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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To feel really embarrassed after works Christmas parties?

124 replies

again2020 · 16/12/2021 09:58

Last night was the works Christmas do which I'd organized. We had a good time and I stayed out quite late.
I'm looking back and cringing at everything I said. It was nothing too bad, I remember telling the big boss I loved beer 🙈😂 then having a good chat about music and chatting with my boss at length about films. I tried to join in some of the football chat and I don't think it went down too well.
I get very animated and chatty after a few drinks. At work I'm quite shy and get on with things.
I'm a little hungover today cringing at myself. I almost wish I hadn't gone!
Can anyone relate?

OP posts:

inawe · 16/12/2021 11:06

Doesn't sound like you have anything to worry about, just a case of bear fear.
When I think of Christmas parties, I always remember that I'd have to go a long way to top former boss who projectile vomited over three of my colleagues (after downing cocktails at a rate that would have had me under the table, and topping it off with a whole bottle of champagne), and the two colleagues (married, but not to each other) caught shagging in the ladies loos. Every year someone does something that reminds me why I only have a couple of drinks at the Christmas do!

succession · 16/12/2021 11:07

Hangxiety is a genuine biological reality. Loads of brain chemicals involved, really interesting

inawe · 16/12/2021 11:07

Beer fear. No bears at our Christmas parties.

WorraLiberty · 16/12/2021 11:08

@Moff2k

No not this year. There's a serious pandemic. I can't actually believe people are going....

Oh dear...

TremoloGreen · 16/12/2021 11:08

Sounds fine. Read another Xmas party story where a new guy got drunk and incapable, couldn't even remember where he lived. One of his new colleagues took him home to sleep on his sofa. In the middle of the night, he got up, wandered around and ended up peeing in their bin.

Could be worse.

notanothertakeaway · 16/12/2021 11:09

@Moff2k

No not this year. There's a serious pandemic. I can't actually believe people are going....

@Moff2k

You're getting a hard time here. I agree with you. I wouldn't be going to a works party at the moment

JuicySatsuma85 · 16/12/2021 11:09

Oh Jesus Christ…I thought this might be a really interesting, juicy works night out story but your embarrassed you were chatty and said you like beer? Wow. You should try getting out more OP. I promise you no one is gathering round the water cooler discussing the juicy gossip that you like beer.

Allsorts1 · 16/12/2021 11:09

It’s all fine! It often helps to get philosophical about our tiny place in time and in the universe - life is here to be enjoyed, to let your hair down and get chatty! People have done and said much more embarrassing things and survived - and as long as you make people feel good about themselves, no one really cares what you say.

At the end of the day I always calm myself down by telling myself that if it all goes tits up I can always change my name and move to a remote island.

cheeseislife8 · 16/12/2021 11:09

Oh, the beer fear! We've all done it! You'll have been fine OP, sounds pretty harmless!

MissOrganisedMe · 16/12/2021 11:12

I relate, totally! This is actually why I stopped drinking. Feeling like this after every event where I'd had a drink was exhausting. I hated it. Even though, on balance, I knew that I'd had a good time and nothing terrible had happened.

It's been over 5 years now. I don't miss it but socially, it can be difficult because I feel like friends/colleagues struggle sometimes when I'm choosing not to drink. I definitely prefer it.

pinata · 16/12/2021 11:12

Don’t beat yourself up - remember, everyone else will have had a few drinks as well, not like you were drunk in a room full of sober people

LemonGiraffe · 16/12/2021 11:14

Everyone else will have been just as drunk and so not fully remember, or too busy worrying about what they said.

Sounds like you were just chatty- which is no bad thing. You weren't rolling around on the floor drunk or trying to kiss someone.

Turn it around, can you remember cringe/over chatty conversations that may be embarrassing for colleagues? Probably not.

IamGusFring · 16/12/2021 11:16

@Santahatesbraisedcabbage

You could have told big boss you loved him!!

or shagged him so sounds all good to me 😂

JustLikeaJingleBell · 16/12/2021 11:16

At least you remember it so you weren't too drunk.

I'm sure you were lovely

Franca123 · 16/12/2021 11:18

You've got hang-anxiety. Sounds like you were fun. I can certainly tell you some stories of people making proper idiots of themselves!

RedRocketGirl · 16/12/2021 11:19

@again2020 doesn't sound like you have anything to worry about - it could have been so much worse..... No 2 on this list gets reprinted every year:
www.askamanager.org/2017/12/i-will-confront-you-by-wednesday-of-this-week-and-other-holiday-stories.html

Ariann · 16/12/2021 11:20

If you are cringing at what you said after a party where you were drinking, you need to consider if the drinking is really worth that feeling the next day.

Georgeskitchen · 16/12/2021 11:20

I always wonder next day if i made an arse of myself but having witnessed the behaviour of some colleagues and when the gossip filters out, I usually feel positively Angelic!!!

emmathedilemma · 16/12/2021 11:22

Isn't this what office Xmas parties are all about??
It's always the quiet ones who come out of their shell after a couple of drinks!

LindaEllen · 16/12/2021 11:28

@Moff2k

No not this year. There's a serious pandemic. I can't actually believe people are going....

Oh bore off, for goodness sake.

I was about to say you must be fun at parties.. but you don't go to any.

KittyKattyFosterMummy · 16/12/2021 11:30

@Floyi

Why is it the ultimate of cool for Brits to get drunk at a party. They can never 'remember' what they said or did, just letting our hair down etc. all relayed to an audience to show just how 'happening' they are.

Why can't you drink moderately and just be yourself? why would not being drunk mean you can't have fun? this false ideology seems so enmeshed in everyone.

Well there's a sweeping statement and a half. Thanks for tarring every British person with the same "enmeshed ideology"! I don't see anyone saying it's "cool" to get drunk at a party or that they are trying to prove they are "happening" (what does that even mean in this context?!)

BlaBlaSmthSmth · 16/12/2021 11:31

@Moff2k

No not this year. There's a serious pandemic. I can't actually believe people are going....

You can't believe people are spending time with the colleagues they work with day in day out?

Get a life 🙈

hangrylady · 16/12/2021 11:36

@Moff2k

No not this year. There's a serious pandemic. I can't actually believe people are going....

for you

BlaBlaSmthSmth · 16/12/2021 11:36

"You're getting a hard time here. I agree with you. I wouldn't be going to a works party at the moment"

They're getting a hard time because of their snotty post which was completely irrelevant to the OP.

hangrylady · 16/12/2021 11:37

Everyone will have had a few. Unless you did anything totally outrageous you won't have stood out as being really drunk

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