To think periods are a terrible design flaw in the human race

[CrumpledCrumpet]

Humans are quite remarkably cleverly designed creatures. Binocular vision, opposable thumbs, walking upright - we’ve got it all going on. But honestly, who came up with periods?

AIBU to think this is a massive design fault and someone needs to go back to the drawing board and come up with something better?

Hmm, good thread.

Why can’t we reabsorb the blood?

@CrumpledCrumpet I was with you on the owl pellet thing until the idea of shooting it out. Can’t it just come out all carefully and nicely? Shooting it out sounds painful and negating of the reason behind jr

I think there are evolutionary advantages to period (not that I’m
pro period) and there’s that weird thing that baby humans are completely vulnerable whereas if they cook for another 6 months they’d be less useless but obviously couldn’t actually be born then.

I think eggs sound great. Least it’s a unfoRm shape to squeeze out and would be easier to take lovely photoshoots.

Oh OP, I'm having visions of myself lay on my bed, legs akimbo in the air and shooting out my period pellet 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[quote Choice4567]@CrumpledCrumpet I was with you on the owl pellet thing until the idea of shooting it out. Can’t it just come out all carefully and nicely? Shooting it out sounds painful and negating of the reason behind jr[/quote]
I was thinking it’d be a great party trick.

But in prehistory women wouldn't have had periods. They would have been constantly pregnant or breastfeeding from the time they reached puberty until their death/menopause. A bit like other mammals which basically breed constantly.

Modern women have way more periods in their lifetime now than previously.

We start earlier, go on later, get pregnant less often and don't die so early / so often in childbirth.

I'd be more than happy with a text once a month instead of an actual period it could say. 'Period here, have some chocolate, see you next month'
Or
'Due to pregnancy, this text service will be put on hold'

@musicalfrog

But in prehistory women wouldn't have had periods. They would have been constantly pregnant or breastfeeding from the time they reached puberty until their death/menopause. A bit like other mammals which basically breed constantly.

Yes I assume this is why there isn’t a great degree of evolutionary pressure to sort this nonsense out - the most ‘successful’ females are constantly pregnant or lactating.

The ones who aren’t can get taken out by predators.

YANBU. An approx 40 year source of monthly misery and expense.

Loving the egg idea though. Think of all opportunities for people to put hatching photoshoots on Insta. On second thoughts...

@musicalfrog

But in prehistory women wouldn't have had periods. They would have been constantly pregnant or breastfeeding from the time they reached puberty until their death/menopause. A bit like other mammals which basically breed constantly.

I've heard this argument before, but surely it wasn't constant? Not every female was constantly pregnant or breastfeeding - miscarriages, widowhood, men off to war, etc. I have read that many ancient societies were more supportive of menstruating women.

I always think they are a bit funny!

Like, nature has this problem in which a womb lining is no longer needed.

Solution: Put a hole in the bottom and just let it drop out

Laying an egg sounds great. But would it involve a lot of huffing and puffing about in a toilet? Or would it be like passing a sturdy poo?

I'm not sure I'd like to get caught out and have to lay my egg at work or in a pub toilet.

TBF, walking upright has its downsides. Just ask my upper back, lower back and knees.

While we are at it, two sets of teeth, one set lasts 10 years tops, the other is meant to last the rest of your life. What’s up with that?

It is annoying to think that if I don’t have children I’ll have bled every month for no reason at all for 30-40 years.

I think if periods were properly researched and all women got the help they need we’d find them a lot easier. But they’re still not ideal.

@Classica

Laying an egg sounds great. But would it involve a lot of huffing and puffing about in a toilet? Or would it be like passing a sturdy poo?

I'm not sure I'd like to get caught out and have to lay my egg at work or in a pub toilet.

This is absolutely brilliant and has made me laugh out loud. “Sturdy poo” - utterly fab description!

An a former evolutionary biologist, I think much of the problem is that we've evolved in some ways but other things haven't caught up.

By moving to two legs rather than four, we've changed the pelvic capacity, whilst we've selected for larger headed babies that stay in the womb longer. This ends up leading to difficult births. The situation will only get worse as in the past the offspring wouldn't have survived to be able to give birth with their narrow hips and large heads themselves, but because of c-sections, we're perpetuating the problem. Bipedalism is probably related to a lot of back issues too.

We're also supposed to be pregnant throughout our fertile years, and then die pretty young. If you're pregnant you don't typically have to worry about periods, although admittedly the pregnancy and birth isn't much fun either.

We should probably die about when we reach the menopause, so that wouldn't have been a big issue.

I blame modern medicine.

@GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing

To be fair, teeth would be totally fine if we didn’t eat sugar

This isn’t true. I’ve had a year of awful trouble with my teeth which hasn’t been to do with sugar. A mixture of grinding at night/heredity and bad luck it seems. They do just go wrong sometimes!

I've never had major period problems thankfully so I find periods to be a mild inconvenience. I just put up with it for a few days each month. After all these years it really doesn't bother me anymore.

If I had a serious medical issue like endometriosis/ infertility etc I'm sure my views would be different.

Not every female was constantly pregnant or breastfeeding - miscarriages, widowhood, men off to war, etc. I have read that many ancient societies were more supportive of menstruating women.

You're not going back far enough - evolution works over much longer timescales except when there's really strong selection, and whilst periods are bloody annoying, having them isn't going to kill you before you can reproduce. So we have to look back as far as mammals ancestors. (And anyway, much of human history involved women being pregnant or breastfeeding most of their adult lives even up to Victorian times, and still in some parts of the world today.)

@Magik01

While we are at it, two sets of teeth, one set lasts 10 years tops, the other is meant to last the rest of your life. What’s up with that?

It made more sense when the average life expectancy was 30.

There are many problems with the current model, to be honest.

The Most Unfortunate Design Flaws in the Human Body

I quite like the cyclic rhythm of periods

Our fallopian tubes are open at both ends, causing a backwash effect of blood into the abdominal cavity during menstruation. Our immune systems are supposed to clean up the resulting mess, but in some unlucky individuals (i.e me) this process partly or wholly fails, leaving old blood behind which not only causes scarring but deposits womb cells where they should not be, which in turn causes further bleeding each month, more scarring, dreadful pain, and strangest of all, can severely impact on fertility

Intelligent design, my fucking arse!