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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Annoyed with Neighbours

64 replies

Middmary · 14/12/2021 18:48

I live in a small apartment block. About 12 flats. Only lived here about 2 months but also im always working so only met one neighbour (who let me in once before). Locked myself out by mistake. Wanted to be let back in. Tried every single house number no one answered. About half an hr in, an uber driver comes. They answer the door to him! I was literally so irritated! Tried to ring back but they didnt answer me. Then about an hr later a man walks out with his dog! Told him off but he just ignored me. I am so annoyed it is unbelievable. Want to leave a note at the entrance saying something. Husband says it’s petty but I am so annoyed Right now!

Id like to add it was late, dark and freezing cold! And im a woman! Small! Not a huge person that would freak someone out!

I know ppl r cautious but to not answer at all! Or even ask why I am ringing their bell. What kind of world do we live in! R ppl really becoming so unhelpful and horrible. Or are we becoming anti social? I know a lot of ppl dont have house phones or if they do they dont answer but who doesnt anser the door!? Just made me lose all faith in ppl honestly!

Had to let tht out but rant over now.

Aibu or should I leave a note saying something?

OP posts:
Jeffjefftyjeff · 14/12/2021 18:54

Did they know it was you? If not they’re just people ignoring someone ringing their doorbell. Lots of people do this if not expecting anyone, especially if it’s late

ABCeasyasdohrayme · 14/12/2021 18:55

They don't know you, you could be anyone.

Yabu to tell anyone off because they didn't help fix your mistake.

Ywbvu to leave a note up because nobody let a stranger (to them) in the building.

Be more careful next time.

ForbiddentoForbid · 14/12/2021 18:56

Reverse?

AgentProvocateur · 14/12/2021 18:56

They’re probably all mumsnetters. They’re the only people I know who don’t answer the door unless it’s a prearranged call. I find it really weird not to answer a buzzer or a doorbell.

Aliceinunderland · 14/12/2021 18:57

How would they know who you are? I wouldn't answer the buzzer late at night either as I would know it wasn't for me. I can understand your frustration but the neighbours didn't do anything wrong.

ForbiddentoForbid · 14/12/2021 19:00

I used to live in a block of flats in a busy area and constantly had drunk passers by/random delivery people for other addresses/teenagers/homeless people buzzing at all hours.

I only ever answered my buzzer if I was expecting a guest or a delivery. I mostly turned my buzzer off.

Takeaway delivery people would just press all of the flat buzzers at random, sometimes a homeless person would get in and would be asleep in the corridor in the morning.

If I was buzzed I'd look out my window and not answer unless I was expecting someone. Otherwise I'd be answering to ransoms 5 times an evening.

Original poster
Middmary · 14/12/2021 19:01

Atleast have the decency to answer though rather than ignore. Even if u answer and say sorry i dont know if u live here, so wont open. Is better than ignoring completely.

And we have cameras so they can see who is there

OP posts:
DontPeeInThePlayHouse · 14/12/2021 19:01

I used to hate this when we lived in a block of flats. I'm not gonna buzz in a stranger because you say you lost your keys. You could be anyone and have any motive for gaining access.

msbevvy · 14/12/2021 19:03

We get people on a very regular basis pretending to have locked themselves out when they really want to get in order to smoke drugs on the stairs . Do regular that some people ignore the entryphone unless they're expecting somebody.
Maybe your neighbours have had similar experiences.

ABCeasyasdohrayme · 14/12/2021 19:04

@Middmary

Atleast have the decency to answer though rather than ignore. Even if u answer and say sorry i dont know if u live here, so wont open. Is better than ignoring completely.

And we have cameras so they can see who is there

Why would it be decent to answer and not let you in?

The end result is the same Confused

Why should anyone be 'decent' to randomers ringing their doorbell late at night?

sweeneytoddsrazor · 14/12/2021 19:05

Who doesn't answer the door?

Most of Mumsnet unless you have an appointment or have sent a text asking g if you can visit.

Original poster
Middmary · 14/12/2021 19:05

Its vry strange to me as we always answer the door! Even if we dont know the person. By answering it doesnt mean you automatically let me in. Who doesnt andwer the doorbell! Sorry disagree with you all! 😂😂😂 but thanks for letting me know how some ppl might have seen it

OP posts:
ForbiddentoForbid · 14/12/2021 19:06

@Middmary

Atleast have the decency to answer though rather than ignore. Even if u answer and say sorry i dont know if u live here, so wont open. Is better than ignoring completely.

And we have cameras so they can see who is there

But there a lots of reasons they wouldn't answer op - see my previous post.

And if it was late and dark they may well have had their buzzers turned off.

Stop locking yourself out.

BobbieT1999 · 14/12/2021 19:06

Yanbu to be cross but you're not going to help yourself by making a fuss

ForbiddentoForbid · 14/12/2021 19:06

@msbevvy

We get people on a very regular basis pretending to have locked themselves out when they really want to get in order to smoke drugs on the stairs . Do regular that some people ignore the entryphone unless they're expecting somebody. Maybe your neighbours have had similar experiences.

Yep, walked into my lobby on occasion in the morning to find someone passed out.

Original poster
Middmary · 14/12/2021 19:06

And it wasnt tht late. Like 6 but it gets dark at 4. So it was late for me. Not like it was midnight or unsociable hours

OP posts:
Original poster
Middmary · 14/12/2021 19:11

Its a nice area. Quiet. Not close to anything, not even a shop. Nearest shop is like 20mins walk. That sort of stuff doesnt happen here. Its why we moved here. Ppl are just more uptight in the city I have noticed and it seems jus expecting orher ppl to be bad or malicious.

OP posts:
Seafog · 14/12/2021 19:11

When I loved in a apartment building, we had letters handed out asking is not to buzz in anyone we didn't know personally.
The idea of a secure building means either you use you keys, or contact the building superintendent to let you in.
Also if this is the second time in two months, they may be suspicious.

Original poster
Middmary · 14/12/2021 19:12

Hahahaha! Tell me about it! Second time since we moved here! Doors lock automatically so I dont need my key when I leave the house! Its getting very easy to leave without them

OP posts:
Original poster
Middmary · 14/12/2021 19:15

Disagree with u all 😂😂😂 but thanks for responding. If i knew how to contact the superintendent i would be doing tht not waiting outside for 6 hrs. No idea how to do this and was never gicen a number. But oh well

OP posts:
akissbeforebed · 14/12/2021 19:19

I would suggest you get to know some of your neighbours and at least swap phones numbers so you can call one of them next time this happens (because it's bound to happen again).

BumCatSmile · 14/12/2021 19:19

Many apartment block managements specifically tell you not to buzz in anyone outside of your own household.

Lots of people above have given reasons for this.

So have you locked yourself out twice if someone previously let you in?

CheesyWeez · 14/12/2021 19:20

I used to be so scared of locking myself out of our flat. I put a door key in a plastic bag on a long string and buried it in the park. I had to use it once, I pulled the string that I had left sticking out of the ground. I thought that if anyone found the key they would have no idea which building it was for.
You could ask your neighbours for their phone numbers maybe?

SnackQueen · 14/12/2021 19:21

Perhaps focus your energy on working out how to not to lock yourself out so often rather than pissing off your new neighbours who don't know you, don't know what you look like and thus did not recognise you on camera? If it was "late, dark and cold" and my doorbell rang unexpectedly and a stranger appeared on camera there is no FREAKING WAY I would answer it.

Original poster
Middmary · 14/12/2021 19:24

Calm down @SnackQueen

OP posts:
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