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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Taking a job in a tiny business when pregnant

455 replies

Fromageetvino · 23/12/2021 13:13

Ok so I know IABU but venting a little.
I took on my first FT employee in July this year (already have 1 x part timer). Three weeks in she disclosed that she is pregnant and is now off on Mat leave.

It’s an industry where recruiting is super difficult at the moment so getting a mat leave cover is likely to be practically impossible.

I know it’s her right etc, and of course have treated her fairly and she will be returning whenever she chooses to return.

But if I’m honest - it’s absolutely screwed our plans for any growth this year (on top of covid troubles).

While I know it’s “right” would you take on a job in a small business when pregnant?

Am prepared to get flamed here (hence the NC).

OP posts:
AhNowTed · 23/12/2021 14:01

[quote Ducksareruiningmypatio]@AhNowTed
Unlikely.
She was not upfront, now the OP Has no employee and is expected to take her back and pay her holidays.
It's a very selfish approach and I simply couldn't do that to a small business.[/quote]
What's "unlikely"? That a woman pregnant or not needs a job to pay the bills?

NameChangeCity123 · 23/12/2021 14:01

I would be annoyed by this. She should have disclosed it at the interview. If I was her I would be worried about the atmosphere When I returned as it will likely be awkward and strained now that you've had to replace her so quickly. I'd also see her as a bit untrustworthy if I'm honest.

I've hired a pregnant woman before who disclosed that she was expecting and because she was perfect for the job and I wanted her in the team long term, it wasn't an issue for me but I did appreciate her honesty. Had she hid it, I think I would be angry and have lost a lot of respect for her

Original poster
Fromageetvino · 23/12/2021 14:01

@1concernedmummy

I think the real issue here is that the government could offer more financial support to small businesses to cover additional recruitment and HR admin costs. Some kind of small business maternity costs support grant perhaps. Particularly in sectors that are struggling but essential, like childcare.

As someone who tried for a baby for years due to fertility issues, then became pregnant just after starting a new job I am aware that babies cannot always be planned.

Yes this!! And of course I get that babies aren’t planned, I created a role that was completely attractive to parents. I’m just a little deflated that basically my first full time hire was with me for a grand total of 4 months before going on mat leave. Effectively rendering the whole thing pointless really.
OP posts:
Cazziebo · 23/12/2021 14:04

Why don't you have contingency plans for your staffing levels?

There speaks someone with no insight at all into running a small business.

lawandgin · 23/12/2021 14:04

Oh good, another thread about pregnant employees and how much of an inconvenience they are. Big business or small, this is one of the responsibilities of being an employer. Therefore YABU. Don't get me started on the utter pondlife who said they'd have fired her when they found out. Luckily, Tribunals tend to recognise the link between "Hey, I'm pregnant" and "sorry, it's just not working out".

viques · 23/12/2021 14:05

Can your PT employee have more hours? Even if they weren’t covering the pg employee they could perhaps cover some of your workload and release time for you. This would also upskill them which is never a bad thing.

ShirleyPhallus · 23/12/2021 14:05

@NameChangeCity123

I would be annoyed by this. She should have disclosed it at the interview. If I was her I would be worried about the atmosphere When I returned as it will likely be awkward and strained now that you've had to replace her so quickly. I'd also see her as a bit untrustworthy if I'm honest.

I've hired a pregnant woman before who disclosed that she was expecting and because she was perfect for the job and I wanted her in the team long term, it wasn't an issue for me but I did appreciate her honesty. Had she hid it, I think I would be angry and have lost a lot of respect for her

You have no right to be angry or lose respect at a woman who doesn’t disclose her pregnancy to you before accepting a role.

It’s just a fact of being an employer

Original poster
Fromageetvino · 23/12/2021 14:05

@AhNowTed if this was about “bill paying” I assume she would have stuck with her previous role- where she would have got paid for the leave.

OP posts:
RoyalFamilyFan · 23/12/2021 14:07

YABU. Employees have to put themselves first just as employers put themselves first.

Original poster
Fromageetvino · 23/12/2021 14:08

@viques

Can your PT employee have more hours? Even if they weren’t covering the pg employee they could perhaps cover some of your workload and release time for you. This would also upskill them which is never a bad thing.
Sadly not as they work around their childcare which is shared. I honestly do try and be a very inclusive employer (albeit a very small one).

It was just a bit of a set back really.

OP posts:
AhNowTed · 23/12/2021 14:08

@NameChangeCity123

I would be annoyed by this. She should have disclosed it at the interview. If I was her I would be worried about the atmosphere When I returned as it will likely be awkward and strained now that you've had to replace her so quickly. I'd also see her as a bit untrustworthy if I'm honest.

I've hired a pregnant woman before who disclosed that she was expecting and because she was perfect for the job and I wanted her in the team long term, it wasn't an issue for me but I did appreciate her honesty. Had she hid it, I think I would be angry and have lost a lot of respect for her

No she should not have disclosed it.

That's the law.

Holy shit are we still at this in 2021.

Would you expect a man to disclose his wife was pregnant and he would be taking paternity leave. You might expect so, but no that never happens and no one bats an eyelid.

Whatsdamatta · 23/12/2021 14:09

I’m with you op. Problem is, she accrues leave while she’s gone, her job can’t be permanently filled as she has the right to return to her old job, she can also take unpaid leave after her maternity leave is finished and you cannot take someone else on and promise them a permanent position as you won’t know if she’s coming back. I get you. It’s the uncertainty - you’re on hold until you know what her long term plans are. People who have employed other people and know how difficult in a small business it is to find the right person will understand that. It’s these things that make running a business a nightmare sometimes.

viques · 23/12/2021 14:10

@fromageetvino. Might be worth asking them all the same, you never know, they could be up for it!

Getyourarseofffthequattro · 23/12/2021 14:10

[quote Fromageetvino]@AhNowTed if this was about “bill paying” I assume she would have stuck with her previous role- where she would have got paid for the leave.[/quote]
Presumably she had to leave her old role for good reason, I mean you don't move jobs whilst pregnant forfeiting more pay and better conditions etc on a whim do you?

Shame she didn't find a more understanding employer. I get your frustration, genuinely, but it's always a possibility isn't it.

Original poster
Fromageetvino · 23/12/2021 14:11

Would you expect a man to disclose his wife was pregnant and he would be taking paternity leave. You might expect so, but no that never happens and no one bats an eyelid.

To be fair I’d be just as pissed off yes. As effectively it would still be the same issue.

OP posts:
Butchyrestingface · 23/12/2021 14:11

@Thehogfatherstolemycurry

Tbh I'd have got rid of her in August when you found out she was pregnant, in her probationary period I'd have just said it isn't working out.
Same. Also a tiny business owner.

On the other hand, in her position, if I were desperate I would have applied for the job... but I would be concerned about what it would do to my relationship with the boss.

DrinkFeckArseBrick · 23/12/2021 14:11

"Tbh I'd have got rid of her in August when you found out she was pregnant, in her probationary period I'd have just said it isn't working out."

That's illegal

Whatsdamatta · 23/12/2021 14:11

I think the whole point is it’s a small business not a big company where a number of people can pick up the slack.

Ducksareruiningmypatio · 23/12/2021 14:11

It's the law, but it doesn't help women of childbearing age when things like this happen.
Next post opens up, 3 candidates, one is a 30 year old woman, the other 2 aren't.
Who would likely be bottom of the list all things being equal?

HollowTalk · 23/12/2021 14:13

I know this sounds really horrible but I would fire her and get somebody else.

ShirleyPhallus · 23/12/2021 14:14

@HollowTalk

I know this sounds really horrible but I would fire her and get somebody else.
Also illegal
Original poster
Fromageetvino · 23/12/2021 14:16

[quote viques]@fromageetvino. Might be worth asking them all the same, you never know, they could be up for it![/quote]
I already did offer. They’ve been amazing to be fair. Taking in extra hours where they can.

OP posts:
RoyalFamilyFan · 23/12/2021 14:20

Lots of her who are employers saying they would act illegally.
This is why I don't trust employers and put myself first. Lots of employers treat you badly if it suits them.

Allsorts1 · 23/12/2021 14:20

I agree OP it does feel poor form to me. We have pretty good mat leave in the UK and although I know babies can’t always be planned - they mostly can, and I would feel pretty shit to do this to a small business to take a job knowing I was pregnant - different to becoming pregnant after the fact.

user1471457751 · 23/12/2021 14:22

You do realise with shared parental leave you could have a man going off for 6 months of leave?

maybe you need to make the temp contract more appealing. If its an employees market then you need to meet that expectation if you want to hire someone.