning whenever she chooses to return.

But if I’m honest - it’s absolutely screwed our plans for any growth this year (on top of covid troubles).

While I know it’s “right” would you take on a job in a small business when pregnant?

Am prepared to get flamed here (hence the NC).

@CaptSkippy

This thread really surprises me.

I so see many threads on here with women who have been trying for months, sometimes years, to get pregnant. When they do it's hardly ever convenient.

And as for OP's situation, it's not a case of going under. It's simply a case of not growing. Furthermore, OP has also admitted that the labor market is really tight and Corona is not exactly helping either. So what is this pregnant employee having to bare the brunt of the blame for this situation?

When is pregnancy ever easy or conventient? Why are women expected to have children (with all the hand-wringing over low birth-rates) yet are not allowed the time and peace to actually have them? Why are our biological function so often seen as "obstacles" ?

I actually find this quite strange. Surely if it’s such a booming labour market there are plenty of better companies rather than OP

It's a right v right issue isn't it - she's right to be able to take a job and take leave as needed, but practically you'd have to be oblivious not to see that you're making the people in the tiny firm much worse off.

@TractorAndHeadphones
So it was very clear the stage we are at (very). The company isn’t brand new - we’ve been going for 7 years - but that has been with a suite of freelancers, myself and a part timer.

So this was the first “big hire”. Not mega bucks but big for us.

I come from a large corporate so think I’ve applied a lot of that in terms of interview process, HR process etc. I understand that it’s “my business” and an employee will never Care as much as I do. I’ve made it an inviting flexible place to work - as that is what the difference is between us and someone huge who can pay more.

OP, you were giving the impression that this was a brand new company. Now you are saying you've been running this company for 7 years... how on earth have you not planned for something like this happening? To me it seems you have no excuse.

@Freecuthbert

OP, you were giving the impression that this was a brand new company. Now you are saying you've been running this company for 7 years... how on earth have you not planned for something like this happening? To me it seems you have no excuse.

How did I give the impression it was brand new? I said it was small and it’s the first FT employee.

Why would I have planned for the contingencies for an employee who doesn’t exist?
It was me, then me and a part timer - then me, pt and ft. Is that difficult to understand?

I can see your experience has you upset and it sounds shit. But I’m not your ex-employer. My employee is off enjoying her mat leave and my thoughts on this won’t affect her.

[quote Fromageetvino]@TractorAndHeadphones
So it was very clear the stage we are at (very). The company isn’t brand new - we’ve been going for 7 years - but that has been with a suite of freelancers, myself and a part timer.

So this was the first “big hire”. Not mega bucks but big for us.

I come from a large corporate so think I’ve applied a lot of that in terms of interview process, HR process etc. I understand that it’s “my business” and an employee will never Care as much as I do. I’ve made it an inviting flexible place to work - as that is what the difference is between us and someone huge who can pay more.[/quote]
OP, you seem to have made a rod for your own back. You advertised the job as family-friendly and the person you hired took it with these exact expectations in mind.

It's not her fault you can't deliver on an empty promise.

@CaptSkippy I honestly didn’t expect her to be on mat leave after four months - yeah my naivety there.

But yeah - ok, I’ll take away my flexible working, working around school runs, not being contacted out of hours as a policy, etc. Is that better?

@Fromageetvino

Well surely with you and part time staff you would still have to have contingencies in place, such as for long term sickness/absence? You're telling me that for 7 years you didn't consider this, and still didn't consider this when opening up a full time position?

@cuddlymunchkin

And this is why I would never employ a woman of child bearing age.

Gosh , goshy yes to this, and while we are at it let’s not employ anyone likely to develop cancer, anyone with elderly infirm parents, anyone who might get knocked over crossing the road, anyone who might have mental health problems in the future, anyone who might have a stroke ...........

Everyone saying the employee should have declared their pregnancy at interview - the only possible value of this to the employer would be to allow them to directly discriminate against the pregnant woman. Is that really what you want?

I empathise with the challenges around the OP's position and respect the fact that she's treating her employee fairly, but I find a lot of the other comments on this thread really depressing.

[quote Freecuthbert]@Fromageetvino

Well surely with you and part time staff you would still have to have contingencies in place, such as for long term sickness/absence? You're telling me that for 7 years you didn't consider this, and still didn't consider this when opening up a full time position?[/quote]
Yes. And they are very different for a different role, on part time basis, outside of a pandemic.

You don’t set a strategy in year one and stick to it rigidly forever. I plan around a year at a time in detail. Funnily enough I didn’t predict a global pandemic which would cause a huge supply issue in terms of resource. Nor did I predict I’d be left in limbo with a pregnant employee - who took on the role without actually telling me she was already around six months pregnant.
I haven’t planned for an outbreak of rabies either.

@Freecuthbert do you manage a team at all?

You're acting like it's so shocking and unpredictable that an employee in "family friendly" role dared to get pregnant. Whether this was before or after she started the job is irrelevant. Pregnancy and maternity leave is normal in business... it's not audacious of her.

I have managed a service, not just a team. So yes.

[quote Fromageetvino]@CaptSkippy I honestly didn’t expect her to be on mat leave after four months - yeah my naivety there.

But yeah - ok, I’ll take away my flexible working, working around school runs, not being contacted out of hours as a policy, etc. Is that better?[/quote]
@Fromageetvino You can do whatever you like. It's your business.

But I feel sorry for the woman you hired. As you said the labor market is tight right now. She might have taken another job without a boss that is now seething in resentment because of their own mistake and making promises they could not afford to live up to.

Yanbu.
Anyone not understanding the impact of this on small businesses has never owned a business. It’s bloody tough. I had a small business with 2 on maternity leave together, both didn’t come back meanwhile my own maternity leave was 3 months long. I no longer employ people.

@Freecuthbert so - no I don’t think it’s shocking at all. It’s expected that women of child bearing age may become pregnant.
However what is more unusual is that someone is almost six months pregnant when they interview. Let’s be honest - in standard times - I would have clocked it myself.

Now my reason for the team question. How would you honestly feel if you had a team of three including you, and someone started and was pregnant: leaving you to pick up everything? Honestly.
Would, like me, you be a bit frustrated, a bit gutted etc?

Now throw in perhaps that, thanks to that, your team has missed out on being part of a project that could have meant a bit of a promotion for you. A little more money. An easing of pressure:

Would you feel a tiny bit of resentment. You’d understand etc; but you might want to vent on an anonymous forum

I've been in situations before with pregnant team members, and two on one team I managed going on mat leave together. Yes it left me with more work to do, but no I did not resent it as I see it just as part and parcel of life and working. Sorry not all of us have resentful attitudes towards pregnant women

I think you need to reassess your attitude OP because if you still have this level of resentment when she comes back off maternity leave or carry it through to the next employee who tells you they are pregnant you are going to end up losing a tribunal — and that really will put your business in jeopardy.

Fair enough to have a little vent but you are going to have to let it go. She hasn't done anything wrong and the law is quite rightly on her side

@ShirleyPhallus

I see recruitment as a long term issue. 6/9/12 months off isn’t really a big deal in the grand scheme of things if her skills were so niche you struggled to find someone.

Ultimately women of childbearing ages need jobs, and if you ever take on any woman between the age of 20-40 you accept the possibility of her getting pregnant

I'm 41 & pregnant... might need to widen that range a bit!

Are women expected to have children? Who says so?

@LaForza101 no - she will never have an inkling. She had a good send off on maternity leave, sent presents when the baby was born from us has been treated well and will continue to be treated well when she comes back.

If I come across as exasperated it’s likely because I’m knackered. And also as (in to be fair what I expected on AIBU) there are the typical posters who want to put the boot in.

@RoomOfRequirement

Wow this thread is just horrific. So many awful people in the comments. This is why employees don't give a fuck about work - because their employers think and talk about them like this for having lives. I would never put an employer first again and this is why.

And who do you think employers are? Robots? They are people too who also have lives, and have presumably worked their arses off to start their small business. Anyone who doesn't at least have sympathy for the OP and her predicament is a total bastard.

@Freecuthbert

I've been in situations before with pregnant team members, and two on one team I managed going on mat leave together. Yes it left me with more work to do, but no I did not resent it as I see it just as part and parcel of life and working. Sorry not all of us have resentful attitudes towards pregnant women

You are aware that I’ve actually been a pregnant woman right? It’s not just you.

I don't see how it makes any difference to the inconvenience for you that she was there for four months rather than, say, a year and four months before she went on mat leave?