To ask when you told close family and friends you were pregnant?

[Pearldrops04]

Did you wait til past the 12 week mark?

I don't know how people do it. I've only known I'm pregnant for a few days and I'm already fed up of keeping it a secret/ lonely/ wanting to TALK to people about it, well, female friends and close family members that have had children.

I have no idea how I'm going to go another 8 weeks not saying anything, or without anyone twigging when I'm not drinking over the festive period (I never not drink when out socially)

We had IVF so our immediate family knew straight away as they've been there through all of it. I'm going for a booster jab tomorrow so I'll actually have to say it out loud which I'm a bit scared about!

Around 20 wks and that’s only because SIL was pregnant with her second and DH wanted to tell his parents then.

I honestly wasn’t bothered tbh and would have not said anything even if it was obvious. I wouldn’t have family nearby and it would just be me and DH as it usually is so didn’t see the point of saying anything until baby was here. If I had miscarried I wouldn’t tell anyone because it’s none of their business and I rather come to terms with it on my own. Knowing my own parents and in-laws they would have cases of “foot in mouth” disease and I wouldn’t want to deal with that on top of it.

Told 2 best friends and both sets of parents immediately. Work, other people after 12 week mark.

@HeyFloof

DS1, after the 12 weeks scan. DS2, 8 weeks, he died at 21+4. DD, couldn't even say the words "I'm pregnant", told close family at 14 weeks when we knew we were going to lose her too. Told everyone else who needed to know after she'd been born and died.

You tell who you want, be excited, enjoy being pregnant (if you can), don't take on any advice that you don't like, just be. Pregnancy can be wonderful and it can be absolutely shit too. Do what gets you through, and if that means shouting it from the roof tops then go for it. If it means keeping it to yourself then that's OK too.

There are due date threads on here which may be useful to you as it's women at the same stage as you.

@HeyFloof

DS died at 21+2

He was my first pregnancy. Since then I don't care who I tell and at what gestation. Things can go "wrong" in the pregnancy right up until the birth.

Just after the 12 week scan for me, with all of mine, BUT, we all have different levels of privacy and we all have different levels of relationships with different people.
Do what you feel is right for you.

First pregnancy i told imediate family straight away, close friends at about 7 weeks after an early scan and officially announced om social media at 16 weeks.

Seccond pregnancy (currently 10 weeks with) told my parents and partners parent this week (separated parents, one is currently isolating as has covid and we want to tell in person). I think the plan is to tell other imediate family (siblings and grandparents) christmas day but im hesitant telling my sister as im due 10 days after her wedding im supposed to be bridesmaid at and my first came 3 weeks early😬 ill be telling work after my current promotion goes fully through in january as i dont want it to affect my promotion. Half hoping we go into lockdown so theres no pressure of announcing to anyone, i quite like the privacy of so little people knowing

Close friends and extended family at about 25 weeks - as the baby is possibly viable at 24 weeks and it was getting harder to hide it anyway. But I did tell my parents as soon as I got a positive test, as I'd have gone crazy not being able to tell anyone at all (I'm a solo mum to be, so no partner to discuss the pregnancy with but they are very supportive).

I asked my folks to keep it a secret and they kindly did until I was ready to tell people. I still haven't told wider friends/acquaintances though (I'm hiding 7 month bump in baggy layered clothes as I usually only meet people outside!) as I'm a higher risk pregnancy due to my age and fertility issues and I'm so nervous of something going wrong.

DC1: DP only told his family at 38 wks, everyone else celebrated with us when we announced at 20 wks. DC2 about 16wks.

Told parents straight away (6 weeks). Told other close family (siblings and bff) at 14 weeks. Didn't announce it after that, but stopped hiding it after 20 week scan.

Pretty much straight away. It wasn't a planned pregnancy with a loving DH. I was shocked, alone, panicking and needed the support!

I told mum & siblings at about 6 weeks every time. I was glad I had as I needed their support with the 3 miscarriages I had each at 10 weeks.

I told people, as I saw them. So, whatever stage I was at. Some knew at six weeks, some at ten weeks, some when I had the baby.
Didn’t make any announcement about my pregnancy. My aunties got a real surprise when they saw me at 20 weeks!

I told my mum straightaway both times. I miscarried the first pregnancy and I'm glad she knew about it.

Close friends were told after my mum knew, so very early days. When I lost the twins, I didn't want to talk about it for a few months afterwards so kind of glad I hadn't told anyone else because then I'd have to have said I'd lost them. It was hard enough saying the words to my mum and best friends.

DS1 was through IVF so close family knew very early as they knew we were doing it. Told others, including people at work after the 12 week scan. Lost him at 16 weeks. There was then a lot of people to inform I wasn't pregnant any more. Including babies 9 cousins, a lot of whom were pretty young. It was difficult.
DS2 told parents at about 6 weeks but no one else. Other close family after 12 week scan apart from children who we didn't tell until 20 week scan. Tried to not tell work until 20 weeks but it was obvious by about 18. Similar for DD.
If you need to talk about it then of course you should, but I would choose the people you divulge to carefully.

We only told one or two family members. But I also joined the birth group in baby centre (mums all due same time) was a good place to discuss all things baby lol x

And bestie lol That’s straight away the rest waited until 12 weeks

16 weeks for family and a few weeks later for work. I wanted to be treated as a normal person with opinions about normal things rather than just talking baby things all the time. Totally understand that others can't wait to talk about it though

Ds1 told parents at 7 weeks after viability scan (IVF) everyone else after 12 weeks, bad news at 20 weeks but D's survived.
Baby 2- told parents straight away, miscarried at 8 weeks
Ds2 told people at 12 weeks, died at 26 weeks
Ds3 told dps family at 14 weeks because we were visiting and they were wanting to give me alcohol and to get into hot tub, told my parents at 18 weeks because I couldn't hide it anymore (they behaved atrociously when ds2 died so didn't want to tell them). Told dps adult children at 25 weeks after anatomy scan and fetal heart scan because we wanted to limit their pain if it was bad news. Made announcement to everyone else at 32 weeks, now 36 weeks.

Found out we were pregnant first week of December 2018, had to tell my family at Christmas (so around 6 weeks) we went for an early scan to make sure all was ok. We would have waited till 12 weeks but we were going to Ireland for NYE with friends then The Netherlands with others friends in Jan. We wanted our family to know first so we were forced in to it.

At about 8 weeks with my parents and business partner (who is also a dear friend).

I told a broader range of people at 12 weeks (post scan).

Pregnancy 1: 6 weeks (after miscarriage)
Pregnancy 2: 11 weeks (after miscarriage)
Pregnancy 3: 12 weeks after scan

After the miscarriage in my first pregnancy (we'd only found out 3 days before and hadn't told a soul), we were too worried to tell anyone before the 12 week scan. It was an anxious time x

I told my parents straight away and my MIL at 13 weeks after the 12 week scan. I am now 21 weeks and only my brother and sister know. We told my 4 year old daughter yesterday and will tell DH siblings sometime this week. Oh, my manager at work knows, I told him at 19 weeks.

I never told anyone about any of my 3 pregnancies at the time. I had planned a small, close family BBQ after the 12 week scan with my 1st pregnancy. 2 days before the scan, I got back the NIPT results which showed patau syndrome and it ended with TFMR.

For me, I didn't want others to feel uncomfortable, not know what to say. I have enough support from DH, so didn't feel the need to tell wider family/friends at the time. I'd always planned to tell them after the 12 week or 20 week scanned, but unfortunately, in all 3 pregnancies, I never got that far. Congratulations and best of luck OP

Both times I've told everyone I'd tell if I had a miscarriage. So close friends and my parents, told PIL after an early scan at DH's request to wait. Everyone else 12 week scan.
Told work early too as I work a job that needs a risk assessment ASAP while pregnant.

After the 12 week scan for everyone except a little whatsapp group of longstanding online friends, who I told the day I found out at 7 weeks.

I'm the only possible bearer of grandchildren on both sides and I knew we wouldn't do IVF or keep trying if we had multiple losses, so I didn't want to get anyone's hopes up in case of early missed miscarriage.

Told work at about 15 weeks. It was summer and hard to suck in the belly!