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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Should nursery of notified me?

103 replies

Covidtrap · 16/12/2021 08:46

Got turned away from the door at nursery this morning (on my way to work) as son has been unwell, high fever, a bit lethargic, not eating and loose nappies x2 over two days. I put all this down to teething as he has had very similar in the past also he has runny nose and dribbling alot, biting etc. I didnt want to send him in but i am a lone parent basically his dad only has him one day a week and when i asked if he could take him as i didnt want him im nursery he refused to take time off work and i have no carers leave left due to him having covid, previous sickness etc. Anyway they tell me we cant take him in as have had a vomiting bug in his room since monday? Shouldnt i of been notified via their app or email as i always thought hes just teething but hasnt been himself. They also did the same with an outbreak of foot and mouth. I travelled back to my home country a day later i notice blisters etc and took him to aed as i didnt know what it was at the time. I then get an email a few days later saying theyve had foot and mouth in his room for over two weeks new cases. Shouldnt u be notified if theres even one just to be mindful and keep an eye out? Also had i of known about vomiting bug i may of been able to make arangements or try and swap shifts

OP posts:
Comingup · 16/12/2021 11:49

I get it OP. But honestly, no you can't use childcare like this when your child is unwell. We've most of us been there. I had a vile boss who went galloping down to HR each time I had to call in and say my child was ill, to " raise a grievance ". Horrible. Even so, I still had to have off work ...

AD80 · 16/12/2021 12:03

So you are complaining that they never told you about the sickness at the same time you tried sending your clearly under the weather child in! 🤦‍♀️ This is why bugs spread

Bettyboop3 · 16/12/2021 12:22

HAVE!!!!!!!
I work in a nursery and would not expect someone to keep their child home purely for teething. This can go on for weeks or even months. It's ridiculous to expect parents to miss so much work and pay for a service they are being refused access to. Teething is not illness but can cause nasty symptoms. I'm more than happy to give calpol or apply bonjela to make the child feel more comfortable.

Emilizz34 · 16/12/2021 12:32

YABU
You’re unhappy that the nursery didn’t inform you about a sickness bug and yet you were willing to put him into nursery while he sounds quite unwell with several symptoms .
You cannot assume that this is all down to teething . You could have put other children at risk by sending a sick child in

HelloCovid · 16/12/2021 12:43

YABU to take him but YANBU to think they should notify you of things like foot and mouth.

GoodPrincessWenceslas · 16/12/2021 17:50

@HelloCovid

YABU to take him but YANBU to think they should notify you of things like foot and mouth.
To be honest, if they had foot and mouth I think they would have had more to worry about than notifying OP ...
OnceuponaRainbow18 · 16/12/2021 17:52

Shouldn’t be in for 48 hours after a fever

5keletor · 16/12/2021 17:58

YABU, they should notify you about illness in advance, but you should be able to send your poorly child in to possibly infect others? I doubt the poor thing wanted to be in nursery anyway if he's poorly.
I always hope other parents will be courteous as we are and not send obviously sick children in, but after reading the OP I guess there are those who simply don't think of others.

LoveMyPiano · 16/12/2021 18:02

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

Scandisaurus · 16/12/2021 18:37

This reply has been deleted

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Justheretoaskaquestion91 · 16/12/2021 19:37

Is correcting grammar breaking MN guidelines?!

LoveMyPiano · 16/12/2021 19:46

@Justheretoaskaquestion91

Is correcting grammar breaking MN guidelines?!
It seems that it is Hmm
Waspsarearseholes · 16/12/2021 20:12

The number of children we have had to send home this week is absurd. Nearly a third of the school. Many parents were angry at being called to collect their children as they seem to think that as long as it's not covid they're ok to be in school. These parents are so utterly selfish I cannot put it into words politely. The other families and staff members don't deserve to have their Christmas ruined by illness caught from your sick child. Your child deserves to be looked after at home by his mum when he is ill. You should have informed the nursery that he was too ill to go in, not the other way round.

Justheretoaskaquestion91 · 16/12/2021 20:30

@LoveMyPiano

How odd

Somethingsnappy · 16/12/2021 20:34

Maybe it's just breaking the 'don't be an arsehole' guidelines.

Bettyboop3 · 16/12/2021 20:46

Mine wasn't deleted but i wasn't rude (i don't think)

Somethingsnappy · 16/12/2021 20:58

@Bettyboop3

Mine wasn't deleted but i wasn't rude (i don't think)
It was rude and patronising. In my opinion.
Justheretoaskaquestion91 · 16/12/2021 21:14

@Somethingsnappy

I think it’s ok to point out a grammatical error. I didn’t want to be “that person”, so I didn’t, but I’m a bit surprised/annoyed in a way that it was deleted. It’s not offensive and it’s certainly less insulting than many of the other things on MN that aren’t deleted.

Somethingsnappy · 16/12/2021 21:20

[quote Justheretoaskaquestion91]@Somethingsnappy

I think it’s ok to point out a grammatical error. I didn’t want to be “that person”, so I didn’t, but I’m a bit surprised/annoyed in a way that it was deleted. It’s not offensive and it’s certainly less insulting than many of the other things on MN that aren’t deleted.[/quote]
But why, what's the point of it? To embarrass the OP? What other reason would someone have to correct a stranger's grammar?

Justheretoaskaquestion91 · 16/12/2021 21:27

Maybe they genuinely don’t know and it’s helpful for them to learn/not be wrong their whole life? My mother always taught me that regardless of the context, it was always “so and so and I”. I didn’t learn until about 5 years ago when someone pointed out my mistake that this is incorrect. I feel much better for knowing my mistake!

LoveMyPiano · 16/12/2021 21:44

The misuse (and I do understand how it happens, as it seems to come for the 've contraction, and that can sound like "of", and people can sometimes write how things sound.....?) - of "of/have" - particularly in a title - does, sadly, detract from the content.

And then, when the content of the post could be construed as thoughtless or even and stupid and dangerous, it does make matters worse.
What's wrong with having standards, while we still can?
And I could have been ruder, and therefore "justifiably" had my comment deleted Hmm

LoveMyPiano · 16/12/2021 21:45

@Somethingsnappy

Maybe it's just breaking the 'don't be an arsehole' guidelines.
That was NOT being an arsehole.
PAFMO · 16/12/2021 21:52

@LoveMyPiano

The misuse (and I do understand how it happens, as it seems to come for the 've contraction, and that can sound like "of", and people can sometimes write how things sound.....?) - of "of/have" - particularly in a title - does, sadly, detract from the content. And then, when the content of the post could be construed as thoughtless or even and stupid and dangerous, it does make matters worse. What's wrong with having standards, while we still can? And I could have been ruder, and therefore "justifiably" had my comment deleted Hmm
Gotta love it when Muphry comes to bite your arse. "Having standards" would hopefully (though clearly not in your case) mean not making EIGHT mistakes in the post quoted above. Glass houses and all that.
PAFMO · 16/12/2021 21:53

(I reported both of you, by the way)

santasmuma · 16/12/2021 21:57

@Justheretoaskaquestion91

Maybe they genuinely don’t know and it’s helpful for them to learn/not be wrong their whole life? My mother always taught me that regardless of the context, it was always “so and so and I”. I didn’t learn until about 5 years ago when someone pointed out my mistake that this is incorrect. I feel much better for knowing my mistake!

But when you said 'so and so and I' whoever you were speaking to knew exactly what you meant, which is the point of language - communication. You managed to communicate that you were with someone to someone else. That's enough.

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